The Modern Chronicles of Konpaku Yuuji
by Pasonia Seltia Keros
Summary: When drama, discoveries and adventure enter outsider Pasonia S. Keros' life in this author-surrogate story, it would become a Modern Chronicle of a modern man, stuck deep in an unidentified fantastic world. Note: Crossovers in certain chapters!
1. Next World

**Author's Notes: Author Surrogate/OC X Suika. Not much of inappropriate-for-kids dialogue.**

My twenty-first birthday is coming in September, but over the past few months I've been struggling to find for the meaning of life, and the possible existence of another world. Except for near-death experiences and after-life communications, I've not been able to scour for more information because they simply were regarded as superstition. I for one, do believe that there is actually a scientific rationale for the existence of a soul as a separate entity, a unit that is not truly "measurable".

Let me introduce myself first, in summary. I am Pasonia Seltia Keros, who had since young been living under all sorts of guardianship, but never a permanent home. I do, however, excel in martial arts through a combination of talent and training, and thus I am considered an underground prodigy; this due to the fact that I refuse to have my pictures taken (or to be more precise, the moment I see someone with a camera or a camera phone, I smash their devices to bits.)

People who know me and who invites me to tournaments, usually carry a rule of "bring your phones at your own risk". So, out of that violent bit about me, and more about the me that I know I am now; I do earn a decent living, and I depend on another prodigy friend of mine – albeit at the other end of the prodigy scale, the brainy type – who invested my money in the stock market and tenfolded it. That's what you get when you have fantastic friends, but at the same time the underground constantly looks for me in part because they know I've got this friend, and money laundering is so open it's definitely criminal. In fact, it's gotten so bad this time that I've decided to make a trip to Japan, a place I've been looking forward to visit but just didn't really have a reason or any mood to.

""""""

"Mr. Keros, welcome to Japan," greeted the counter staff with a bow and a very strained accent of English that I could only weakly smile by. Even though I have a less-than-stellar personal background, I refuse to allow that to put my being into a stereotype; whatever the reason, courtesy has to be shown even though I do find it pretty trivial at times, especially at 1:30AM in the morning.

I checked the "guide to Tokyo"; mostly broken English, so I didn't really bother reading it after flipping through five pages of gibberish. I hailed a taxi and asked them to bring me to Hokkaido, though I didn't understand why they just laughed me off whenever I tried, both in English and in my severely-limited Japanese.

"Man, what's with all these people? I just wanna make a trip to Hokkaido, so what are they laughing their asses about?"

Then my mobile rang – it was my investor prodigy friend.

"Hey, Pas, where the hell are you? I thought I told you to meet up at Haneda Airport."  
I looked around the building. "Uhh, you said Tokyo International Airport the last time around, didn't you?"  
"That's NARITA International Airport, you fool! It's already 2AM here!"  
Very nicely, the moment of revelation came not a moment too soon when I saw a huge sign on one of the TV boards that said "Tokyo Narita International Airport." I looked around frantically for any signs of ticket counter staff, but was half-hearted; I was half-expecting nobody at the counters because the moon's pretty far up in the sky.

"So what do I do now?"  
"Late-night taxi services. Just tell them to bring you to a budget hotel nearby or something. Be prepared for a tight accommodation; sometimes you end up sleeping in capsules if you end up not finding a proper hotel, but that's better than nothing."  
Capsules? Oh what a great idea to be in one, I thought to myself. "Uh, sure. So how do I get to you?"  
"We'll talk tomorrow. I'd arrange for something."

It was then that I suddenly found a girl standing behind me.

"You're going towards the North, sir? I have a vehicle for that."  
"Timely. Your English is pretty heavily accented, though."  
"Tee-hee."

I didn't even give this girl a second thought; on first eye-assessment, I couldn't tell what she was up to, but I was confident that if anything arose, I'll have enough street smarts to get myself out of trouble. Though, the way she wore her horn ornament thing was pretty distinctly Japanese-y, and cute, if I do say so myself. Probably she'd just left work from some kind of slave or maid or whatever café.

""""""

"A… trishaw, girl? You're going to bring me to this place Hokkaido in a trishaw?"  
The girl just stared at me lazily. "Take it or leave it. You needed to be up north, no?"  
"Uh… pretty much, yes. But if you're going to use twenty-two years to get me there, I'd rather not."  
The girl guffawed loudly. "Just sit in, and hang tight."  
"Luggage, inclusive?"  
"…Luggage, inclusive."

So, trying to play out the cacophonic action a little bit more, I stuffed a travel bag and another into the back of the trishaw, before getting seated at the back end.  
"Safety belts," she gestured, pointing at the strap beside me.  
"I won't need it," I shrugged. _Like she would travel at the speed of sound._  
Again the girl guffawed, something which I don't feel particularly at ease with because girls are usually mindful, usually don't take the initiative especially when they are much smaller in stature, and usually don't wear horns on their heads.

Of course, I hadn't banked on the fact that I could be wrong, as I slowly laid my back to rest in the inclined seat of the trishaw. In a split moment when I wasn't quite perceptual, I suddenly had this awful premonition that the wheels of the trishaw were no longer spinning, or moving. When I took a good look outside to see what was going on, I nearly freaked out.

"WHOA!"

The girl acted as if nothing was happening, but I was clearly looking at a rather large, Eiffel Tower-eisque building to my left, where the observatory was. To add on to the shock, I was in-flight while looking at it from the trishaw's passenger seat area. I could even see the late-night staff on the tower, dropping whatever they were doing and witnessing the spectacle.

"What in tarnation is this?"  
"Don't worry! We'll be in the North in no time at all!"  
"We'd be going South if you don't land NOW!" I yelled, totally out of character. "How could a flying trishaw be possible!"

As if obliging by my wish, the girl suddenly maneuvered the trishaw towards a rather large bridge – I would assume this to be the Rainbow Bridge that some of my acquaintances have spoken of. Once the trishaw landed on the road surface, my guts, hung since my realization of being in-flight, swiftly began to settle.

"Thank goodness we're back on earth," I sighed.  
The girl guffawed – yet again. I took that to be a bad sign, and decided on putting the seat belts for fear that something might happen.

From behind us, I could hear the roar of a couple of powerful, souped-up engines – must be a night-time street race of sorts. The vehicles dodged us from both sides as they nearly took off the trishaw's hooded upper canopy which covers my head.

"Hang on tight."

As she spoke those words, the trishaw itself began to go faster and faster, until everything before my eyes was a slate of blur.

"Why the hell me, of everybody!" I started screaming at the top of my lungs, half terrified to bits and half excited to bits about coursing down a road – in a trishaw – at what I thought was a speed pretty close to the speed of sound. I could only so much as take a glance at the two cars which overtook us just now; what was quite distinct to me, though, was their state of shock in seeing a trishaw rocketing past their expensive machines.

"Because… because you're a human with no real friends! That's why I need you to come along with me!"  
"What do you mean, I have no real friends! Mind your words, young lady!"  
The girl simply guffawed, and I dare not speak anymore. Every time she guffaws, something bad happens.

*SNAP!*

"What the hell was that?"  
"Uhh… hee hee, I broke the trishaw's handlebars," said the little girl, totally smiling at me while I looked straight ahead of us, horrified.

A moment of rationalism came through in the crisis; if we have enough momentum, we would crash through a barricade or two, then fall towards the body of water which I suspect is the Bay of Tokyo or something. That would certainly be a horrible end to my young life.

I couldn't tell for sure, yet my first gut instinct was to leap out of the trishaw, and grab my luggage if I could. Under the increasing swaying motion of the trishaw at speeds close to sound, I tugged at my luggage, then pulled it out while leaping off the trishaw all at the same time when I was sure I was close to the left road shoulder.

The trishaw cracked up, then smashed into many different parts when it hit a nearby divider. And had I not acted quickly, my luggage and my guts would be strewn all over the road as well. A few scratches on my clothing, but nothing I'd ripped on my way out of the trishaw.

"Where'd the girl go, though?"

"Aha ha ha… Look at you scramble."

I got really annoyed this time, at this mysterious girl who'd somehow managed to land me from one hell to the other, drinking deep from a flask. "What the heck you laughin' at? I almost got my ass smacked back there by a road divider! Just who the hell are you?"

"I am just a drunken little oni," she sang away, apparently inebriated. I noticed she held a rather large flask kind of thing, though it looked pretty ancient, what with the gourd.

"Want a drink? It's on the house."

Given how she'd been belching the bloody thing just moments ago (tilted 180 degrees no less!), I'd say no to drinking her saliva. But she insisted, and given that she is clearly not from this world, I had no choice but to oblige to this crazy little girl, and drank from the gourd by tilting it slightly. That was when I yelped in surprise at the hot sensation in my tongue.

"Whoa!" Being a drinker (the savor type, not the binge-drinking type), I could immediately tell just by sticking my tongue into the gourd that the sake in it was pretty strong. Strangely, even though the liquid within had this flowy motion and didn't feel very heavy, the sake didn't seem to reach any end. I took a long belch from it, and passed it back to her.

"Just who the heck… are you?" I hiccupped as she giggled at my increasingly hotter face. "I mean, you're definitely not from this world, now are you?"

Suika grinned. "Of course not, you silly old man, I'm just a drunken little oni."

"Hey, now that ain't a lotta details from you. Can't you tell more about yourself? And can't you get me to a hotel?"

"A hotel? What's that? I only know of inns and onsen, and not very much about this hoe-tell thing."

"You must be kidding. Just get me to the downtown area."

"No go. Anywhere with too many tall structures tend to make me sick. As though the Hakugyokurou doesn't already make me sick, there's tons of them in this world."

"We're really getting nowhere with this. I suggest we find somewhere to sleep."

"Sleep? Hmm…"

""""""

We walked into a nearby wooded area; I got a little worried because there was some kind of military warning sign thing that was in Japanese, but Suika brushed that aside and instead led me down the forested area. Clearly she'd either very confident of herself, or she knew the geography of the area very well.

"So… we're in a dark place where I can hardly see myself," I remarked casually.  
"Stop complaining, old man, just watch."

The little girl delivered a punch on the forest ground, and immediately I found myself falling on all fours, crashing into the forest growth. When I stood up, I could feel – though not really see – that we're somewhere below ground, and somewhat secure from outside intruders.

"There. I punched a hole into the forest floor. Now we can sleep."

I didn't bother protesting with this weird little "drunken oni", so I stacked my luggage on my head and slept right away. The nostalgia factor was pretty strong, though, as soon I found myself unable to sleep (in part due to the really powerful sake hitting my head hard).

""""""

_Where is this… where am I?_

_I tried to find a logic to the empty world I ended up in, but came up with an answer that felt like my surroundings._

_Emptiness._

_I suddenly heard words being spoken in a language that I felt strangely familiar with, yet I could not discern._

"…_take… baby… along…"  
"…can't… male… Konpaku…"  
"…outside… outside…"_

_Konpaku? Baby? Male? All these words confused me greatly. Why did I suddenly have such weird dreams?_

""""""

"Rise and shine!"

I was awakened to the sound of a familiar voice; the same voice from recent memory… and then.

"WHOA!"

In no time at all, I felt the floor beneath rising so quickly, that I was caught unprepared as I slammed face-first into a rather thick tree branch right above me.

"Oops, I went a bit too far with that!" Giggled the mysterious oni.  
"What the hell did you think you're doing?"  
"Sorry!~"

I couldn't be bothered arguing with this little oni while being literally stuck above ground, on a tree branch.

"Girl, can I ask you something?"  
"Hmm?"  
"Just what in tarnation is your name?"  
"What's a 'tarnation'?"  
"Never mind that. Please state your name, age, occupation, gender, location."

The girl pretended to think at length, so I played along and pretended to snap.

"Just answer me!"  
"Oh alright alright! It's only because it's you, that's why I'd answer you."  
"Just spit it already."  
"My name is Ibuki Suika, also known as the Drunken Little Oni. I don't know what the hell's a "gender", but if that means to ask if I'm a boy or a girl, I'm a girl. My occupation is none."

"Vagrant," I uttered.

"Location, hmm, I believe my home is a placed called Gensokyo."  
"Gensokyo… is it something like Edo? Or… uhh.. Nagoya?"  
"Nope, those townships have nothing to do with Gensokyo."

Uh, to be honest, I almost wanted to correct her; neither of those two cities, according to what I read on the Internet, are "townships". But whatever, really, I couldn't give a damn about that anymore.

"So are you getting me near town, or something?"  
"Actually, I can't get you near any more civilization," smirked the oni.  
"And why the hell is that?"  
"You will know when you follow me. Come on."

""""""

Suika scoured around for the trishaw's remains, which were, to my surprise, all on the side of the highway we crashed out of.

"We're going to take a rather high route, so don't say I didn't warn you this time."

Warn, indeed. I quickly got onto the trishaw, making sure that every piece of my luggage is lashed and secured as properly as I could.

" Hang tight, Konpaku! We're going to fly!"

This time, I lost my fear completely, allowing the suspense of disbelief to lure me into some sort of modern-day fantasy land. "Woooooooo! We're flying, man, wow!"

"…you obviously haven't yet seen the best…"

"Hmm? What do you mean, I haven't seen the best," I asked Suika, curiosity piqued.

"In Gensokyo, there's a 'Shrine Maiden of Paradise' who could easily take off into the skies of her own free will."

"Wh-what? You not shittin' me, she could just 'fly'?"

"I'm not kidding with you. Oh, she'll be one of the first people I bring you to, simply because she's at the border between this world and Gensokyo."

"I'd assume that to mean she's a customs officer," I remarked. "Even so, it's nice to know there's at least some kind of order where you come from. You behave absolutely as though the world's yours!"

"Well, I broke a fake moon once upon a time," laughed Suika. "So theoretically speaking, if I can maintain my presence in this realm for longer than a week, I can and I will take over this world. Unfortunately, I can only stay for exactly twelve _shichen_, following which I have to go back or risk losing powers for two weeks. If I end up like that then I can't even fight off a wolf youkai."

"Whoa, whoa, one at a time, please, I need time to digest all these information," I stopped her before she proceeded with more alien terms. "Youkai? Shichen? Gensokyo? Give me some time to absorb all these, man, I can't know everything at once. Oh, gimme a bit of me-time, too, I got personal matters to attend to."  
"Hurry it up, whatever you're doing. We're going to enter the border via an air route. You have only a short while before we reach the overhead border."

I reached over my bag, and dug my mobile out. It was just basic courtesy to call to my investor prodigy friend.

"Hey."  
"Where the hell'd you been, Pas? I've even got the concierge ready at Narita!"  
"Sorry, man, some, uhh… business to attend to," I lied. "I… uhh… gotta head back stateside to settle some stuff for Gramps."  
"Argh, what a shame it had to come to this. Fine then, I'll see you again in a few."  
"Later."

Not a moment too soon, it would seem. The powers of the wind suddenly pressured me so badly, I felt like I was being squashed by some unknown force to the left and right, top and bottom of me.

"This… feels… terrible…"  
"Heads up! Don't look downwards!"  
"Is it always… this tough getting through the border?"  
"Usually it isn't! I'm going to screw Yukari over when we cross. A little more!"

A little more **WHAT**? If not for my experience as a part-time diver, I would've given up and thrown myself off the flying trishaw. The pressure is so great it was incredibly painful, and all my organs, I swore, were being pushed downwards and out of my body.

"We're almost there, Konpaku!"  
"Who the hell is this 'Konpaku'!" I yelled, not having any idea just why this word 'Konpaku' had been sticking its ass on my face.  
"You!" She yelled.  
"I have a name, and it's Pasonia Seltia Kero------"

Right before I was about to spit the "s" syllable, I felt a sudden, but gratifyingly immense sense of relief over my entire being. Whatever border we've been trying to pass, we got through.

"We're finally through… the border," she gasped. "I'm going to kill Yukari for this… My horns, dammit!"

Whoever this 'Yukari' was, I blurted, must've been an ultra great sloth or something to toot my guide's horns bad (quite the literal), but conclusions about people I don't already know may prove too hasty, yet. Slowly, I could feel the trishaw going into a descent and not far from us was one of those Shinto Shrine places I've only ever seen on television and the Internet.

"We're approaching the Hakurei Shrine. Reimu! Reimu! We're here now! The Konpaku is with us now!"


	2. Interactions

**Author's note: I write for the sake of writing, so any reviews is really a nice bonus to me. Ze!**

""""""

"_So, this is the guy that Yuyuko-san wants to meet, ze?"  
"Pretty much so, Marisa, but I doubt he's the guy."  
"No way I could mistake 'im, trust me."_

I could only watch blankly, utterly ignored by three girls (one in a Shinto Shrine Maiden outfit, another in a very witch-like getup with a black-and-yellow schema) who're conducting their own debate about me in what I think I understood as Japanese, and decided to take a good look at the surroundings while the fracas continued.

It was spring in Japan, so the cool weather and the cherry blossoms so famous outside of Japan also appeared in this particular Shrine, in full force no doubt. The sky was a treat to look at; pristine blue, with a tinge of white to it. It was a truly fantastic place to soak in the sights of, and I wondered why in heavens hadn't this place become a tourist attraction or something.

"_That said, he's been outside here for this long. I wonder why Yuyuko specifically called for this young man at this point of time."  
"No point talking so much. Look, our guest has been left hanging all on his own,"_ chirped Suika. "How'd you like the place, Konpaku?"  
"I said my name is Pasonia S—"  
"Fine, fine, whatever. Marisa, you read so much, surely you know the English language?"  
"What, the private tongue of the Scarlet Devils?" The girl in the witch costume blurted. "Of course I do. Otherwise Patchouli wouldn't so much as give a second look at me."

The witch came over to me, and shook my hand.

"My name is Marisa Kirisame, human, magician. The stupid shrine maiden over there is Hakurei Reimu, but we all just call her 'red-white.'"

I can totally tell why. Red-white indeed, but I can't afford to laugh lest I get screwed over by my hosts, so I just politely nodded in the maiden's direction while she scowled at the witch.

"_So, what happens now? I mean, a guy with near zero knowledge on the tongue, that'll make it hard for him to even talk to Yuyuko, ze. We all know her old and hard-to-understand style of speech and language."  
"Well, even so we can't just leave this boy alone and stuff since we all took the trouble to bring him in from the outside world. We should probably make our way to Eientei for this."  
"Eientei? Why that god-forsaken rabbit palace of everywhere you can think of, Suika?"  
"Well, I hear the pharmacist there treats anything. Including __language problems__, maybe?"  
"That's a tad far-fetched, but Miss Yagokoro is just a human from the Rabbits' Palace anyway. I don't perceive a problem with that which you can't settle with a few to her face, ze."  
"_ Uh, Mister Keros?"

"Yes, hornie? I was thinking you'd totally forgotten my existence."  
"'Hornie' is not my name. It's Ibuki Suika, just call me Suika."  
"Yea, whatever, Miss Ibuki. What is it?"  
"How about I show you around the place? We should first go to a place you're familiar with."  
"May I know why I had be singled out for this particular suggestion?"  
"You'll find out when we get there. Reimu, where's the _bento_ boxes? We're really famished."

The shrine maiden hastily rushed towards the both of us with two bags of something.

"_These should do for the trip. I hope we're doing this right for the sake of Youmu."_

Youmu… it must be a name. The name struck a really deep chord within me, as though goosebumps rose at the very thought of the word. I was sure I'd heard of that name somewhere before, a long time ago.

…

That was when I realized one thing that I hadn't been alert to. Normally, even as a baby or toddler one would retain some memories of parents, or even childhood guardians; for me, oddly enough my life only 'began' at around age six, which was a memory of eating vanilla ice cream with my first guardians; a pair of elderly folk, the Rodriguez family, they died when I was around nine or ten.

_So what happened __before__ that?_ This question popped up before when I was in Grade Eight (I dropped out a year after because I'd wanted to live on my own, but I still took night classes to make up for it), but back then it was just one of many random thoughts that I later dismissed as adolescent bullshit today.

"What you dreamin' about? The horse carriage's here. We're both gonna eat our lunches in there."

"Huh." The whole horse carriage thing made me realize that this world is actually kinda backwards, and I began to wonder if it was actually possible to survive in this world without all the techie shmuck we'd all been so used to.

And then…

"Hey, uhh, where's the forks and spoon?" I blurted, to which all three of them suddenly burst into rapturous laughter which I don't understand anything about.

""""""

"Here we are at Kourindou," announced Suika. "I am sure the shop owner would love to meet you. Rinnosuke, dammit! Where are you?"

"…"

The shop itself, viewed from the street, was pretty run-down, and there're traces of burn marks and sword cuts all over the shop. Given this state of affairs, certainly there must've been many a fight in this shop, and given that walking disasters like the girl right beside me must exist by the droves, it certainly wouldn't be a surprise at all. What does disturb me is why this "shop owner" doesn't ever bother to renovate his own shop.

"_I'm busy. No business for the day."  
"Aww, shut it! Something of yours must be broken or something!"_

What a bloody ruckus.

"_I said NO BUSINESS FOR THE DAY, SUIKA---"_

"Hi," she blurted, casually walking right into the establishment amidst the shop owner's protests. "I brought you a person you might want to know. Pasonia, this is Morichiya Rinnosuke, shop owner of Kourindou."

The shop owner came out of the back of his shop, and then stared coldly at us. I took a look at his clothing, and concluded that this world is really that much more archaic than I initially thought it was, what with his something-like-a-dress getup and his old-style, humongous spectacles from last century. But the shop's displays are quite fantastic, it almost seemed like I walked right into a home appliances shop or something, given the stuff he displays all over. Only the odd books – which I swore were either moving, or winking at me – were any sign of this store's roots in this world.

"Morichika Rinnosuke," corrected the shop owner. _"Hajimemashite."  
_"Hajime… what?"  
_"Oh, umm, sorry, he hasn't really been living in the immediate outside world called Nihon, that's why he doesn't know the language very well. It's the same tongue as is spoken in the Scarlet household."_

"_That vampire girl? Augh, I hate her, Suika, you know, the other day her maid Sakuya just walked in and said 'hey can I get a couple of perfume bottles' and without paying me she took off with the bottles do you know how long it took for me to procure the bottles from Yukari now I have to go replace it I am already very poor why are you guys doing this to me is this guy going to---"_  
"Shut up," Suika butted in with a slap on Rinnosuke's face.  
_"Ouch, what the hell Suika?"_  
"You speak too fast. You're scaring my friend."

Friend, huh, Suika? Hum, it's not like I'd do myself any favor not being her friend. That said, I do agree that he speaks so fast in Japanese it's almost unreal, though I very much disagree that I'm terrified.

"_Whatever. Why'd you bring him here?"  
"Well, I'm doing you a favor here. You've been fixing with that music player thing for ages, haven't you?"  
"Well, yea, I've been trying to turn it on but I couldn't get it to work. What a pain…"_

I took the music player from his hands, guessing from what he was saying to Suika. It was a simple Creative MP3 player device with about three hours of music left in it, and by the looks of it, he did manage to turn it on, all it's lacking is a suitable pair of earphones.

"Sir, do you have other items?"  
_"What'd he ask for?"  
"He asked if you got other items?"  
"Why'd you need them for? You want to steal from me?"_  
"I don't steal," I retorted, noting the defensive stance he suddenly started, "but you're totally getting the use of this item wrong. You need a pair of earphones."  
_"Earphones? Uhh… oh, yea, I have some, if these are the right stuff."_

He disappeared to the back of the store; I'd assume he knew what to look for.

"Yukari told me some stuff about this guy Rinnosuke some time ago when I went over to her residence," blurted Suika.  
"What exactly?"  
"He knows the name of outside world stuffs just by taking one look. Though he hardly uses them."  
"Not surprising."  
"I should tell you that he has never, ever stepped out of Gensokyo before."  
"What, what? You're not shittin' me?" _How can anyone know the use of something without ever using it before?_  
" I don't think he could withstand the border entrance like we did earlier."  
"Don't remind me of the nightmare, little girl. I puke every time I think of it," I replied matter-of-factly.  
"Ugh, yer right there old man. Here he comes."

"_I found something, does this work?"_

I almost wanted to kill Rinnosuke for **this**; he's telling me he "found something" which was like, one of the more high-end earphones out there that you can bring around and show off with. In fact, it's one of those earphones I've been scouring the shops for before I came here, god dammit.

"Where the hell did you get this Sennheiser shtick?"  
_"Sennheiser? What is a Sennheiser?"_

I rephrased that, realizing that the brands I just mentioned, mentally or otherwise, are totally alien concepts to people in this world. "I mean, who sold you these earphones?"

Rinnosuke proceeded to ramble on in Japanese, which caused him to get a slap on the head yet again.

"Sakuya, an acquaintance of ours, got this for him. Says she went on a shopping trip in a downtown area of the outside world---"

_Akihabara, any time of the year…_

"…and when she got back she just took this to the store, sold him this for a thousand bucks."

"Talk about total fleecing," I blurted. "This thing doesn't cost more than four hundred dollars in the outside world, that's for sure."

Suika promptly translated for Rinnosuke, and Rinnosuke promptly raged and flung some stuff around the shop. I heard a vase smash; that was such a pity, I bet he didn't know it was a Ming-era vase (or at least the patterns on it did give that vibe, but I wasn't a vase connoisseur or anything to know if that shit was really a Ming vase or a made-in-China duplicate). Not wanting to correct him, I plugged the earphones into the port and passed it over to the shop owner.

"_Wh… whoa! Whoa! WHOA! The stuff here, this music… it definitely rivals the Prismrivers', and is not even half as dangerous!"_

"_Told you. _He's happy now. We'll need him on our side so he'll _'tell us when Miss Yagokoro's messenger would visit here'_, that's what red-white said."  
"Miss Yagokoro? Who might that be?"  
"Eirin Yagokoro of Eientei, a lady whom we call the Rabbits' Palace Miracle Healer. She apparently comes from the Moon.

"The Moon? But… there's nothing on it, as far as the outside world is concerned."  
"There isn't? Well, what we do know about the Moon from Eientei's recent exposition, was that they're that far beyond us in this thing called 'technology', even beyond the outside world's."  
"You've got to be pulling my legs. If we're advanced enough to have nukes, they'd have death cannons to kill entire planets!"

_Why the heck am I thinking of deadly weapons right now, though?_

"I'm not. When we get to Eientei, we'll find out."

""""""

"Welcome back, ze!"

The first to greet us back at the shrine as the sun began to set, was the same witch girl from before. Marisa Kirisame, if memory serves me right.

"Thanks for the welcome," I blurted, noting that there was a girl nearby with cat ears, and a box full of dolls right beside her. "Is anything the matter? There seems to be quite a party here."  
"Oh, uh, Yukari and Alice have just arrived."

Yukari, huh, the name sounds familiar for sure.

"Well, if it hasn't struck you by now, it's all thanks to Yukari that we had to suffer the pressure. My horns are going to take a week to straighten back up to the perfect forty-two degrees!"

_Mental note to self: Even a horned girl has pride in fashion. Check, check._

""""""

"Hey, Suika, welcome back. I gotta go now."  
"Hold it right there, Yakumo!"  
"What's the matter?"  
"You… why have you totally forgotten to open up the portal? D'you had any idea how tough it was to pass through the Hakurei Border because you forgot to open the damn thing up?"  
"Ran! Ran! Is there such a matter today?"  
"Uh, yes, madam, I called you in the morning to remind you but you said 'I'm going back to sleep', so I didn't bother anymore."

"Ran! What the hell?" Suika exclaimed so loudly I could hear her even as I was sipping the maiden's tea slowly at the other end of the shrine.

"_You know the mistress, Suika-san…"_

I could only watch on in clear confusion; I know the two must be talking about this morning's incident, but I hadn't had the heart to step in, for fear that I would end up getting killed if the girl decides to use her strength on any of the household items.

"_YUKARI, EAT THIS!"  
"Don't wreck my shrine, Suikaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!"_

A tad too late, though it was definitely controlled rage coming from Suika. The chair flew halfway across the room, and given the speed it was impossible to have dodged it. But by some major stroke of masterpiece, I saw the lady Yukari teleport to the other end of the room and towards where I was, the chair flying all the way out of the shrine and breaking into three different pieces.

That was when I realized that the lady was right beside me, and as luck would have it, a second chair came hurtling my way as Yukari teleported elsewhere to safety.

Oh shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii-------

"**Yuuji, jump, NOW!"**

I didn't know where that warning came from, but at that instant I somersaulted upwards, narrowly avoiding the chair by the thread of my hair.

"Whoa!" The rest of the spectators watched on.  
"Take your fight out of the shrine, the both of you! You nearly killed our V.I.P. back there!"

Even though I did manage to avoid the chair, the suddenness of my own evasive move threw my balance off, and I could not achieve a proper landing as I lay splat on the shrine flooring, in all fours.

"You all right, Konpaku? I'm sorry the chair flew that way…"  
"Next time, **aim** your bloody chair before you throw! That was far too close!" I blasted as Suika winked at me apologetically.

"_So, that's the outsider you've been talking about, girls?"_  
"Yep, Alice, that's our V.I.P. from the outside world. The name's uhh, crackers?"  
"Keros… Pasonia Seltia Keros, or you can just call me Pas. Your name, madame?"

Out of courtesy, the moment I got up from the floor I extended my gesture towards the lady in a blue shirt – white skirt combo.

"What courteousness," giggled the blonde. " I am Alice Margatroid, of Bucharest."

Bucharest, it's a lovely city this time of the year, that I know of because I've been there to fight just recently. "Margatroid, though, it's a pretty obscure name even for a Romanian," I remarked.

"I heard of you from Reimu, but all the while they've been referring to you as 'the last surviving male Konpaku'. I am interested as to---"  
"Hold on wait a moment there," I gagged, staring at the other girls who'd stopped whatever they were doing. "Miss Margatroid, you just called me a _what?_"  
"Uh, the 'last surviving male Konpaku'."

_Konpaku, Konpaku, Konpaku. Just what the hell does the word 'Konpaku' had to do with me?_

"Suika?"  
"Yes, Pas?"  
"I **demand** to know why I'm being brought here."  
"Well, it's actually pretty simple to talk about the Konpaku family, but a much longer story about why you're now in Gensokyo."

Given Suika's pretty straightforward nature of doing things, I would bet my fighter's instinct on her words. "So tell me more about the Konpaku family."

"Alice, do you have a copy of the Perfect Memento with you, by any chance?" Suika asked.  
"Uh, no, I don't usually carry anything other than Shanghai, Hourai, or my grimoire."  
"Not me either," Yukari added.  
"And what has a Shrine Maiden have anything to do with a book of that volume?"

Anticipating each other's responses, they all said in unison:

"Go to Akyu's!"

""""""

_The next day…_

The carriage stopped as the horse riders pulled the reins. Suika and I then disembarked the ride and looked on in awe at the Hieda family's residence. It was a sight to behold, really; I've heard of stories about Japanese royal families and their grand Japanese housing and architecture, and I was told that most of what was left of Japan's past is in Edo, but I was sure that they were quite wrong since I saw it in Gensokyo. A tower that oversees all else in the background, the distinctive fan-shaped roofs, and the general grandiose of the whole mansion made it almost a sin to set my foot in it.

"Wait till you get to Hakugyokurou," grinned Suika, as if she was expecting my response. "That's where your other family is."

"'Other' family?"

"I really have no mood to explain too much now to a person as inquisitive as you," she sighed, waving a servant of the household over to ourselves. "Please send word that I, the oni Ibuki Suika, am here to look for the Child of Miare on an important matter on behalf of the Shrine Maiden, and I have with me a guest from outside Gensokyo."

"Will do, Ibuki-sama," answered the servant. "PASS THE WORD DOWN – WE HAVE A GUEST FOR OUR HOLY CHILD!"

"'**Holy child'…"**  
"I swear, Pasonia, your appetite for answers is as big as Yuyuko's appetite for food."  
"Who might that be, Suika?"

"We'll get all the answers you need soon enough. Oh, look, the servants are coming this way."

_To be continued…_


	3. The Child of Miare

If the residence of the Hieda family's look real grandiose from outside, from the inside it was simply too regal to tolerate and yet, at the same time it exudes a very traditional kind of feeling -- the Japanese sort of 'traditional', that is. We were at Akyu's room, a small room that didn't seem very old compared to the rest of the house, with the four treasures, some pencils and erasers as well as paper nearby; the room oversaw a large pond of sorts, and occasionally the family servants would be spotted walking from one end to the other, carrying trays of tea or rolls of cloth.

The "Child of Miare" Suika spoke of, though, was really a "child" in the truest sense of the word. It was surprising to see a real human child in this strange little world, but then again, I got a gut feeling the "child" must be something real special if Suika and four other girls had to introduce me to her just to know more about the Konpaku family, of which I am alleged to be a "last surviving male member" of.

"_The 'Child of Miare'… so, uh, can you tell us more about the Konpaku family?"_ Suika asked.  
_"I do believe I have a small mention in my Memento, but about the Konpaku family, there's some stuff that cannot go to print. Including where they were, this of which I know from my previous life."_  
"No, no, we don't need to know that one, Miss Akyu. We need to know just the family itself."

The child slowly rose from the chair that more than towered over her, and then began to speak in earnest. As most of her speech was in Japanese, I had to rely on the horned girl's translation for help.

"She says… uh… the Konpaku family are a family of half-ghosts, half-humans. Right, kinda obvious back there."

_Huh. You guys haven't told me anything about this before, how did that suddenly qualify as 'obvious'?_

"…The current member known to Akyu is Konpaku Youmu, a young girl who serves as the gardener of the two-hundred-_yojana_ courtyard of the Hakugyokurou, roughly translated as… uhh… hang on… ah, 'White Jade Tower'."

"Hold on a moment. What the hell is a _yojana_?" I was trying my darnedest not to associate 'yojana' with an oft-repeated Russell Peters joke, but I kept right on going back there.

"I do believe a _yojana_ is about the distance an army could move in a day, on foot," explained the oni.

I assumed that figure to be somewhere along 10 kilometers at the most modest estimate. Then it struck me that two hundred _yojana_, if it's about 10 klicks, it's going to be the same as the distance between Chicago and L.A.; I quickly shook Suika, who was surprised that I was grasping her wrist real tight and taut (that being something I realized later, too).

"No shittin' me, that sorta distance? Could you ask again? **Two freakin' hundred yojana**?"

"The Child of Miare usually doesn't get her words wrong, and neither do I have problems with my hearing."  
_"Is anything the matter? Has the kind sir a question?"  
"Uh, no, just that he could not believe that the courtyard was two hundred yojana long."  
"It is the truth. Reimu brought me there on a visit, on a week when I felt exceptionally healthy. Reimu herself did comment that the place tire her out if we travelled by the long perimeter of the courtyard, but as her company I just feel really blessed, even though the Netherworld isn't usually a placed one will be happy to reside in…"_

"She says it's the truth. You can drop my wrist now," Suika blurted. It was then that I realized that the shock of hearing all that really caused me to sweat and go all shocked, and do stuff I know I'd never have done under normal circumstances.

"What's with you? You weren't even that surprised when I told you about Rinnosuke!"  
"Ugh, I don't know. But how the hell does anybody keep track of a garden **that** big?"

"_I sense the sire doubts the ability of the Konpaku, even though I could feel a faint resemblance to the family in his being. Might he be the last male Konpaku, Suika, the last one that could be traced?"  
"Very much so, Miss Akyu. I was the one who brought him in."  
"I see… well, let's not waste more time on this issue. I will also send a message to Miss Yagokoro regarding my latest batch of capsules. I hope that will aid you in your cause."  
"Thank you, Miss Akyu."_

I could see something of a beam of happiness shooting out of the horned girl, as though she was waiting for Akyu's response like a fish to water.

_What the hell was she getting so excited about, I wondered aloud._

""""""

After a lengthy discussion which lasted from brunch time to around high tea, we were gifted some steamed buns from the family servants. What I did appreciate at the end of our trip to the Hiedas', whilst rocking back and forth in the bumpy roads back to the Shrine, was the amount of information that has thus far come through, mostly through Suika's translations.

Firstly, I was here not because of some weird little drunken oni's whims and fancies at Narita Airport, but because I was apparently one of the **only** people left in the Konpaku bloodline who could actually be _traced, contacted, and brought here_. There were two more other potential Konpaku guys apparently, which then prompted me to ask why I was chosen.

Suika explained (through translation) that as an exit Konpaku ('exit' here meaning to leave Gensokyo) loses most of their powers after about two years outside (and in extreme cases, memories as well), it would be very hard to re-integrate them into a world that their ancestors had initially left behind if more than twenty-five years have passed since their initial exit; in the worst case scenario, any Konpaku could've been crushed to death one second after trying to enter the portal from the outside. Theoretically speaking, however, the borders would be moot for a trained Konpaku if it were just simple and frequently undertaken shopping trips.

_Heaven bless me, I guess, for getting me past two minutes of pressurizing hell._

Secondly, the Konpaku are, as mentioned earlier, a family of half-ghosts and half-humans. On average, the lifespan of a Konpaku is about four to five times the normal lifespan of a human, and the age progression is also relatively slower, probably something like getting old-men wrinkles two-and-a-half-centuries after young adulthood. This does explain, in part, despite the roughs of being an underground fighter, why a lot of people around me call me "baby-face"; my eyes are exceptionally large and my skin, thankfully, is smoother than the coarse-paper textured skin of most people my age and occupation, though some men have approached me with lewd offers.

_With the good comes the really bad, I guess._

Lastly, the Konpakus' long lifespan is due to a ritual or technique revolving the sacred family swords, which were dubbed the _Roukanken_ and the _Hakurouken _sometime in the last millenia_._ Suika's explanation was that as this information was gathered through the observations the Child of Miare made from her incarnations two generations ago, the information on the sword names should be mostly correct; however, even when the Konpaku were a significant family near the borders between the Gensokyo mainland and the Netherworld region due to their services to a woman she called the "Ghost Princess", they were a secretive bunch; as luck would have it, whatever she has written into the Perfect Memento are all she knows regarding the family swords, the names and their purported purposes.

As though any information would really help, I asked if it was possible to obtain a copy of the Memento. It wasn't like I could actually understand Japanese, but I'm sure there're more people out there who could help me while they weren't busy with their whims and fancies, like that witch Marisa who never seems to be too far away from the Shrine. Hopefully I don't wear out everybody's welcome too soon.

"I hoped you're satisfied now by today's trip to the Hieda family residence, Pasonia?"  
"Umm, pretty much yea. Though, face it already, I can't just let go of everything I already had on the outside."

If I disappear from the other side bordering Gensokyo, I'm leaving behind millions in assets, a fantastic girlfriend Nora, and my drinking buddies from the Nordhoff Fight Club. I could leave my assets with my investor friend, but I can't just ditch my girlfriend and totally disappear. Besides, the power of the Internet is scary, and the last thing I want when I return to the other side is to see a Facebook Group that says "Searching for the Missing Pasonia S. Keros".

_I certainly didn't want to become the second Loch Ness._

"Oh, gee, you can leave behind all you own on the outside," suggested Suika, as though she read what I was thinking, though the tone of her voice was anything but friendly. "You humans claim to do everything you could in straightforward manners, but even a half-human like you is suspect to wishy-washy business!"  
"I'm sorry --- what was that again, Suika?"  
"I said, you're dragging your feet in the mud if you can't decide," blasted Suika, "since we'd be wasting everyone's time if you suddenly decide back out two weeks from now. In the outsiders' words, it's something like 'we gotta smooch you' on the rules of this world fast, before you get lost and killed by somebody who can't tell a _villager_ from an _outsider_."  
"Err, by any chance would that be 'we gotta school you' instead of 'smooch you'?"  
"Is there a real difference to that? You're pushing me to do it now, eh? EH?"

_Well, I totally wouldn't mind that… if not for your horns getting in the way. Who could resist a free smooch?_

""""""

"Welcome back, ze," greeted Marisa as we enter the premises of the shrine once again. Truth be told, the shrine itself **grows** on people. It isn't a grand or majestic place like you would expect of a Shinto Shrine, but the presence of the shrine itself seems to be like an antidote to the chaos that goes on both in the outside world and in this place called Gensokyo. Now I appreciate Suika's efforts for taking me here, apart from it being close to the border as an obvious excuse.

"Good evening Miss Kirisame," I returned the gesture. "Say, do you have time helping me out on this book?"

Marisa took a closer look at the book I was holding, and then chortled.

"Aha, so you guys went to Akyu's after all. Yea, I could help you, I'll be hanging around the shrine more for the next week or so because I'm looking for a particular type of plant that I know is around this shrine this time of the year."  
"I can help you, Miss Kirisame. I don't think I'll be going anywhere much the next few days," I offered my help. "Besides, I want to know more about this place. I absolutely am confused as to my standing here."

"_Your… standing?" _She cocked an eye my way, in an 'are you seriously saying that' manner. "As far as I am concerned, your 'standing' in this world is determined by the amount of potential threat you possess. Right about now, you got a guide Suika, whose threat level is not to be underestimated, and if I recall correctly, the Perfect Memento stated that very clearly in an article featuring Suika. If it wasn't because of something happening at the Hakugyakurou which required your attendance, we wouldn't spend the effort looking for you."

That brought me to my next question. "Exactly what is going on at this place, the Hagukyakurou or whatever it is? I am still unclear on my _purpose _for being here."

"The correct pronunciation is 'Haku-gyaku-rou'; also, the Ghost Princess made a strong request for your attendance but is unwilling to say just why she required a **male** Konpaku. I suspect this might be something to do with your great-granddaddy Youki."  
"Youki? Youki _who_?"  
"Konpaku Youki. We know the gardener Youmu's master is this old guy called Youki, and he's pretty old by the time he took Youmu under his tutelage. After about twenty years of training, Youmu said one day he just upped and left the Netherworld completely. Youmu didn't understand why either, and up until now I wouldn't bat an eye to that sort of queer attitude that the people of Gensokyo are very fond of."  
"What'd you mean by 'queer attitude', Miss Kirisame?"  
"I mean, well, we didn't have to worry so much about weird incidents and 'queer' matters, since Reimu here is a very responsible Shrine Maiden who always manages to resolve such 'queer' crises whenever they pop up. Just recently, she went toe-to-toe with godlikes and defeated 'em, ze!"

_Is it really the work of the Shrine Maiden, or that the godlikes have lost their faith in their own powers?_

"In any case, usually I wouldn't bother, but there was one marked difference this time that made us take notice. The Ghost Princess seemed genuinely worried this time around; instead of playing around and suggesting we do stuff out of a whim or just being playful and stuff, she marked her request this time with a very stern tone. As though…"  
"As though… **what**?"  
"It's as though something **massive** and **terribly disastrous** is about to happen. Like, **real massive**, ze."  
"If there was a crisis and since you spoke of the Shrine Maiden, why not…"

Though, even as I said so, I truly was expecting, given Marisa's manner of speech, it could be a crisis that is outside of the Maiden's ability that worries everyone in the know.

"'The Shrine Maiden of Paradise has no role in this problem,' that was what Yuyuko said. It took me a while to get that ancient language she spoke translated in the devil's tongue, ze."  
_"Dinner's ready," _shouted Reimu.  
"Just in time. I was getting a tad hungry myself, ze" remarked Marisa. "By the way, it's the first time since we knew Suika that she has maintained a sober persona for over 24 _shichen_. Even the oni knows it's a serious matter, huh."

"_Shichen?" _I swear, the measurement units they use in this world need some kinda standardization.  
_As though the S.I. units haven't already murdered me left and right in night school, really…_

"If memory serves me right, the _shichen_ would be two outsider hours since a day consists of twelve _shichen_," explained Marisa. "Now let's just chow and forget our worries for a while, ze!"

""""""

Night falls, and the Shrine Maiden had gone to sleep after making sure that the (usually empty?) donation box is still ringing with a bit of cash. Suika, who basically shared her room with me as we lit a candle up for light, explained that as a direct result of a lack in visitors, the donation boxes are perpetually empty, and Suika had had to make trips outside of Gensokyo frequently in order to try procuring practical items that Rinnosuke would want.

"If you'd informed me beforehand, I'd have brought in more stuff," I griped, in part wanting to help the Shrine Maiden a bit.  
"If I didn't bring you in here, Pasonia, you would totally not take my word for it," Suika defended herself. "I'm no smarty pants, just a drunken little oni…" she hiccupped, drinking once again from her gourd.  
"Say, since we've got a bit of time, let us hear a little more about you, Suika," I suggested, in part wanting to get to know my guide a bit more while also being curious as to Gensokyo as a whole.  
"Me? Let's see… I'm an oni. I love parties and feasts. I like to go to places where it's crowded, and I don't really like being alone. Also, I don't lie."  
"That was very candid," I remarked, gesturing for her gourd. She lent it to me, and I drank deep from it, this time being a bit more used to the power of the sake ever since I nearly got crashed by the drink the first night we met.

"How about you, outsider human?" She teased, to which I just scowled in mock irritation.  
"Well, comparatively, my life hasn't been very interesting. As far as I am concerned, I am a dropout from school at the age of fifteen, and I've been fighting competitively in many places around the world as an underground big-money fighter. I got a girlfriend and a lot of buddies from the place where I first started out as a small-time boxer before entering the underground circle. I'm also quite well-off now thanks to a great friend, and I had originally decided to retire from the underground circle come December."

"What'd you want to do after that anyway?"  
"I was about to decide when you dragged me in here," I remarked in monotone.

"Money again, hmm… I wonder why humans are so stuck up about money all the time. It's not like you can bring any of those when you enter the next realm of your existence."  
"The sad truth is, we can't survive in the outside world without enough money," I explained. "There's a saying that goes something like being dirt poor is no longer a viable option for society. That's why I find Mister Morichiya's way of doing business quite… eccentric and unbelievable."  
"Well, yea. He'd have done way better staying at the Kirisame's Magick Shoppe, but he didn't. Speaking of which, I'd like to make a visit to the Human Village sometime soon, but definitely not tomorrow. I also want some me-time, savvy?"  
"… it's not like I'm in a position to stop you," I shrugged, drinking again from the gourd. "Besides, I'm helping Miss Kirisame --- waitaminute, did you just mention something about Kirisame?"  
"Yea, you heard right. Marisa is the eldest and only daughter of the Kirisame family, who runs the Shoppe," Suika explained. "Aww, shucks, stop talking and let's booze, you outsider!"  
"Stop calling me _outsider_, gee! Bottoms up!"

_I'm really beginning to like this place_, I told myself on the inside. Though the lack of technology is really becoming a bugbear as time went by, and in two weeks' time my investor friend would realize that I'm missing. What do I do when that happens, then?

""""""

By next morning, I was up on the wooden futon, with a major headache slamming me bad. I was a social drinker, so drinking strong liquor the way Suika does is not in my league, though letting it loose and all go just like that did feel very invigorating for some reason.

"Hey, Reimu! Reimu! Where'd the lass go, ze…"

That sharp, crisp sound must've been from Miss Kirisame. "Good morning, Miss Kirisame."  
_"Ohayo gozaimazu, gaijin!"_  
"Err, I'm sorry – what?"  
"Oh, right. Good morning, outsider."

_Good lord, stop harping on that already._

"I was just pullin' yer leg! Look at your face change, ze."

"I'm glad you're at least somewhat aware, Miss Kirisame," I noted rather blandly. "Could you give me a moment while I wash up? I just woke up, and the liquor that Suika had was some strong stuff. Whew!"

"Sure, go ahead," she replied, "I'll be waiting at the _torii_, you know, that huge red structure there outside the shrine."

I looked into my travel bag, and found that I only had one clean shirt left before I'd to do the laundry. _Looks like it's time to find for the nearest body of freshwater_, I muttered to myself, _and I'll do it while picking plants with Miss Kirisame._

_If I need to start doing some green thumb work, it's now or never._

To be continued…


	4. Measure of Power and Progress

**Author's notes: Sorry for the long delay between 3 and 4 – Schoolwork is piling sky-high.**

"Found anything yet, outsider?"  
"Nope, not yet, Miss Kirisame," I replied. "This flower you're looking for is _really rare_, isn't it?"  
"That is exactly why we're looking for it," the witch answered, somewhat crossed (hopefully it wasn't me who crossed her). "Augh, where could it be? I saw loads of them two years back in Spring time and yet this year they've all but totally disappeared or something!"  
"Maybe something did happen two years back that gave you that false impression?" I quipped, while looking for the plant. After all, bellflowers that looked like they got a rainbow tint to it didn't seem like something that'll happen very often, yet Miss Kirisame was very persistent and _insistent_ that it must be around.

"Maybe that's true, but that's not an excuse to slack. I've got to do more if I want to become the best human magician there is, ze!"

"'Human' magician?" I nearly questioned her over the term, but decided it might be better not to. Still, she answered me anyway of her own accord.

"There is a race of youkai who are humanoid, and weak in physical ability, but man, they cast the _craziest_ spells around! I think that's what the outsider call 'this is da BOMB'! Geddit, ze?"

The way Marisa spoke of it seemed like it was a big deal, and since I know nothing at all I naturally assumed that a _big deal_ to her is as _big_ a _deal_ as it was to anyone else. I still had a lot to figure out about their nomenclature and stuff.

"When we made our way over to the devil's mansion for the first time, I had a really hard time holding off the witch while red-white went to fight deeper into the mansion. I was so tired out afterwards, I had to rest at home for two full weeks without so much as touching a grimoire, ze!"

"Found it!" By a stroke of luck, my brushing aside some weeds revealed a bellflower tinted in the exact way Marisa had wanted it. She was evidently thrilled and hopping about like a child when I passed the flower over to her. The sad thing was, all it took was one full minute before she decided to do something else – again.

"This can be developed for a Master Spark upgrade at long last! All that's needed now is a little water from the Sanzu River…"

_Wait what? It wasn't even too long ago that we found a fantastic-looking flower, and now, out of the blue, we're going over to a San-something River?_

Then, slowly but surely, the reluctance on my face translated into eagerness; I **just** remembered that I had little clean clothing left, so the best would be to get to a nearby source of freshwater (whether it's purified or not it didn't matter anymore).

"Miss Kirisame, can we go back to the shrine? If I don't get my clothes cleaned I'll be left running around in a pair of briefs."  
"Goodness, the imagery," she cried while slapping her palm on her forehead. "I'm not sure if the lady of the River would allow you to, but I guess you can give it a try, ze."  
"'Lady of the River'?"  
"She's a grim reaper," Marisa remarked in a casual manner. "Well, yea, nothing particularly striking about Komachi, really, but you'll find her easy to chat with. She's multilingual too, ze."

_Wait, what, a Grim Reaper? What the hell? Why would a Grim Reaper – on top of that, a multilingual Grim Reaper - be at a river?_

"Outsider humans, easily surprised by the littlest of things in Gensokyo," snorted Marisa. "If you're going to keep getting surprised you'll soon find yourself in a whole lot of trouble."

_Well, forgive me for being a noob!_

***

The river was… kind of small, I thought. To think Marisa spoke of it at length on our way there and in the end the river wasn't that big, something like a stream maybe.

"What's the matter, out--- seriously, what's your name again?"  
"Pasonia," I replied nonchalantly.  
"So, what's the matter, Pasonia? You reckon this river is big or what?"

I took a look again at the stream. "Uhh… it's small. I don't know why you call it big," I quipped.

"Oh, hey," greeted a young woman clad in a blue traditional costume – by now 'traditional' is a generic term from me that meant clothing I don't know how to describe – carrying what seemed like the most ginormous of scythes I've seen, even comparing to those I've seen in mortal combat fight clubs. "Real nice to have visitors around these parts, this time of the year."

"Hey, Komachi, d'you mind if my friend and I here use some of the River's water? I need it for my Master Spark upgrade."  
The 'grim reaper' now looked more like a 'grin reaper' to me with her rather cheerful smiling and ultra-casual demeanor.  
"Suit yourself. I'm going to check on the flowers a bit in case red-white comes after me like she did a few years back. By the way, I haven't seen this guy before."

"I'm an outsider," I noted candidly. "My name is Pasonia Seltia Keros."  
"Oh, hello… outsider, you say-"

_Not again… argh._

"- but how'd you manage to get in?"  
"With lots of luck, I suppose," I quipped. "Miss Ibuki brought me in here. By the way, I have a question."  
"A question? I suppose I could answer if it doesn't involve Shikieiki-sama."

I jabbed a thumb at the river. "Why does Marisa call this a river, when all I see is a really small stream of water?"

Komachi chortled at length, but I wasn't sure if that was a good sign or a bad sign.

"Oh ha ha… Actually, well, you're right too, but so is she."

_Hardly amusing, Miss Grin Reaper, I can't even laugh at that._ "What's the deal, really?"

"Okay, you see, the length of this river is, should I say, 'variable'. Take it this way – the river itself is a sort of barometer to the cumulative spiritual progress you've made in your lifetime. This won't change even after you die and become a spirit looking for me."

Those words struck me really hard.  
_My spiritual progress is quite close to nil if that was what Miss Grin Reaper meant._

"Huh… no shitting me…"  
"No kidding. But for outsider humans this is hardly surprising. So far, the only outsider human passenger I got who commented that this river was wide was a centenarian who recently came to me from the outside. Says she's kind of placed all her faith in the Bodhisattva or something since sixty years ago, which I reckon does help, but that's about it. I don't know how Shikieiki-sama judged her, though I'm expecting something favorable. Maybe that old lady got herself a rebirth into Shangri-La, or Bhava-agra."

"How's hell look like?"

Komachi stared blankly at me. "As much as I would like to say more about it, my contractual clause forbids me to mention this to anyone without clearance. Else I'll be fired from my job, heaven forbid."

"Oh for the love of god," I grumbled.  
"Say, I sense a combative aura around you, the sort that emerges from people who's gotten themselves in a whole lot of physical fights. Were you some boxer or fighter?"  
"Uh-" I was quite taken aback (more of surprise) by the grin reaper's question. "I was the best fighter in my fight club. I fought all over the world for prize money," I explained. "It seemed interesting and exciting to those who're not in the midst of the shit behind the scenes, believe me."

"I can emphatise with that. Some ghosts did say that the job of a Shinigami is interesting, but in the end the one who doesn't get leave or overtime pay is also me," she sighed.

"You're not the only one Komachi," interjected Marisa. "You forgot Youmu and Sakuya, ze."  
"Oh, right, yea."

By the time our little talk ended, my dirty clothing's all finished washing (it smells kind of musky now that I don't have soap for the clothes) and it was nearing sunset with the faintest of orange glow hanging in the skies above. Still, what the grim reaper said did kind of bother me, but thankfully I was ready to let that go and let someone else decide how to judge me in due time.

_After all, when you're in foreign lands, it's a bit of a no-brainer not to think such deathly thoughts._

***

"Welcome back, you two."

_Surprise, if it isn't the horned girl back at the shrine._

"Where'd you been to, Suika?" I blurted out as soon as I saw her waving at us.  
"I went back to the Youkai Mountain. Word has it they're ready to make some sort of foray into _nuclear materials harvesting _or something."

I furrowed my eyebrows at that statement about nuclear materials.

"What's the matter? You don't sound pleased at all."  
"Well, yea, sort of. I don't claim to be very learnt, but the matter on nuclear materials itself is a subject of hot debate."

Suika shrugged, while belching deep from her gourd again.

"Whatever is happening in the outside world is the very reason why the Hakurei Border was created. Reimu, you know what's up with your seniors before?"  
"Huh, why me Suika? Can't you leave me out of your lectures sometimes?"  
"Just answer already, you old hag," Suika groaned.  
"Well, I don't claim to know, but, well, the Hakurei miko of old times said it was the result of a massive collection of faith."

Faith? Why faith, of everything?

"_The collective faith of the land that united the youkai and humans alike, the collective faith that the land of Gensokyo is a better land leading better lives than the ignorant, war-infested world outside._ That was all that was ever told to me."

Then why the heck did my alleged 'family', the Konpaku family, leave Gensokyo? **Something** seriously doesn't add up here.

"What has faith got anything to do with the border?"

Reimu shrugged. "Faith has a lot to do with the very reason shrines like this one exist. I know because my powers are derived from the people who believe in the powers of the Hakurei Shrine, at the very least."

_Faith, huh, I wondered aloud._ "It's just remote to me, I guess."

"I haven't the slightest clue why you'd be remote to faith, but what I do know is that I've seen your face of disbelief somewhere before, in the face of a devil I fought years ago. She prides herself as the strongest, but in the end, her distrust of even the people around her…"

I noticed Marisa shuffling uncomfortably, which was why I decided not to push the question further. I'm not the sort of guy who'd not care even if I rub people the wrong way, I guess.

"Anyway, faith is a strong thing. If faith can bring about miracles and the powers of gods, then it stands to reason that as long as you have faith you won't be lost. Even if your faith is misplaced, it still works. That's the essential essence to the concept of 'family' and 'kinship'."

"I'm not asking for a lecture," I blurted out, "just being curious."

In truth, I know I was frustrated. _How blind can it get, really, faith and trust and all that bullshit that seemed more likely to be in fairy tales than in real life, seriously?_ At the very least, I only know what I have experienced as a dropout, as a fight club big-money fighter, and as a general rebel to society (at least I truly think so).

It was then that I felt a sharp thing poke at my back; it was Suika, tapping her horns on me (literally, I might add).

"We'll talk more about this back in the room," she murmured.

***

Once again, it's the time of the night where Reimu blows off the candles that light the place. Suika waved her away saying she'll blow the candle out a while later; I know for sure that those are, in fact, **my** candles that won't come back to me. I totally forgot the reason why I brought candles in my travel bags, though.

"Now, Pasonia, I know you've got some seriously stuck-up issues, but didn't you look before you leap?"  
"Whoa, whoa, Suika, wait a moment there, I didn't know you get so serious on issues like those. They weren't that sensitive, were they?"

Suika (once again in her drunken state) suddenly stood up, then held me by the left wrist and half-dragged me all the way outside of our room, and then outside of the Shrine. I didn't understand what was with her sudden gesture, but I took that to assume she wanted me to look at something.

What I didn't expect was to be dragged all the way into the deep darkness of the forest surrounding the Shrine.

***

"Ya got binoculars with you?"  
"Not really."  
"Doesn't matter now. Take a good look at the purplish figure to the back."

I strained my eyes looking into the dark forest. I didn't have night blindness, but man, it gets so hard to distinguish the forest path around me, let alone stare into some space. But that was moot after a purplish figure showed up prominently, glowing bright in the distant.

"That's the crying spirit of Mima, one freakin' devil for a Spirit, who was driven off by Reimu. In case you didn't know, she was also one of Marisa's mentors from almost eight years ago."

Suika really didn't need to speak further, though; I could literally feel a powerful sensation, a burning passion, yet with so much pain and hurt.

"We should leave soon, though… That was Mima's spell: **Heartbreaker's Sonata**. It communicates her strong emotions to the beings around her, affecting them ever so subtly. Even I have trouble resisting it on a night when I'm more sober."  
"That... was some **serious** depression she's got," I commented. "Just what the heck happened between her and the... uh, _miko_?"

Suika chortled. "Well, she and I had a bet years before Reimu knew of my existence. I told Mima to go cry and wallow in self-pity if she couldn't even beat the youngest of the Hakurei Shrine's maidens. Not knowing who's the youngest, though, Mima just murdered every other maiden who got in her way... except Reimu."

_Nasty… so that's the primary reason why Reimu is alone at her shrine now. Heaven wonders how she managed._

"Let me guess, you won your bet. And, of course, you never actually told Reimu about the bet even once."

I could feel Suika stare at me really fiercely, as once again she used the blunt side of her horn to slap at my back.

"Of course I did win that stupid bet! Though I wasn't being serious in the bet, Mima took it really hard when she came looking for me, torn and tattered. On top of being subdued by a mere young acolyte, she lost her sanity. I saw that happen right in front of my eyes."

I had that experience before with a previous opponent, who tried so desperately to win against me that he secretly put in weights for his boxing gloves, so in a way I could emphatise with Mima for going insane after losing to someone like Reimu. Then again, I wasn't here to ally with Mima against Reimu or something.

"So what's this Mima gotta do with me?"  
"Well, Mima's solely obsessed with herself, and placed her faith on herself alone and did not trust Marisa to help her revive herself. In the end, though, and funnily so, when Mima _did_ obtain enough power to subdue Reimu and resurrect herself, she was instead kicked in the proverbial behind by Marisa when Mima's trump card, the Vial of Eternity, was shattered to pieces by Marisa's own doing. Even Reimu didn't know this."

I chortled a bit. "Looks like she got kicked at a time where it mattered the **most**, huh?"

We both heard a loud screech from the purple apparition, and then decided it was the best time to leave. I guess Suika was trying real hard to subtly impress upon me the fact that, on top of the fact that I did not trust in faith, I had a really loose tongue; then again, I wasn't about to begin apologizing for stuff I don't feel I've done anything wrong in, so I just played along.

***

It was almost a week since I took refuge in the Shrine. For two days straight after seeing that purple thing called Mima, I literally had nothing better to do. Marisa wasn't at the shrine for a couple of days, saying she needed to go to the Youkai Mountain or something like that to gather materials for some Master Spark thing. Suika was also out, apparently going through the portal and back into present-day Japan, and ever since the incident that night the miko and I - the only ones left in the Shrine - weren't exactly on great speaking terms; guess that's what happens in life sometimes, even in an alternate world.

Since modern devices run on batteries, I'd no more music or games to play even if I wanted to; all of the devices' power went flat out by the end of the first idle day, and by the second day I decided to look for a secluded area around the church to engage myself in some physical practice. I wouldn't risk getting a beer (in this case, wine) belly from drinking too much from the ever-generous Suika's gourd.

"… Reimu? Reimuuuuuuuuuuuu!"

_Who the flying heck was that?_

"Strange, where's the shrine girl when I needed her," I heard her say.

The girl wore a kind of garb which I found rather amusing. Her beret bore a star sign with a fancy Chinese character on it, but the militaristic getup overall looked kind of strange, almost like a Communist Chinese girl who's stuck in a distant past associated with some Mao guy. Still, the girl seemed kind of cute, and overall there was a very Chinese-y feeling around her which didn't seem intimidating, a kinda feeling that reeks of Chinese musical instruments, for lack of a better descriptive.

"Hey, excuse me, d'you know where the shrine girl went to?"

…_Eh, she speaks English._ _On top of that she speaks with a Chinese accent to it. Miss China, perhaps?_

"Ah, sorry, I don't… quite know."  
The medium-built girl took a while to size me up. "Who are you, anyway?"  
"Err, well, I'm just an… outsider human taking lodging here," I answered, trying not to raise suspicion.

_I hoped nobody else besides the people at the Shrine knew about me. _

"An outsider human, taking lodging at the shrine? Strange, I seemed to have heard that somewhere before."

_Here's hoping you didn't, missy!_

"She was telling me she wanted to do some _taijiquan _practice the other day because even a little bit of practice seemed to aid her in flight, but now that I'm free with a rare off-day from Lady Remilia the shrine girl's nowhere to be found, goodness."

_She sure talks a lot, much like that Grin Reaper Komachi._

"Oh, I remember. Alice came to our residence and talked a bit about the 'last person' or something…"

…_Goodness, can't anyone keep their mouth __**shut**__ around these parts?!_

"…I am not the last Konpaku," I blurted out instinctively, following which I promptly realized I let out a Freudian slip.

"Wait, how did you know? I was having trouble remembering the exact word and you just said it out so… smoothly. You must be **it**!"  
_Eeek!_  
"Well, uh… yea, I was kind of _told_, too... a ha ha ha!" I laughed weakly. _Inadvertently I blew my own cover, stupid me._

The gaze from the beret girl became pretty sharp, almost too murderous and too dangerous. Then, all of a sudden, in an unprovoked fashion the girl swung a straight punch at me, and instinctively (it was almost second nature to me) I raised my right arm and deflected her blow. The unprovoked, well-struck punch was followed by an obviously well-practiced backhanded punch from her non-active left fist, and this time I just swooped low and flipped backwards before she could hit me, using my legs both as a shield and a weapon to deflect and counter the beret girl.

"What the hell, miss? I don't remember pissing you off or anything!" I protested loudly.  
"Ah, so it was true you're a fighter, as they were saying."

_Oh, god, this is not some kind of Louis Cha martial arts novel, puh-lease._ It made absolutely no sense to break stuff in the shrine just for some kind of faux-epic fight.

"Can we take this fight somewhere else, **Miss China**? It's not very nice to fight here!"

The moment I finished talking, she roared out loud and lunged after me like a madwoman, with a stronger and much, much more murderous intent, and her overall movement became a lot faster than the initial unprovoked strike. Seeing as there was no way I could convince her, I had to think of a way to quickly lure her out of the Shrine and into the open, beyond the gate-like structure, but it was horribly difficult. Once she closed up the physical distance, she began lashing out a series of unpredictable feints and strokes. Her moves were downright simple yet extremely fast, so even if I knew how to counter, the execution of the counter was totally impossible, not as far as a human is concerned.

Several times glancing blows struck my forearms so hard it felt like my shoulders were about to dislocate, and I yelped out of shock. Thankfully nothing connected with my head yet.

"I have a name," she screeched as she continued raining blows, "and that is **Hong Meiling**! Stop calling me _China_! I hate that!"

_Oh, what in twenty two heavens have I done?! It's not my bloody fault she looks like a Chinese girl!_

And then..._  
_

_To be continued…_


	5. Fight, Flight and a reunite

There was a gradual, immense surge of energy coming from the back of my head. Strangely, even though it was supposed to be something I've never come in contact with before, there was a strange sense of familiarity.

"_**Yuuji, you can trust in me."**_

I can't not recognize the voice speaking; it was literally my **own** voice. Yet, at the same time, I can't be sure if it's an **internal monologue** or a **separate entity**. Whatever it was, I felt entirely familiar with it.

"I know I can, though I still don't know who you are," I answered aloud.

The beret girl seemed to stop for a moment, thinking I was talking to her.

"_**Now's your chance, Yuuji! Feint a strong, decisive jab to the temple, unsettle her defence, then go for her upper chestbone with a straight kick."**_

I could not doubt that voice in my head, because it seemed like it was my **only** ticket out of this mess. Approaching her furious direct offense, the only way to cure it did seem to be a counter-offensive; I should've remembered all that, except I had panicked when the girl started attacking me with unfathomable speed.

True enough, the counter-offensive worked like a charm. The somewhat-predictable stroke patterns – characteristic of _taijiquan_ are the strokes that were not supposed to be as vigorous as the beret girl had been throwing about – lent me some space as I somehow managed to avoid her attack and raised a feint near her temple, which she used her left arm to deflect. As she wrangled away and tried for the roundhouse kick, however, I was able to retract my jabbing arm sufficiently, and I then threw all my weight onto the tip of my straight-kicking right foot. The satisfying feeling of crashing my feet into the girl's chestbone, however, was soon met by an even more ferocious counter as she started pulling on my right ankle the instant the foot connected with the chest.

_That, normally and rationally speaking, is an inhumane feat._

"_**Twist out and feint a face-kick!"**_

As I yelped and allowed her to pull myself forward, I twisted along with motion, and feinted a kick to her face. Thankfully I did; I noticed a raised fist which was about to connect with my procreation tool, in the moment I saw her trying to smack me down hard. Instead, she covered her face with her right shoulder, allowing me time to twist my right ankle out of her grasp and somersault away from her.

"_**Turn around, and run into the Forest!"  
**_"Huh?"

That seemed like an order to escape from this piece of chaos. Just as I was deliberating on the decision, I noticed that the beret girl, who must've been furious with rage, had completely lost her marbles; she began to sprint towards me, howling and screeching like a maniac.

"_**RUN FOR IT, DAMMIT YUUJI!"**_

Given that it took me a lot just to get away from her, I decided to take the voice in my head for real, and started a frantic sprint towards the forest without looking back.

_I don't wanna die young!_

***

"Man, how long can I keep this up?" I asked myself as I ran deeper and deeper into the depths of the Forest. With nobody I knew in sight and civilization becoming more and more a distant memory, a chill struck me.

_For the first time in my twenty years of life, I felt truly, despairingly, and hopelessly alone._ The scary thought of being in a place I have never known of, and with no reasonable means to request for help (gawd, even language is a barrier now that I'm stuck in the Far East, the Orient), it all became too much. Still, I somehow found an inner resolve to keep my nerves steady.

_As long as I am alive, there's still something I could do._

It was when I had finally found some inner resolve to do something about myself that I felt a heavy, excruciatingly painful slam into my chest. I hadn't even realized that until I saw a green, hairy creature attempt to headbutt me, but by the time I realized I was a heap of mess sprawled on the forest floor, cicadas ringing in my head and making it all the more painful.

"_Oh, look, it's a human."  
"Looks kinda cute, he's an outsider human perhaps? Seems like eating him's a waste."  
"I'm famished. I couldn't be bothered. Let's just stew him and eat him up, what'd you say?"_

Clasping my stomach in pain, I couldn't tell anything but the pain, but I willed myself to break out of the pain and stand up. As I stood up, I tried to rationalize my own options, but was confident that none would work out the way I wanted them to. In a short period of time I assessed my conditions; a pack of three little monsters with the ability to quickly fly and headbutt their targets, which would be easy to avoid if in a wide-open area, but given their camouflaging abilities in the midst of an equally green forest, it was hard to tell if they want to spring out of a bush, a tree, or a rock.

_I'm near totally screwed._

"_**Yuuji, I will act as your look out."**_

_The voice, again, whatever it is this voice has become, quite literally, my voice of reason._

"_**Careful of these blood forest elves, Yuuji. They are capable of far more than mere headbutts, their talon fingers are very sharp and can act like claws.**_

_I could only rely on my reflexes, then._

A gut instinct told me they had already begun to move; indeed, where they were just moments ago was now an empty spot of grass.

"_**Yuuji, to your right! More to your back!"**_

As I turned around, the elf was within striking distance, lurching himself to head level as he raised a swift, miniature figure towards me. I feinted a left kick towards its face, and quickly swerved aside and launched my right leg high and looped it around its back. My swerving motion was quick enough to avoid two other elves as I heard a slicing sound, and of them squealing away in pain.

"_**Lucky you, Yuuji, they headbutted each other and plunged their claws into themselves."**_

_Ah, now I see. _With the three elves stricken by the combined efforts of myself and the voice in my head, I scrambled away before they could recover their senses enough to spot my escape.

Though, for some odd reason, as the hours went by I ended up running deeper and deeper into the forest.

***

It was when the night sky turned dangerously crimson that I had no choice but to force myself to stop. I could barely see the forest road ahead of me, but I had to keep walking. I realized that the less I looked lost and helpless, the more chances I would have at getting out of this mess alive.

"_**Yuuji, I hear something."**_

_You did? _By now, I'd completely considered this voice as a second guiding voice, though I still have no freaking idea how it was possible that I could quite literally think to myself and still get a feasible response.

"_**Pretty close. I can sense it around us."**_

Then a chilling thought struck upon me that I might be becoming blind, as the forest road ahead suddenly turned dark. _Shit, what the hell happened?_

"_**Night blindness, Yuuji, but the Konpaku are not naturally night-blind."**_

_Yea, well, tell me why not?!_

"_**Because you have me, and all Konpaku people have a double. If your physical body can't see, you still have me as guidance."**_

_Handy. Well, guide me outta this – hm? _At that moment, I heard a rustling within the woods, and then I felt a hand grabbing on my wrist. Almost as if the hand was guiding me somewhere in the total darkness before me.

_Hey, man, is this totally all right?_

"_**I don't know. Whoever had your hand seems to mean no harm. I'll ask you to scoot away at the first sign of trouble."**_

_Great suggestion, had it not been for the fact that I'm night blind...  
_

***

"_Here ye--- I've got a little statement to make, as a little sparrow;  
I'm not just a little bird, I'm a bird without a care in the world;  
I lead men to the right path, o the right path;  
the right path that don't lead birds to tables---"_

**_Will she stop singing already, god dammit?!_**

As it turns out, I was eventually led to a little roadside stall of sorts that sells some grilled stuff; seems like chicken meat, but it tasted squishier and chewier than chicken meat. I felt kind of hungry, and realizing that since mobile phones meant little to nothing to people in this world, there was no point in keeping it with me (I know I will regret this later), so I bartered with the cook – apparently also the stall-owner – for about fifteen large sticks worth of those grilled stuff. I haven't eaten since I started running away, which meant I totally skipped lunch.

How I managed to get that bartered was a surprise to myself – I don't actually know what she tried to speak, since apparently not everyone knows the so-called "devil's tongue", so all I did was flail my arms helplessly with gestures.

"_**Yuuji, you seem to have some trouble speaking in the local tongue?"  
**__Thanks, mate, I've had that problem since I came here. That does remind me about something, though. Exactly what are you?_

"_**I am you, Yuuji. And you are me. We are related."  
**__Then how the hell was it ever possible that I never knew of your existence until today?!_

"_**I don't claim to know, either. All I know is, what you know becomes what I know, and what I know is a little more than you because I've been left behind by you since young."  
**__I left you behind since… we were young?_

"_**Until Myon shows up, I doubt we can get this cleared up too soon. But perhaps you can try learning some of the basics to get by until we go to Miss Yagakoro's residence."**_

I looked around myself, and not surprisingly I couldn't understand everyone else. I could really use that.

"_**Repeat after me, Yuuji. **__**Hello, my name is Konpaku Yuuji.**__**"  
**__Uhh, can't we do something a little simpler? And I can feel it, so stop calling me Yuuji because that's a name I'm so unfamiliar with!_

"… _**Hello, my name is Pasonia.**__**"  
**_"H…hello, my… my name is Pa…Pasonia."

"_Oh, hi there mister!"_ The shop-owner responded as though she was chirping, much like a bird. _"My name's Mystia, Mystia Lorelei! How'd you do?"_

"…**now I know why YOU went blind. This is the night-blind mischief sparrow, Mystia Lorelei-**_**san**_**! I should've gotten that figured out earlier, god dammit…"**

_Dammit, you, I need more to follow up. Try "do you know where is the nearest civilization" will ya?_

"_**Sure… this is going to be a long night, I swear…"  
**__Ditto._

_*** _

After a long, tiring and dreary conversation that involved a lot of Miss Lorelei's rage at grilled birds (apparently it was a local delicacy) I finally got the information I wanted – turns out, a certain Human Village is a mere half-a-kilo from here – though I sense Miss Lorelei might be a bit guarded in the way she spoke. When at last I walked away from her stall on the second day without any more night blindness shtick, I realized that the effect wore off from me much faster than that on other people because of my heritage as a Konpaku… whatever that meant. It means a lot when I clearly saw people still stumbling out of the stalls until Miss Lorelei waved her hand, upon which the people gradually stopped stumbling out.

"_**She's at it quite a number of times. I remember Myon telling me she and Youmu were frustrated by Lorelei on a certain night of emergency several years ago, and proceeded to smack the bird out of their way before she could even chirp about it."  
**__Likely she's just trying to get business. I woe for my mobile phone._

"_**Don't worry, she won't be able to use it anyway. At most it ends up at the Kourindou, and then you can try to get it back."  
**__Likely if it weren't for the fact that I ran out without anything on me at all. Say, if I'd been away from you, how'd you know me?_

"_**The ghost half is always attached to the living half. Even if you didn't come in through the Hakurei Border and end up coming in from the Sanzu River, I know I can still find you within a week given that the border between the Netherworld and Gensokyo is rather thin. I found you the night you and Ibuki-sama were looking for Mima-sama, but I didn't have the chance to get into you until you came under a state of emergency."  
**__No shittin' me, eh. If it weren't for you, I'd be dead._

"_**If you're dead, then we'll become one singular entity. But that's not how a Konpaku should end up."  
**__Word. Any suggestions for now… uhh, what's your name?_

"_**By default, I am you."  
**__That sure as heck won't do, that'll be like calling myself. Tell you what, you call me Pasonia, and I call you Yuuji. That makes things a lot clearer. Since we share a body, we can be referred by either name._

"_**That works for me… uhh.. Pasonya…"  
**__Too much focus on the "ia". Whatever works for you. Since you've been here for long, teach me the language. I will really need the help I can get._

"_**I think you call the language Japanese, right? I didn't know the common tongue had a name."  
**__Likely because of whatever border that nearly got me killed. Say, you have any idea who the Ghost Princess is?_

"_**Yuyuko-sama? Certainly I know her. In fact, she was the one who told me to get to you as soon as possible. She had important matters for us, apparently, but when I asked she said nothing more about it."  
**__That's the friggin' same thing everyone tells me._

Before long, my 'dialogue' ended as the outlines of a village became clearer and clearer. Road signs indicated some characters I didn't understand initially, but later on it became clearer to my eyes.

"Whoa. What the… I can roughly read the words now."  
_The Humans' Village, uhh… 4 something… what the hell is that word beside the number?_

"_**A cho… this is approximately the distance from the large gate thing that is the torii, to the back of the Hakurei Shrine."  
**__This means we're not far away, huh. Let's hurry it up._

***

The village was what it says it is – a village, nothing more, but nothing less either. It was definitely larger than the Hakurei Shrine, and certainly looks more the busy for that. In fact, were it not for the fact that it looked much different from one of those traditional streets of Japan that I saw in that brochure, I would most certainly have mistaken myself as being back in the mainland.

"Sir, a penny for your thoughts?"

I turned around and nearly bolted when I saw two horns – Suika!

"Whoa! How'd **you** manage to track me down?"

Suika pointed to a rather familiar person behind me – the shop-owner from earlier, Miss Lorelei! Apparently the stall-owner looked a lot for the worse with frazzled hair and such.

"You manhandled her," I deadpanned.  
"I spent quite a while tracking you. You really did piss Meiling off, I guess, plus you managed to defeat three blood elves in the Forest of Magic. You really don't need that much hand-holding anymore, eh?"

"How the heck did you know all that, Miss Ibuki?!"

Suika just smiled. "Well, while you ran Alice saw you heading down into the Forest to the south. When I got there I saw the blood elves, two concussed and one injured. Any further down and it'll be this little bird's roadside stall. Her chirping caused me a tad of annoyance so, you know, I just accosted her a little."

_A little… indeed._ That sure didn't looked like a little scuffle, given the torn clothing and the scratches on her face._  
__**"Indeed."**_

"In any case, since we've found you, you're going all the way back to the Shrine."  
"You're not for real!" I protested. It took me a full day to get to the roadside stall and then to this village. There was no way I was going to walk all the damn way back!

"I didn't ask you to **walk** back. We can all **fly **back to it now."  
"Say what?" I didn't remember I could fly, unless she regarded the sprint down the forest as flight. But that was a situation of _fight or flight_, and **that** doesn't count as flying!

"_**She may be making sense though. We can try flying."  
**__Not you too. What on earth is making everyone think I can fly?  
__**"Pasonya, start running now. I believe we should be able to fly now that we're together!"  
**__Huh? Run?_

It wasn't like I could resist it, but I started sprinting down the village road at an inhumane speed _involuntarily_ – Usain Bolt, here I come! – and then, out of sheer instinct I found an elevation point which was actually some poor folk's roadside stall canopy, and in one leap I hopped right onto it. Carrying that momentum I flung my body upwards, hoping for the worst as I felt gravity's sharp pull. Then, just as sudden as I felt gravity, the feeling was all gone and I found myself in the same leaping position I was in earlier.

Only thing was, the leap was grossly mistimed; there was a large signboard right in front of me before I knew it, and---

**SLAM!!!**

I smacked the large wooden signboard with all four limbs spread out.

Now I can fully understand how that fly at my home felt when I finally nailed it with the swat. It must hurt.

"_**Ouch."  
**__Ouch._

"_Ouch."  
"Yeouch."  
"Damned ouch."_

***

"Oh jeez, how did this turn out like a comedy?" I groaned, still pretty dazed by the wall-smack. I sported a comically large bruise to my left cheek, the result of turning my head sideways during impact.  
"Looks like you're a natural sucker," giggled Suika. "I haven't seen someone in-flight slam their body into something with such force, ever since Cirno the Ice Fairy smacked full force into the leg of the grandpappy of all frogs. The villagers are considering if they want to turn that damaged signboard into some kind of tourist attraction, last I heard."

_If it actually helps their economy… I don't mind at all._

"In any case, this run down the forest was not without reward," I remarked. "As incredible as it sounds, I now have a twin in my **head**."

"_**Way to go, Pasonya!"  
**__It's Pasonia... without the weird stress on the last syllable._

"A twin in your head? Sounds like a Konpaku thing for sure," blurted Suika amidst gurgles of sake from that same old gourd. "I was about to look for you to tell you that we're on our way to look for Eirin."

"Eirin… uhh, refresh my memory again." I seem to remember that this name popped up at the Kourindou store, that store with my all-time favorite Sennheisers.

"Miss Eirin Yagakoro, the Miracle Healer. We're to go there to cure your language problem."

_Cure _a language problem? That sounds good. "When do we set off to her place, then?"  
"It was supposed to be today, until I heard Meiling scream her ass off about getting beaten in a martial art contest with a human. Looks like we all gotta wait two more days for our next chance, then. In the meanwhile, you might consider going back to school for a day or something; the principal of the human village school apparently teaches **everything** at the school, including the devil's tongue.

"One heck of a busy principal," I mused. "Where is she?"

_To be continued..._


	6. Measure of Worthiness

So it was me on a crutch, dragging myself so unceremoniously through this rather ancient-styled kind of "school". I ended up on a crutch because the fall I got from the incident earlier had dislocated my left foot, and there's no ignoring a dislocation whenever touching it makes me scream.

I get this vibe that the Asian side of matters, even for schooling, are intentionally drab if only because they didn't want all those unnecessary attention things, and that must've been an inferiority complex stemming from their utmost love towards a leading figure; in the Orient's case it's usually their emperors and kings. Across the building, I could hear children rambling off lines in Japanese almost in unison, so I figured it was some kind of textbook thing they're supposed to learn.

Guess stuff like diction never goes away, huh...

_"If you'd excuse me, sire, wandering parents are not allowed inside the study halls," _spoke a lady wearing a rather odd kind of cap.  
It definitely looked a lot smaller than what that crazy-ass Miss China wore, but perhaps it was her large head that made the hat look real small.

"Uhh... sorry, I still don't speak that much Japanese. _Konnichiwa._"  
"Ah, one of the devil tongues," she muttered. "Are you an outsider?"

_Outsider, huh. I can't tell anymore._ "I can't really tell, but it's a long story explaining anyway."

"You're a curiosity indeed," she cooed. "My name is Kamishirasawa Keine, but you can just call me Keine."

_I seem to recall that the word meant "no" in another language... uhh.. that's it. _"Keine? Nein? That sounds pretty German. Your English name is literally 'no'?"  
"You're a humorous one, indeed," she chortled, "but no, my name is to be read in a different manner from whatever other languages. You really are an outsider, then..."  
"Seriously, are 'outsiders' so much of an attraction to this world? Grab and pluck anyone from the outside and you get one, me figures," I quipped.  
"The fact that people are interested in Gensokyo, or get dragged into it in the first place... these alone make for interesting newspaper articles," smiled Keine. "I'm the principal of this school, by the way."

_**"One devil of a lady herself too..."**_

_I guess. _"Just wondering though, what does come out of all these learning? With all due respect, I've only seen one other group of humans and that's the household of the Child of Myare... or something."

"It's up to the children. Of every batch that graduates at twelve, two of ten students go to the Kirisame House of Higher Magicks to learn magic, and the rest are scattered between ten different fields like agriculture, linguistic, historical learnings, or even journalism under the crow tengu's numerous newspaper publications. Every child has the right to aspire for the betterment of self or others in their own unique ways. Sometimes, the youkai bring their offspring here to study, but we have to segregate them in physical--"

"Whoa, whoa, I get the drift," I interjected. "So this is an all-purpose school, I'd guess. Like a combination of elementary and middle school."

"You may say so. Say, you have free time for a couple of days, maybe a week?"

I looked around for Suika, and saw nobody. "I guess. It's not that I am about to pack and leave in a few days. But if you're gonna ask me to teach, I absolutely suck at anything but martial arts."

"Why, that'll work just fine! Could you stand in as our physical instruction teacher for the next few days?" Her voice was totally sharp, totally expecting me to say yes, I swear.

"WHAT? I have a broken foot and I don't even know the language! How the hell do I---"

"It's fine! I'll just encourage the children to speak in the devil's tongue! The students don't get active exposure to the language and end up floundering when they get employed at the Devils' mansion anyway, so you'll have to give them the exposure they need."

_**"Uhh... what just happened, Pasonya?"**_

_Beats me, how the hell should I know someone wants me to be their P.E. instructor out of the blue?!_

"T-Then what about your own teachers and instructors?"  
"Well, Mizuki's gone out hunting for the week, and Satoyama's injured his right arm when a timber fell on it. That's why we're short of a physical instruction teacher."  
"Don't you have a... curry-cue-lem or something like that, for this sorta thing? Like, something for me to follow up on."  
"You mean a 'curriculum'? We do have one here, just not for physical instruction. The two teachers are the sports type, though. Do you know what Kemari is, by the way?"

She pointed me towards the courtyard, in the direction of a ball that looked rather peculiar, but nonetheless it **is **a ball. Its material seems to be of a form of sturdy wood, but it sure was light. It was rather reminiscent of a time when I played soccer with friends in the abandoned parking lot. Without thinking of much, I flipped the ball into the air with my active right foot and started to balance it, to which Miss Keine did nothing but clap all the way.

Then it dawned on me like a sledgehammer smacked right in my head, just as I was amusing Keine with skills on the ball which I honed from years of playing street soccer. I knew I didn't want to go back to that place I once called the "real world", just maybe stay in this little place and settle down for the rest of my life, which by any conservative estimate seems to be upwards of three hundred years.

**_"But neither you and I knew what's in this for us."_**

_Indeed. Back in that world, I am somebody. _I started to miss the days where my skills at the arena made for excellent morning discussions by mixed martial arts enthusiasts, where my fists sometimes got people talking when I know they're clamming up about something I shouldn't know, and so much more. Here, I get a strong feeling that even if I do so much as attempt a kick, I will have to analyse every inch of my opponent to even try getting one shred of advantage from attacking opponents. Indeed, the only fistfights I've been in have been lucky escapes, but while people still have their interest in me as an outsider, I get this strong feeling that I really should at least do something... either to reciprocate the assistance, or to actually affect this world somehow. That, and the nagging issue of being the "last male Konpaku"... what was it with this lady Yuyuko or something that made her want me to visit her?

"...sir... sir? I need your name, sir."

"Paso---"**_  
"Konpaku Yuuji!"_**  
"Paso-**KON**!"  
"Hn? You said Paso-kon or something, did I hear wrong?"  
"Ah no, uhh, I mean, Konpa, wait, no, **Pasonia**, that's it! Pasonia Seltia Keros is the name."

It was all that voice-in-my-head's fault I got my own name so wrong, as the lady gave me a weird, blank stare hearing me struggling to get my own name out of my larynx. _What the hell were you thinking?_

_**"Sorry, couldn't help it! We *are* one half each of Konpaku Yuuji anyway."**_

***

The boss, I could tell, didn't really like that clak-clak-clak that my makeshift crutch made, but Keine had paid him a week's rent at the inn in advance on my behalf, in exchange for me going back to "school" to teach kids stuff you can do on a crutch or something. I couldn't be bothered by that enough to say _gomenasai _to him. Almost like back at the Shrine, I opened the door and instinctively avoided Suika's horns from impaling my face with a sharp body swerve to the left.

"Oh, you're back."  
"Yea, I am. You almost impaled me."  
"Couldn't help it, sorry. Accidents do happen."

***

"So what's on your mind today?"

That was the first thing Suika asked me, as once again we shared a single gourd of sake under the moonlight, right outside the inn.

"What do you mean, _what's on my mind_, Suika?" I replied, trying to figure out how she actually managed to read my head. I didn't know she was that much of a clairvoyant.

"I saw you and Keine talking today, then you drifting into your own wonderland while she spoke about your duties as a teacher. She had that tendency to rattle off right off the bat once she begins to talk, or at least any youkai worth respect would have already known, so anyone who could actually drift off in the middle of Keine's speech had to be really bothered by something."

"I just realised I am a total nobody here, Suika," I admitted, if only because she is the only person I can fully trust in the whole of this Gensokyo. "The best thing an adult can get today, in this world, just happened to me."  
"What'd you mean?"  
"I got myself a job. If this goes on my next step is get married and have half-kids or three-quarter kids."

"Welcome to reality, kid," she cooed. "Most humans are nobody here, and most babies are nobody here. But you're an oversized baby, and you got Meiling riled up so bad she nearly tore the Shrine apart, so take that as your positives."

"I'm not looking for that sort of positive, Suika... If that can be counted as a positive, I'm probably going to try suicide."

I could tell she was faking a frown at me. "Then how positive do you want to be?"

"I want to be someone who can actually speak his own mind freely and stuff. But I get this feeling that even if I do start talking about my own history and stuff, people are gonna drop off, or they can't understand me, or they can't emphathise with me or protest against my decisions. The basic issue is, everyone only appreciates the fact that I'm an **outsider**, and either I had been blind or I've just awakened to the idea that the term _'outsiders'_ always tended to mean _'temporary, useless people'_."

"Welcome to reality again, kid. Given you, I doubt you want to be a useless person either."

"Totally. But with me on crutches... and for how long I'm not very clear... I'm as good as useless."

"We can begin by talking about yourself," Suika suggested. I was quite resistant to the idea.

"Myself, Suika... Well, to be honest, I was probably no more than a hooligan some ten years ago. Street kid, smoking, hanging out with what the people in armchairs and on newspaper forums say is the **wrong** crowd."

"It's all relative," Suika quipped, "but not that I'd care that much."

"The only reason I continued to exist in that world I considered **real**... was because everyone else were subscribing to dogmatic lives. I wanted to live a little **differently **from them, not so much that they would totally outcast me, but deep down I never felt like getting close to them. It's the same in people from all over the world, rural or urban. The poor dream of a life led by the middle class, the middle class wants to be high class, the high class wants to be luxurious, and the select few rich nuts in the world do nothing but torture the rest of the classes in whatever manner they see fit. I got really sick of it, but still, I'm in that reality. I had no real parents in my life, they were at least legally dead by the time I grew up enough to understand what death is. I scrimped, I saved, I grabbed hotdogs from stands from goodness knows how many times, beaten up half-dead by stallowners or their shallow hoodlum friends about once a week, until I met Mr. Andersonn."

"Who's that?"

"He's my class teacher when I was Grade Three. He taught me a lot, and he too disliked the world. I think I saw him as a father, he took that place where a figure of a father once stood empty, and till today it still is. Sadly, good shit didn't last too long."

"What happened?"

"That year, he was transferred to Columbine High School to teach; they say that he's good enough for a high school if he can counsel kids like myself. I remembered he told me the day before he transferred school: 'Son, this might be the last time I see you. I ain't got a good feeling when I move from place to place in this effed-up world, and I might just get shot and you'll see me in a grave real soon.' I was pushing him away thinking he was joking; I still remembered when it happened it was late Winter, and I was like 'Mr. Andersonn's gotta be kidding me, I'll see you on the flip side during vacation.' Turns out that last meeting with him was really our last meeting for this wretched lifetime of mine."

"So what happened to him at the end, really?"

"Late April that year, he got shot dead... By two crazy kids, no less. He was freshier than a freshie at the school, I heard, and was actually making friends with the general student crowd, with teachers these days you don't actually get that a lot. I have had a fantastic teacher and I was immensely proud of his existence. But those two kids made him no more with guns that don't have a sense of right and wrong, that always sought a blame that wasn't the person who wielded the guns."

"If he's as fantastic as you said he was, I'd try asking Shikieiki about it, but go on."

"After I attended his funeral all alone - technically speaking, not alone, since there was a mass procession for all victims at once, but, dare I say, I'm the only kid who can count at that time - I began to take to a life on the **easy **side, easy if only because it's easier to escape than to face whatever's in front of me. Not so much of bullying, but to do all the dangerous stuff that parents in normal families will keep their children out of, like weed, like **smoking**, and **brawls**, even **substance abuse**. It took me about three, four years maybe, before I found the next most important person in my life: My martial arts coach."

"Coach?"

"I remember the first time I met him I was high on weed and he tossed me full-powered into a wall. He nearly broke my spine for that. He was one of those traditional Oriental guys, always with a cigar in his mouth, but he was proud of a philosophy he calls a "constant connect with sanity". He never was as great as Mr. Andersonn because of his stuck-up old-man attitude, but other than Mr. Andersonn, nobody else talking within my earshot actually made sense, as though they're just regurgitating lines without thought because the lines are cool and off a movie, or something. More importantly, his existence triggered in me a sense to improve myself. I still retain bad habits, I occasionally still punch a wall at full might if I'm really pissed, but at least through him I now know that I could re-channel that into something else other than a wall. It was through him that I stopped blaming people for the plight I'm in, but that said I still disagree with the general dogmatic attitude and contentment of society at the things that didn't matter the most."

"You do have some pretty originality to yourself, then. Most of the people who arrived from the outside world usually wanted to go back ASAP. Compared to them, you're actually adapting pretty well. Why so hard on yourself, take a step back and relax."

"But I am billed as the 'last male Konpaku'. Other than possibly carrying on this precious lineage, do I still have any more use? I did not want to be seen as a person whose sole role for hundreds of years is to produce offspring, that would certainly suck as a potential resume."

I belched deep from the gourd again. "Can't we get to this Hagukyaku---"

I was promptly horn-slapped by the horned girl before I could finish the last syllable.

"You mean Hakugyokurou. Call it the White Jade Tower if you're still struggling with our language."

"Ours? Theirs? Who invented the Japanese language anyway? English is called the devil's language, but is it really that? How about Chinese? How about Korean? How about the hundred-odd languages in the world, Suika?"

"You're drunk. Your words don't even make any sense any more."

I thought of her words for a while, and then I agreed with her. "You're right. I'm dead tired. I don't know what to do anymore. Guess I'll take it all one day at a time."

Slowly, but surely, I feel myself drifting off to sleep. Any surface to lay my weary head then seemed to be heaven, it didn't matter where.

***

_"Why are we leaving?"  
"I can't stand the sight of that pompous bastard Youki any more. I'll much rather move out than ever see him again."  
"Don't, Yousuke! Please don't! You know you cannot step out of the Hakurei Border! Yousan's already---"  
"Yousan was weak all his life! He didn't ever had the guts to stand up for the Konpaku family if his life depended on it, and all he knew was to make merry. Serves him right he was killed trying to get to the Border!"  
"But what about our son, Yuuji? Surely you wouldn't---"  
"He's coming along with me. I don't want him to come back here ever again. I would very much rather perish than be in the same world as Youki!"_

_I could feel it. There was a strong pulling sensation, almost like the one that nearly crushed me at the Border._

_Then it was rain all over._

_Then it was... Mister Rodriguez? This seems... seems like something that once happened to me... but I don't know any more. I know I am dreaming... but what if it's real..._

***

By the time I woke up again, it was aroundeight in the morning. I know this partially because I actually still had my digital watch with me from the outside, like a last connect to the outside world. Suika was nowhere to be found in the inn, so naturally I assumed she had gone away again looking for other things to do.

**_"Yuuji, so that was how it all started. Now I know why we've been apart this long."_**

_Ya don't happen to be talking about my dream? I'm somewhat surprised you can see them. I don't want to be sure of anything yet though, not at least until we reach White Jade Tower to clarify things._

_**"You have a point there..."**_

Picking up my crutch, I only had two things in mind; one is to get rid of that hangover, and two is to get to school to perform a rather farcical role of a physical education teacher. Considering I'm on crutches you'll really wonder what Miss Zero is thinking about when she hired me for the job, but it looked like the better way to spend a week than lounging around doing absolutely nothing.

**_"Nya, behind you! Suika's firing something outta her palms!"_**

Suika, suddenly and without any warning, launched a fireball at me from behind. It missed me by centimeters but totally gutted a road sign just right outside the inn, causing a few shrieks and manic screaming. I knew it wasn't the end of whatever crazy matter was at hand.

Certainly not by a long shot, judging by the girl with horns.

"It's time for me to test your mettle, kid," she smirked dangerously, as though she wouldn't be satisfied unless she took down the entire inn along with me. **"Superdense Conflagration!"**

I don't know what the "Superdense" meant, but I know **I had to get out of there** before the "Conflagration" hit me.

_To be continued..._


	7. Discoveries

"Yes, yes, like this. One, two, one, two, step to the left and roll around."

Physical Education has just turned into Dance Class, mostly because three visiting girls with musical instruments insisted that I teach the children how to dance instead of just plain physical exercise. I did try to protest, but when my ghostly brother told me more about the girls and their shadowy-looking feet, I decided not to resist that much.

The Inn, well, it's pretty much burnt down, destroyed thanks to Suika's willfulness earlier in the week with her very, **very** large fireball. I barely managed to scrape out, and that was solely because I suddenly felt an energy surge to my working right feet (sole-ly, if you will!) which I used to hop and leap off a wall facing the outside seconds before the conflagration hit me. It was pretty unpleasant crashing into the candy stall right outside the inn - I was left picking ants off myself for three straight hours after because of all the sweet stuff that toppled over me - but at least I didn't end up being toasted by Suika.

Speaking of whom, she's pretty much left town again, and the innkeeper was furious that the horned girl had completely destroyed his inn without paying him reparations. I could feel the innkeeper there.

I had this feeling it was pretty typical of Suika, but I doubt she's going to leave the inn at that. I know for sure she is very playful, but by no means irresponsible; I'm very sure, though, that my so-called stronger-than-the-usual-outsider presence accounts for that.

"Mister Kaylosu, do you, umm, special dance… where you come from?"

_It's Keros, Keros! _But I couldn't blame the little brown-haired kid at all for not knowing how to bite the R-sound properly, since, with the exception of three _youkai_ and a human magician to date, nobody else spoke English.

"Special dance? Where did you get that idea from?"

"A very big black man… come here, he dance for us. He put his hands on floor, flip, turn. Very funny."

Black man, flips, turns… The only thing I could imagine was that some poor black kid from the States got lost in here, and did hip-hop dancing or even breakdancing for the kids. Even that sounds pretty far-fetched to me, and truth be told, I just cannot emulate it given how my left leg was injured.

"Sorry, mate. Maybe another time, I cannot do it with my foot injured."

The kid seemed a little disappointed, and ran off to join his other friends in play. I watched him frolicking with his friends, and then realized that, perhaps, I think in such complicated terms that I no longer know how to think of matters simply.

**Even if I were really just a man of brawn, I still think too much for my own sake.**

In that light, perhaps the appearance of such people as Marisa and Suika in my life was someone's way of telling me that even without thinking in complex terms, I can still live my life happily.

***

"_Kirisame-ojisan, evening."_  
After classes, the matron of the school decided she would take me to someone to speed up the recovery of my leg. Turned out to be some sort of neighbourhood sundries store, except, there are books, staffs and wands all over along with the usual things that can sufficiently be defined as "sundries".

It certainly looks like magic does run in some families around these parts.  
_"Ah, if it isn't Keine-chan! And… who's that?"_

"_Hello, pleased… to meet you, my… my name is Pasonia," _I blurted out in halting Japanese.

"_Oh, pleased to meet you too, my name's Kirisame Kojiro. Keine-chan, is this about his broken leg?"  
"Ojisan knows me best. So hurry, hurry!"_

"…_**so he said."**_

All these while, it was my ghostly side of Konpaku Yuuji that ended up translating everything that was being spoken.  
_Your translations in my head are making things a bit confusing sometimes,_ I quipped.  
_**"I'm sorry I don't have clairvoyance."**_  
"Ah - ouuuuch!"

Before I could even muster a proper response, I felt something pressing on my injured foot so hard I couldn't contain the pain, screamed so hard I thought the .

"_**Be a man and bite it! ... Was what he said."**_  
_Nicely spoken, but I am the one with the broken foot, old geezer! You didn't have to press so hard on my foot to examine my injuries!_ Despite all that I wanted to say, though, I couldn't express it properly.

"I can speak the Devil's tongue as well, if you're wondering," blurted Kojiro. "Seen quite a few these past few years."  
"Nicely spoken! You could've told me earlier, because my foot effing hurts – OUUUUUUCH!"  
"Quiet! You're disrupting my concentration!" The man sounded quite annoyed, and I could hear Keine laughing away in the background.  
"I can't help it man," I protested, "yer messin' with MY broken foot!"  
"You actually didn't bother looking for a doctor and thought you got yourself a **broken** foot? Well, young man, it is just a **slight** dislocation. I'm going to set it back in place in one go."  
"Hold on wait a minute what'd you mean by one GO-OUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCH!"

Everything turned black right afterwards. Instant knock-out without actually getting onto a ring, really.

***

"Jeez, this man sure didn't take too long to wake up. The last guy who came in here to get a bone fixed slept for three days.

First voice I hear upon lifting the heavy load off my eyelids were those of the old geezer's. It'll be an excellent day.  
_**"Yawn… At last."  
You're**__ tied to my own waking state?  
__**"Pretty much so, ever since you're back in Gensokyo that is how I'd been."**_

"Ugh… my foot… hey, it actually feels okay now." I twiddled my left toes, and they were just fine without that much pain at all. It felt excellent. "How the…?"

"Bone-setting is part of what the Kirisame does," explained Kojiro. "A pity that we have had no luck with a male offspring for the past few years; Marisa's the only precious my wife has ever conceived successfully. And our neglect of her is the only reason she treats us so coldly these days."

"I only just told you how cool you were for having fixed my injured foot," I hastily explained. I certainly don't want to be too indebted to anyone so soon.  
"Don't worry, I'm not even asking you for money. If Keine-chan asked, what more can I say? I daresay I treat her better than I do to Marisa."  
"Well, at least she's fine, sir? If that's the only thing you're worried about. I've only ever spoken to her on two separate occasions."  
"I see. Well, if you happen to see her again, tell her the old man's lookin' fer her. Then again, I guess probably not… I said the same to that shrine maiden and nothing came of it anyway."

_No, sir, you don't make me your messenger. It's sickening.  
__**"I'd remember it for you then."  
**__By all means, I'm not going to do it. Tell Marisa yourself if you're that capable._

***

"So I see Mister Keros has had a fixed foot," cooed Miss Keine as I strolled back to the school.  
"Thanks for the fix," I replied. "Now I feel great. But I suppose I've got a class to teach."  
"There's one in 2 _shichen._ I mean, uhh… four hours. Until then, would you like to attend a class yourself?"  
"Me?" I chuckled, laughing at how much time had passed since I attended a class. I did speak of making myself not so useless, but it was two years _minimum_ since I actually attended classes of any sort.

"Well, actually, I'm abusing you for this one. It's a devil's language lesson. It'll be good for a… native… or a fluent speaker to help out. I thought mine's getting a bit rusty since the Eientei incident, since that was the last time I met anyone from the Mansion."

I felt like pretending I knew what she was saying about the Mansion, but I can't lie to myself. Before I was about to ask, though…  
_**"I know."  
**__You actually do?_

"_**Word has it the mistress used some kinda magic and crossed the sea and the mountains to move their mansion to its present location near the Misty Lake. They're conversant in the language of the land but in their inner circles they speak the 'devil's language', which I'm initially surprised you know so much about. I almost thought we'd changed races from being half-ghosts to half-devils."  
**__No shit. _"How long ago was it since you last spoke to them?"  
"Let's see… the Eientei incident was at least three years ago."

_That sure accounts for the generally poor mastery of the language by the people around here. But seriously, you're askin' me to school kids in English when I flunk it that bad…_

"_**The joke's on you."**_

_Thanks for reminding me._

_***_

_Lies. She is a definite expert of the language. The real problem is that she's teaching way too advanced stuff for their age now!_

That was my initial thought after lesson time, completely appalled that she's teaching the class texts like "To Kill a Mockingbird" (does it even apply to them?!) I was reduced to just "yes" and "no" for the entire duration of the class, and as luck would have it, the same goes for the entire class of children at most half my age.

"Miss Keine…"  
"Keine will do just fine, Pasonia."  
"I mean, well… you're going way too fast with the language. How old are the kids in class? I doubt half of them are above age ten really."  
"Well, there are some youkai children in there, so there are some fifteen, sixteen year olds in there. What's the matter?"  
"The text," I protested, "even I found it hard to comprehend! Besides, isn't its content something to do more with the world at large, rather than this place?"

Keine just smiled. "You didn't know about the youkai-human wars, so it's natural that you thought it doesn't apply. The reason the Human Village is at peace for the past decade is largely thanks to this text, which I obtained from Sakuya shortly after the wars."

"The youkai-human wars? That's novel, I've never got no idea about it. Nobody told me about it."  
"Well, who'd relieve painful memories?" The rhetorical question was noticeably laced with some weight in the voice. "In any case, your class is in ten minutes. I suggest you'd better prepare for it."

"Oh, okay. It's about time too."

As I passed her, I noticed the atmosphere around us turned noticeably cold and eerie.

***

Ever since the conversation in the afternoon, I realized that once again, I've unwittingly made enemies against myself entirely because of my outspoken, brash manner. Already Keine was showing signs of slight contempt over me, though I could tell she's not as rude as the red-white in that aspect by being courteous. I twirled my improvised fork (made out of a forked tree branch I found in the open field) and twisted the noodles around it, finding it near utterly tasteless.

"_**Sometimes I'm really glad I wasn't you."**_

_I know, right? _At any rate, this can't go on. "Let's go to that sundries store."

"_**Whatever for?"**_

"It's time to get a few texts and ask a few questions."

***  
"Oh it's you from earlier, young man. Any friend to Keine is welcome!"

I nodded politely, but even before I spoke the old man already knew I wasn't there for a simple purpose as to get sundries.

"You seem to have something on your mind. Is this about that lady?"  
"Actually, yes… I was told by Keine of some war that occurred between youkai and humans."

"You say, the youkai-human wars?"  
"Yes, Mr. Kirisame, I know it sounds really sudden but I'm not in a position to make Miss Keine unhappy. Could you tell me anything about that war that hurt her?"

Mr. Kirisame sighed out loud, as though it was something he'd long wanted to share.

"Keine's parents died at the hands of the Rou Youkai, and she was nearly killed. She would have died if I wasn't there at the time, and that run from those rogues… I'll never forget that. That's why she dislikes youkai in general, and often appears to them in a cordial manner. At least it was better than ten years ago, where people in the village were guarded about the topic, pretended it didn't happen."

"That explains her behavior indeed. Looks like I really touched a raw nerve. Why'd she have youkai children amidst the crowd then, if she disliked youkai so?"  
"I don't know the answer to that. Maybe she wants to know youkai better, and attempt to clear her inner demons?" The elder Mr. Kirisame leaned towards me, making sure nobody else heard him. "She's also a youkai herself, by the way. That's why I find that pretty odd, too, that she would hate her own lineage."

"Really? No shittin' me are you?"

"I am an honest man."

"Tell me then, do you have a book called 'To Kill a Mockingbird'?"

***

I couldn't sleep that night, and my eyes were wide open even though the surroundings were pitch black.

"_**Mate, your not sleeping is going to affect me."**_

_Sorry then. I'm just horribly confused._

"_**Okay, I give up. Why don't you try an origami crane?"**_

_Paper cranes? Does that actually work on Keine?_

"_**Why ever not?"**_

_You've got to tell me how then. I'm bad at craft._

It was plainly speaking, one of the most torturous nights I have had. It wasn't because of physical pain, but the crafting of a single paper crane using newspaper pieces alone was quite a ridiculously slow process, even though it looked simple.

"How long is this going to take?" I muttered out aloud to myself, expecting a long night ahead of me.

It was at this moment that the world behind me suddenly exploded in a resounding **bang.**

"_**Nyan, watch out!"**_

I flipped over to my left, instinctively grabbed the chair and swung it upwards, striking _something_ squarely as I back-flipped out of the tatami-laden room and into the grassy open, amidst the sounds of broken vases and flipped furniture.

"_**Nyan, hostiles behind you and to your sides!"**_

Thanks to this ethereal assistant, I was able to swerve my way past the first, but had to throw myself leftwards in order to deal a straight blow to the hostile on my right. Upon contact I felt there was some kind of fur to the hostile's body; to ascertain their identities I swerved around for the closest source of light and decided to make a break for it, whilst noticing that more and more candlelight lamps were being lit in the wake of the noise.

"_**These… they're wolf youkai! The full moon tonight must've antagonised them."**_

Now's not the time to think of that, but to subdue these enemies is, frankly speaking, _impossible_. I remembered landing a blow hard enough to break a bone in the chest, but when I checked again, none of them looked fazed for one bit.

Then, just as fast as they came attacking me, they left swiftly just as well. By this time, most of the villagers were wide awake, unhappy over the noise.

"_Hey, kid, what the hell just happened?"  
"What's the ruckus about man?"  
"It's far too noisy already! Keep it down!"_

"…_**so they said."**_

"_Now's not the time to say that—"_

"What just happened, Pasonia?"

I looked around quickly; it was Miss Keine, her eyebrows apparently still creased from earlier.

"Uhh, well, it's a long story you see… umm… apparently some kinda wolf youkai. Whoa, what's with the horns on your head Miss Keine?"

"I'll explain later. _Guys, it's the wolves attacking Pasonia-san. He's a trained martial artist and so he managed to get away unharmed. Sorry for the inconvenience, I'll take him away._"

"_You've got to be kidding us… a kid took on a bunch of wolves and survived?"  
"That guy's got some moves in him, wow."  
"That's my dance teacher, Ma!"_

Soon, the grumbling noise made way for some rather discomforting, yet agreeable voice, and I noticed the villagers' spirits were somehow lifted.

"Come on, I need to talk to you now," growled Keine, who quickly whisked me away to an alleyway.

***

Miss Keine's residence was about as big as the inn itself (or what _was_ the inn before that big ball of fire), but for some reason, a place that big only housed the lady alone. The residence might not be as grandeur as that Child of Miare's, but it sure does reek of the same learned style, what with the slabs of ink, brushes, and paper and paintings.

"Green tea's all I have for now. Sorry I couldn't give you anything better."  
"That's fine enough already. What's with the horns, Miss Keine, if you'd pardon me asking?"

Miss Keine sighed. "Look at the full moon out there. That's what's causing it to pop out."

That immediately got me thinking of werewolves, but then again she isn't as furry as those youkai that tried to kill me.

"I'm a hakutaku only during the full moon. I'm sorry if I seemed particularly grumpy during the day."

"A hakutaku? What's that? Another kind of youkai?"

"Hakutakus… It's complicated, but when provoked, I may morph into something not human-like. Right now I'm still in full control of my sanity, but when I do go into a frenzy I can't even remember what I did."

I had a sneaking suspicion that she wasn't saying everything she should, but I was shoved about quite a fair bit by the wolves, so I thought it'll be better if I left it at that.

_After all, that stupid led-me-into-this-mess oni still hasn't returned from wherever she went._


	8. Yearning for the Unlikely

**Disclaimer: Due to creative freedom, I've decided to include more than the usual amount of real-life references in this story. If you are offended by references to some of the subject matter, I suggest you do not continue reading when you chance upon the subject matter and proceed to the bottom of the chapter.**

"Class will begin in three minutes."  
"Gotcha, Miss Keine."

It was three or four weeks since I entered this realm of existence known as Gensokyo, but the more I learn about this world the more confused I am. I don't really know what I'm here for, anymore. I've had enough of dealing with being unable to speak the language entirely without that me-in-my-head's assistance, so I asked Keine if it would be all right to, in exchange for three more days of physical education services, get a crash course on the language.

At the very least, I could start from the most basic level and work my way up in future. I've done it before in the field of prize-money fights, and I will do it again elsewhere.

"_**Way to go, nya!"  
**__…Are you sure this is the kind of thing we should be celebrating really?_

***

The first thing given to me in class is a list of oddly-shaped characters, which she also scribbles down in chalk. It's pretty extensive too, since the piece of paper given to me was actually double-sided, something of a rarity for this place as I've come to notice.

"This is the _kana _system of writing. There are two systems of writing: the hiragana, mostly used for sound particles and sounding of actual words, and katakana, used for objects and nouns without a hiragana equivalent. For example, your name would be written as a rough, phonetically similar but not entirely identical replication of your name in _katakana_, but my name can be written in _kanji_ and _hiragana_."

"Katana, foreign. Hirana, local."

"Kata**ka**na, hira**ga**na. Try not to get this wrong – one's a sword and the other's a writing system."

"O-okay," I stammered, somewhat surprised by her insistence.

"Your next step is to write these particles twenty times over and over. I guess you'll need at least a fountain pen for this," she remarked, handing me a pen.

This pen, upon my closer examination, nearly made me cringe. Yea, sure, I needed a fountain pen, but I had to say, giving me an Alfred Dunhill while being **that** nonchalant and casual made me cringe worse than cabbage in a hot market.  
They really don't understand the value of branding… or to be exact, they had _no way of knowing._ It was moments of realization like this that made my heart yearn for the outside world.

"What's the matter? Lack of ink?"  
"Ah no it's fine Miss Keine… I'm just thinking what a _fine_ pen this one is," I replied as casually as I could possibly be. Which, thinking back, I think my face was contorted into a weird shape because I tried _too_ hard.  
"Oh, it should be. It's lasted for ten years without breaking. It's really sturdy."

Looking at the pen itself, I wouldn't have known.

***

"If it isn't Keine's friend again—"  
"Sir, just call me Pasonia if you'd like. I'm here to ask if you've got any books in English."  
"Eng… English?"  
"The devil's language," I reminded him.  
"Oh, uhh, the same book that Keine uses for class? I also have a few grimoires in that language, but even the Devil returned this book saying it made no sense to her."  
"How about newspapers and the likes? Surely you'll have a few copies of those?"  
"Well, I just got this from the maid of the devil's household earlier today…"

_This_ refers to none other than the _International Herald Tribune_. I didn't know Akihabara and downtown areas like those sell English-language newspapers, too, though it could just be a problem of being ignorant. After all, I daresay I've stayed longer in this land than the "outside" Japan.

"Can I take a look at it?"  
"Uh, sure. I swear, though, I saw a picture of you in that."

_Likely this could really be an article of "Searching for the Missing Pasonia S. Keros". _I really meant it as a joke the last time I spoke of it, but for it to become reality is no longer a surprise to me.

'**Missing Fugitive in Japan'** was, to my utter surprise, the title that greeted me. I swore, had it not been for the titling of this article I would have just returned it back to Mr. Kirisame.

'_Pasonia Seltia Keros, known champion in the Freestyle Fighter's Circuit, is currently wanted by Interpol as part of a money laundering operation in Japan. According to sources, on the day of the arrest order, a call came from the twenty-one-year-old fighter from the Mount Fuji region; transcripts indicated he intended to return to his hometown in Los Angeles, but Japanese immigration authorities have declined to verify. According to sources, Keros is now wanted in connection with money laundering across his many fights all over the world, including London, Berlin, Bucharest and Tel Aviv, with another as-yet-unnamed accomplice. There were reports of witnesses who spotted him along Tokyo's Wangan Expressway and a nearby JSDF military base, but these were also refuted by the authorities…_'

"What… the… **hell**… is this **bullshit**?!"

"Why, what's the matter son? You don't look very well after reading the news."

"You bet I'll look good after being accused of a serious crime," I retorted. "This is ridiculous. I've never heard of any money laundering at all. My coach does bet on me via other people, but that being a case of money laundering is plain ridiculous."

"I thought betting on yourself is illegal? At least, before the Hakurei Border came up we've all called it a petty crime for you to bet on yourself in any contest."  
"Yea, but it was just my coach, not even me. I don't even know half of what this newspaper's talking about now! What money laundering?"

"I don't know how you wash money, but, well, you could try going back to the other side and clear your name, if you feel that bothered…"

"The kid's not going _**anywhere**_," went a familiar voice from behind me. Expecting to be butted by a horn, I stepped a few steps back, only to throttle myself yet again into something hard.

"It's me all right," smirked the oni. "I read the news while returning from that side with Sakuya. An idiot can tell you're just taking the fall for this."  
"But now that I'm stuck here, nobody will believe I've been here. I need to know why I got accused of this in the first place."  
"You won't be going back. Not in the near future. This is for your own good."  
"But why, Suika? I'm going to be branded a criminal forever if I hide now!"  
"This may sound unfair to you… but, you can't have the best of both worlds."

It was then that I decided that enough was enough (on hindsight, I could also say I lost my marbles).

"Suika, I appreciate all that you've helped me for. I just want to go back there."

She could hear the tone in my voice – I'm surprised she actually could, given her sometimes callous disposition – but all she said was, "nope. Not until you've seen the ghost princess."

"Then bring me to her, settle whatever needed settling, and let me get on with my **life**," I shouted at the oni, something in me finally giving way to the frustration I've held since entering this place.

"Hey, I stood stuck here for three weeks, not knowing _half the time_ what you guys are talking about, then got accused of being a criminal where I came from, I'm trying to clear my name here and you guys are getting in the way because of some stupid prophecy or legacy or whatnot. I don't appreciate it one bit. You stupid little oni made it sound fuckin' simple because you aren't the one who needed to go through this shit, but I am here and I've tolerated _long_ enough. Now that I want to go back, and you say I cannot? I just need some time to like, talk to the police, explain that it's all a mistake, that I've got records clean enough and prove to them that I'm no criminal. Whatever it is, I'm the one bearing the sad name of a criminal, and I'm bothered. I don't got no family here but the voice in my head. Can you all just royally fuck off and let me get on with my life—"

"1912, the assassination of **Duke Franz Ferdinand**; an incident viewed as the direct trigger of a major war, but was in fact an accidental act by Alice, who accidentally cast a mind-control spell on the entire group of the group Black Hand instead of her own dolls, changing them from moderates to extremists without knowing what her spell actually did. 1945, the suicide of **Hitler** from Deutschland; in actual fact nothing more than Yukari accidentally opening up a portal hole right in his stomach because she couldn't find a safer entrance point into Berlin to look for beer. Of course, nobody knew this but burned his corpse anyway; those loyal to him giving their version of events as though their words were true and the Allied forces more than willing to accept."

What made everything so freakin' ironic, was that the oni was reading all that aloud to me like dictation in an English class. At that point of time I didn't know whether to laugh or to cry, because apparently I'm being given a history lesson in the middle of my trying to convince her that I need to go back to the 'outside' real world.

"1963, the assassination of this important guy called **Kennedy**, the alleged murderer Oswald was verified by Shikieiki sometime later, as being a case of 'wrong guy, wrong time'. But what you hear in history texts of the outside world is totally otherwise. Yours is not dramatic enough to warrant a return back there. Not for now, at the very least."

"Easy for you to say, Suika, when **you're** not the one involved in any of those news," I retorted. "Get out of my way **now**!"

The oni simply smirked. "Give it your best shot."

At this point of time I've nearly lost all my reasoning. The only intact bit of my reasoning was reserved for the fighting, and this time I felt in control of my flight-run as I raised a stance near the oni within a second. However, when the punch came through I was hitting thin air and I nearly lost my balance after throwing the punch with what I reckoned was enough force to take a bull down. My reasoning immediately raced through the causes of a miss, and came up with a short but quick answer I already knew; Suika has the ability to turn into any material she desires, and the most effective to evade a punch was by turning into air.

"_**Nya, behind you!"**_

Before I could react, though, I was helplessly flung by a fast, powerful earth-based impact from behind me that knocked my breath out completely, sending me careening through the shop's back doors and into the open ground behind leaving a trail of broken splinters and damaged furniture.

I could tell, even when the strike was this powerful, that it was actually half-hearted; that sort of knock, if it had been a serious, for-the-kill move, would've already mangled me. And, of course, what Suika did only reinforced the fact that she could deal with me… _here in this realm._ But she couldn't, and wouldn't do jack shit for me outside of it.

"Pasonia, you got the message now I hope," she remarked as she tried to give me a hand.

"Yea, sure I did," I answered coldly, while (ironically) the heat over my mind made me slap her hand away. "You didn't ever regard me as a being worthy of respect to begin with! To you, I'm a mere _playtoy_ to your strength! Disparity in strength – duly acknowledged!" I hissed at her at the end of the line, baring as much teeth as I could.

"You _**are**_ thick-headed, aren't you?"

I pondered upon those angry words for a while, but quickly found an angrier answer.  
"At least back there I have friends. Got any idea what's it like stuck **without** friends to fall back on?"

The oni paused. "That's not true. Since when do I _**not**_ regard you as a friend?"

I paused at length this time. I wouldn't have survived here if not for her. But right now I'm just so pissed. I don't know what to do anymore in this world, and as is now I'm just eking out a _pathetic_ existence worse than when I was a street urchin. It's Suika's fault I got pulled into this world, but it was also to her credit that I survived it, despite having caused many "firsts" for her… and for myself, too.

I don't know whether I should appreciate being locked in a world I barely know, or who to shift any blame to. I haven't felt _this_ lost since I, well, lost my greatest teach to the shootout.

"Why aren't you talking anymore?"

That provoked a sharp spark of fire in my heart, despite me knowing in the subconscious that it's just Suika being impatient.  
"Could you just **shut the hell up** for a moment? You aren't the one in a tight spot; **I am!**"

"Young man, perhaps you should consider apologizing. That was no way to treat a lady," remarked Mr. Kirisame, a man who likewise couldn't understand my problems.  
"Yea, but ask the horned woman if she ever _considered_ herself one," I retorted. "I'm done talkin' here! I'm taking these papers back to my inn, sir."  
"Well, yea, sure…" On hindsight, I had a hunch he only allowed me to take those papers for fear of being hit, not because he was _that_ generous.

I glared at Suika, then in a moment of uncontrolled folly, swung and splashed a nearby cup of water/tea (from a nearby stall, whose keeper was too stunned to stop me) at full strength into Suika's face, then flung the glass cup close enough to hear it smash to a million pieces, then walked in the direction of the inn with a thunderstorm brewing inside my head.

"Nobody… here… understands **my** predicament!" I blasted out at the top of my larynx a good distance away from the store, knowing the onlookers would just stop and stare at me with bewildered expressions. "None of you effin' wankers know! You all are older than me by a century but you're just **older**, not one bit **wiser**!"

It was then that I felt something poke against my back. When I turned around, it was Miss Kirisame… I guess no one can miss a girl with a witch hat that large.

"I could hear you from the other end of the forest, ze. Tell me more."

"I'm not in the mood to, Miss Kirisame. If you'd excuse me, I have other things to attend to."

"Oh, really?"

***

I lied, and this girl saw through it so quickly I had to wonder if she lied often enough to see through others' lies that easily. Still, at a bustling night at the market where nobody else but Miss Kirisame knew me and the only place to drink was a watering hole (of sorts), that's the only place I could have gone in to.

"So what's the big deal, big man? I haven't seen you for ages at red-white's, ze. Something gone wrong somewhere?"

"Ever felt like a totally lonely figure?" I blurted absent-mindedly.

Marisa pondered for a moment. "Most of the time I am."

I shook my head. "No. I mean to say, if you ever felt so lonely and not knowing anything around you? Like, _you don't know where you are_, _what your purpose in a place is for_, that sort of thing."

"Now that you've mentioned it, the only time I felt like that was when I went underground looking for this cat that spewed fire, ze. Couldn't rely on any help that time – humans don't live underground – so I know the feeling kind of stinks… why?"

"Miss Kirisame, for me… it's been that way since my Day One here. I've never felt _this_ lonely and _this_ lost before. I know next to nothing about this world, with only someone's words about being a last male heir or something hanging around me. It's been weeks and I'm still not getting an answer, and no one wants to bring me to anywhere where I can resolve this effin' conundrum, and yet, when I want to go home, I am not allowed to. I have a crisis back home I need to resolve, and I need to resolve it fast!"

"Can we take this a little easy, ze? We're not near the end of the road, mate," cooed Marisa. "You're still alive, and that is what matters. Most of us are glad we're even alive these days after the last youkai incident."

"What, you're gonna tell me that your last incident involves some kind of Peter Pan flying ship shtick with girls inside like sailors and old ghosts?"

"Precisely!" The surprised reaction from Marisa made me do a double-take, nearly falling backwards on a nearby pair of drinking dudes.  
"How'd you know, mate? I don't remember red-white being that close to even talk to you in the devil's language about this incident!"

I don't know what got her that excited, but I'd assume that I struck some sort of queer lottery unwittingly. "I was actually making a wild guess about that, so cool it."

"_**You know, Nya, it actually did happen."  
**__You serious? I wasn't even paying attention to what I just said._

"Well, that's a real coincidence, then? Sure you don't know anything about Byakuren's ship?"

"Who the heck is this Byakuran, to begin with? Is he or she some thousand-year-old man or woman who got a curse from something or somebody, for some really stupid reason, and is back here for some strange reason, and then just got a sound beating by someone and built a Buddhist temple somewhere?"

"_**Nya…"  
**__What?__**  
"I think I know what the matter with you is. So stop talkin', coz you're scarin' the witch there."**_

Initially skeptical of what the other me was saying, I snapped my attention back to the table, and found the witch dropping her cup of wine rather absent-mindedly.

"Oh, shucks, what the hell," she groped. "You basically completed my narrative before I could say a word, ze."

"H-hey, I really don't know a thing, yo. I don't even know how this Byakuran or Byakuren person came about. I was just, err, guessing; yes, totally guessing it! Everything's one big, huge, _effin'_ coincidence!" By this time I was somewhat flustered, trying to convince Miss Kirisame that I wasn't some clairvoyant person.  
"You sure about that, ze?"  
"Of course I am! Jeez, that cup is rollin' over to me and your dress is soaked. Let's go somewhere a little more open and then we can get your dress dried or something."

I was about to reach into my pocket and leave some cash on the table, but the middle-aged, smiling mustached boss just smiled and waved me away, even though I gestured my insistence on leaving some cash. Eventually it was Marisa who grabbed my wrist and dragged me from the watering hole after a few words (in Japanese) with said mustached man.

"_**She said, 'it's fine, I'm dragging this idiot away'."  
**__Oh, awesome, thanks for making me feel a lot more comfortable about it._

"I think you – or a part of you – knew what I just said, so, yes, I'm dragging you away… ze," mouthed Marisa.  
"Whatever for, Miss Kirisame?"  
"Well, we can't have you spoiling your own visit to Eientei, ze. If you left the oni in such a hurry, I think she'd completely neglected to tell you that we're going to the Netherworld as soon as we visited Eientei. Since going back outside is what you want, if we decide we don't need you after all you're only gonna spend at most one or two more weeks, ze."

"You sure about that?" I was wary of this promise, not being too sure whether it's all part of an elaborate scam.

"…nope, I'm not. I'm just giving you something to expect because that's what all outside humans are fond of. You ain't no exception even though you're Youmu's relative, ze!"

_A.N.: Please drop a review, positive or negative, once you're done reading. I noticed a spike in readership but no reviews, so if you would be so kind, tell me what you think of my story. Thanks!_


	9. Bunnies! Technology! Eientei!

So it was three more days in the village that I taught those school-children basic stances (the forward stance from aikido seems to be the easiest to teach, since the other stances taught to me were more physical and complex to master). I'd barely finished teaching the children (in somewhat less halting Japanese than a few weeks ago) how to strike a stance and perform forward rolls, when I spotted that unmistakable large hat.

"Hey, outsider boy, check your vest pocket," she snickered. I checked as requested, and realized that the pen given to me – yes, that same, expensive-as-hell yet ordinarily-treated Alfred Dunhill – was missing from my pockets. She waved it at me cheekily as she tossed it right back at me.

"I should probably call you 'thieving Marisa', I gather?" I jabbed at her a little.

"Not really, it was just simple time-space magic. Yukari's more capable in time-space stuff than I am. I'm a _combat_ magician, and she sucks at my kind of stuff."

That name seemed familiar, somehow.  
_**"Nya, it's the woman Suika was screaming her ass off to the other time, remember?"  
**__Oh, right._

"Anyway, one of the rabbits is in town for an errand now, last I checked, ze."  
"Which means what, exactly?"  
"If we could just coerce the rabbit into smuggling us into Eientei…"

The thought of coercion made me feel like a criminal, but since there is no police to nab me around these parts, I didn't hesitate.

"When do we go… _accost_ this rabbit?"

""""""

It never ceases to amaze me that in this world at least, humans and youkai can conduct free trade the way they do in Gensokyo. Since the skin color of the humans were mostly the same – come to think of it, I haven't seen a single white human folk the entire time – that did draw a weird parallel of racial harmony… except, this "racial" thingy was quite literal, species to species rather than between homo sapiens.

So it didn't surprise me anymore to see a humanoid bunny girl sporting floppy ears and wearing a simple purple one-piece, buying essential stuffs at Kirisame's sundries, without anyone batting much of an eye on her.

Looks like Miss Keine's vision from _Mockingbird _is taking off pretty well.

"There we go, the bunny girl. Let's trail her, ze."  
"Aight."

The bunny girl packed her purchases, and then – as expected of a bunny – hopped and covering large strides on her hinds, the extra length of her feet somehow disguised by the length of her dress. I controlled my sprinting – and thus tendencies to clang into such things as a billboard – by leaping and sprinting to the top of all the village buildings, shadowing the rabbit from overhead to avoid the obstacles below, while Marisa did likewise and flew on her broom – did I mention that was near-stereotypical witch behavior? – And soon we found ourselves at the outskirts of town, where a horse carriage awaited the bunny girl.

Before the horse could giddy up, I threw myself right in front of the carriage to stop it…

…While Marisa, of all inexplicable things to accomplish a mission, crashed _herself_ – body **and** broom as one – into the back of the carriage, causing said bunny girl and her horse handler companion to tumble out of the carriage comically due to the nerve-shaking jolt.

As the poor rabbits returned to their senses, they began shrieking at their loudest. I swear to the gods, I've never had to hide myself in utter embarrassment for this, but the more important thing is to now pacify a pair of surprised rabbits before we're wanted for disturbing the peace or something!

""""""

"So… so you… outsider human, want to see Yagakoro-sama?"  
"Yes. Stop shaking, we don't mean to harm you."  
_**"Really?"**_  
_Yes, really. Stop questioning me, half-ghost._

Poor bunny girl, she's totally taken by surprise by Marisa's antics. I could only frown, slightly bemused by the spectacle and the large, gaping hole at the back of the horse carriage.

"Talk about a **grand entrance**, Miss Kirisame," I joked.

"Well, I didn't know you'll throw yourself in **front**, so I jacked myself into the horse's **back**, ze!"

I didn't know how to respond to that, except by furiously tapping my head with my index. At the very least, she didn't go crazy enough to rip through the carriage, which was a good thing – I don't want to have to pay more reparations before I could actually earn anything substantial around these parts.

While handling the bunnies' scratches, I had a fleeting thought – _once I get this settled, maybe I could find myself a job as a cross-world trader or something._ I know there's quite some money to be made in this trade – all that's required is an opportunity.

"Miss… umm, _what's your name, girl_?" I swear, my Japanese is shaking less than the bunny girl now.  
"_Me? My name's… Udongein Nina. In front is my sister, Usami."  
_Interesting surname, I thought. "Alright, um, Nina, can you lead us there now? I need to see your legendary… uh … **medicine lady** urgently for personal matters; I'm an acquaintance to Suika the oni and the other shrine maiden."  
"Shrine maiden?"  
"To be exact, I'm referring to the one who wears white and red."  
"Oh, it's the Hakurei's shrine maiden. _Usami, let's go now."  
"With these people in tow? You sure that's alright, Nina?"  
"I…well, I think it's okay! They are friends to the red-white Shrine Maiden! I recognize that witch girl, too."_

I could hear "aka-shiro (red-white)" distinctly, and for unknown reasons I found myself having to stifle my laughter in the jerking motions of the carriage.

"What's the matter with you?" Marisa raised an eyebrow at me, not sure what the funny was about.  
"Ah, ha, it's nothing," I reassured Marisa. "I just suddenly found _aka-shiro_ funny. When you guys talk to me, you also refer to that shrine girl as red-white. What's the deal with that?"  
"Well, that's obvious isn't it, ze? That shrine maiden simply refuses to wear anything other than her standard red-white, and will only wear white-black when required to perform funerals. Over time, any youkai and human close to her – like myself, we've been friends for at least ten years – we call her red-white, ze."

"A shrine maiden's life is pretty sad, then," I remarked, remembering what Suika told me about a certain Mima killing everyone in that shrine, save for that shrine maiden.

"Well…" Marisa paused, presumably thinking about her own past which Suika told me about, "I do notice she's usually at her happiest and most active during, and the week immediately after incident resolutions. Although she claims to be lazy, I suspect she's just extremely lonely; there's nothing in here to excite her other than these incidents. Even I fail to understand her motives at times, and I thought I was the most clairvoyant and mysterious woman, ze."

"Is that so…" I intentionally dragged the 'so', not really taking the witch too seriously on her last statement.

"Oh, right, I forgot to ask – did you tell Keine you're coming out, ze?"  
I thought for a bit, then realized I had completely forgotten to tell Keine about this. I remembered still having more lessons to teach that same afternoon.  
"Oh, damn! What am I gonna do?"

Marisa smirked, packing me into the carriage. "Well, she could do with one less teacher! Let's go already!"

""""""

It took an entire afternoon for the horse carriage to tumble its way down a forest full of bamboo trees. If there were more fauna around these parts, perhaps the pandas would have already settled here – this is like _heaven_ to them, given the sheer volume of bamboo.

"We have had black-and-white bears in these parts way before the sealing of the Hakurei Border, but I wonder where the bears have gone to," sighed Usami. "They used to help us control the number of bamboo trees in this forest but lately, Kaguya-sama kept asking us to chop down the bamboos because they're blocking our entrance in and out."

So perhaps this _was_ a panda paradise. While thinking of the possible reasons any sane panda would've left a paradise, the horse carriage giddied to a stop.

"Welcome to Eientei," smiled Nina. "People, we have guests!"

A moment later, (yet another) girl, this time dressed in one of those traditional garbs that looked a bit more regal than those the Child of Miare wore, emerged from one of the side hall areas.

"_Guests, you say, Nina?"  
"Yes, Kaguya-sama, an outsider human and Miss Witch!"_

"_Outsider humans… what are they here for anyway. No bother – it's been a while Marisa,"_ greeted Kaguya casually as Marisa smirked in response. "This is…?"

"Evening, my name is Pasonia Seltia Keros. I have a possible other name of Konpaku Yuuji."

"I thought you looked somewhat familiar. You seem like a direct relative of that half-ghost girl Youmu, from the Netherworld."  
"Yes, it would certain seem to be so –"even though, in all honesty, I've never met this Youmu before – "Ma'am, pardon me but your name is?"  
"I am Kaguya, of the royal Houraisan-of-the-Moon lineage. You may address me as Princess Kaguya if you'd like, or Kaguya if you just want to be friends with me."

I could only smile in response at such casualness – I don't know what these women think anyway beneath all those niceties. "May I speak to this medicine lady? I need her for an urgent matter."

Kaguya stared blankly at me, and I could tell nobody has spoken to her about me in full length. Perhaps that oni lied.

"_Eirin! Did you have appointments today? There seems to be an outsider human patient!"  
"No, Princess, I don't have appointments!"_

"The medicine lady says you have no appointment with us."

"_**Hey, I could hear that, Nya!"  
**__Those were my sentiments, too._

Marisa, sensing the same as I did, quickly stepped up and gave a quick explanation of the situation. After a minute, the Princess finally got it.

"Oh, so you're here looking for the Medicine of Languages! Eirin, can you give me a vial of the language meds?"

"I ran out of stock, ma'am! And why are you communicating to me in that New England tongue?"  
"Because we have an English-speaking visitor, that's why!"  
"…an English-speaking visitor?"

Moments later, a lady dressed in a blue-red checkered combo and a blue cap with the universal red cross emerged from the room. From her gait it was obvious she was walking towards me.

"Are you Mister Konpaku? I recall the oni came here looking for me several days ago about your problem."  
"That'd be Suika, Miss…?"  
"Eirin. Yagakoro Eirin. I don't really bother how you address me. Anyway, yes, that was the oni that came looking for me about three, four days ago."

I didn't really know how to respond to that. Memories of that splash act on her came streaming back, and I shuddered. I didn't know if it was out of guilt or something.

"…what's the matter, Pasonia? Ze, you look kind of guilty of something."  
"Me? Guilty? Who ya kiddin'? I'm just a bit tired, Miss Kirisame. Miss Yagakoro, um, you don't have any more medicine for languages?"  
"Sorry, not at all."  
"… But I thought the oni asked you?" I felt my heart drop below my willy.  
"And… **so**? Does that overbearing oni expect me to do things _just because she asks me to_? I've got my experiments to conduct as well, and you lot are in my way. Tell you what, help out here and I'll consider about the meds later, but I ain't gonna give ya any guarantees."

With that, the medicine lady retreated back to the inside of the residence, slamming the wooden door hard.

"Well, I apologise for her rude attitude," the princess smiled awkwardly. "You came in at a time when an experiment of hers went wrong. Maybe you'll like to take up residence? Eientei doesn't usually get visitors in such a… unique manner."

Right after that was said, the horse carriage behind us collapsed in a rather spectacular fashion, sending the two bunny girls running after the alarmed horsies. All I could do was laugh nervously.

"So much for trying to get things done ASAP," I droned.  
"Well, that's as far as I'll help then, ze," blurted Marisa. I struggled to remember something I was meant to tell Marisa, and then remembered it before she got on her broom.

"Er, yea, hey, Miss Kirisame! I got something to tell ya."  
"You like me?" She smirked, obviously kidding.  
"Nah, I already have someone else, but more than that – one fine day your dad told me he's lookin' for you. He told me that the day after he fixed my foot."

Marisa paused for a moment, saying "I'll give that a thought" before finally taking off into the evening sky on her broom.

""""""

Taking up residence in this household reeks of that nagging but warm feeling of familiarity, somehow. On the outside this Eientei seemed like your typical household, but the innards of this household is actually quite techie with something that I couldn't quite put my descriptive powers to – something beyond LCD. With bunny-like creatures springing about doing their household chores, I had the privilege of speaking to the lady of the house.

From initial observation it seems she is quite interested in the outside world, too.

"So, I see, you came from the United States. Last I've been there was for a little sojourn around the time of Kennedy, before I moved here," spoke the lady.  
"I see. But, if you do have connections to the outside world, why then…"  
"It's because Gensokyo as it is, is now the _only_ safe haven for Lunarians like me. In fact, the whole house here is updated and privy to the outside world, only because it is actually uplinked to the moon, and then we get our downlinks back to earth via tapping into their satellites…"

I could only smile wryly. "I lost you there, Miss Kaguya."

"Oh, sorry. Hmm, I guess an easier way to put it is that ever since the Internet was invented, Eientei has ceased its existence in the outside world. It's an amazing past 40 years that I'm isolated in here, I guess."

"Ah, I see. Well, I'm sorry to say that the United States post-Kennedy is nothing short of epic failure."

"I do get that sentiment from the outside world network forums I read, but you're the first person I've ever seen to explicitly mouth it out."

"Well, I have my reasons," I blurted, feeling a bit queasy about it. I hadn't told her the entire truth about being wanted by Interpol and all, but I guess with technology this advanced it's only a matter of time the lady finds out anyway… if she wants to.

"I'll try to get Eirin to push the medicines out asap, I understand you need to speak to the Princess of the Netherworld 'coz the oni said as much. In the meantime, if you want to pass your time I guess you can use my terminal."  
"What's a **terminal**, Miss Kaguya?"  
"It's what you refer to as a Personal Computer, a P.C."  
"Oh, right. But won't it be different?"  
"It wouldn't be. Lunarian terminals can interface with any existing technology and can even emulate existing human operating systems at 100% compatibility rate."  
"Sorry, I lost you again."  
"Meaning you're right at home even if you're using my terminal. If you know how to use a P.C., that's how it's gonna feel like to you."  
"Excellent news! I won't stand on ceremony then," I know I broke out into the widest grin I had for the longest time. Finally, a golden chance to leave a message to the people outside of Gensokyo and clear my name – and just a day ago I thought that was _nigh impossible!_

Talk about a convenient plot device, though.

""""""

"Okay, this is shaping up to be pretty bad," I mumbled, trying for the umpteenth time to log into my email account. "I don't know what the heck's going on, but I can't access my own email right now."

I should have guessed it coming. _Whoever's gonna set me up to take the damn fall would've also taken everything that belongs to me._ I just hope my gal is fine in L.A.

"It seems like you have a problem with the terminal, Mister Keros?"

It was the self-proclaimed Moon Princess, now dressed in a rather intricately patterned pink garb that gave off the same vibe of regal grandeur as was the case at that Child of Miare's residence.

"Ah, Miss Kaguya… umm, I'm not sure you can fix a problem of accessing emails?"

Kaguya chortled slightly. "Email… we had this TechPost tech that was phased out a few decades ago, and this email thing does look remarkably similar to TechPost. But if it's an account-access problem, then I don't know what's going on… What's the matter?"

"Well, it seems that either the network to my own inbox is faulty, or someone stole my account. I can't access my email now."

The Princess frowned slightly. "This terminal, as far as I know, doesn't disconnect from **any terminal **as long as that terminal _exists_ on a network, even if it's powered off. Do you need someone to help you retrieve messages stored inside?"

"Well, if it isn't too much trouble…"  
As had already been the modus operanti from previously, I don't want to overstay my welcome.

"How about this, Miss Kaguya – I work in the household in any posting you want to? I don't feel so good overstaying my welcome at all."  
"No, it's fine really…"  
"I insist, Miss Kaguya! I'm not a leech and I will do anything I can, in terms of labor, to justify getting assistance from anybody."

She replied my insistence with a little chortle; understandably, maybe she's carefree about things like that and might even find me a bother for asking.  
But, for me, I sure ain't gonna wait for something to happen before lamenting.

"Okay, well, I'll get Usami to find you something you can do. In return, I'll help you however I can with your little P.C. problem."

"Much appreciated, Miss Kaguya! Thank you!" I tried to sound as cheerful as I can, but somehow, out of my slightly gruffy voice it's hard to make myself sound sincere _and_ cheerful.

"Cut the pretence," she mocked, patting my shoulder. "Just kidding, aight? We Lunarians are just good at reading Earth humans' emotions, to the point of clairvoyance. I don't know what's stressing you out so much, but – relax! **Why so serious?"**

I swore I heard someone say that last line not so long ago. Was it The Joker?

""""""

The other side of the building, I swore at first sight, is a freakin' factory… of _something_. Girls with bunny ears almost seemed lined up, working on a conveyor belt that carried this mysteriously, green-light-emanating shiny stuff from within the forest.

"What the heck's this?" I queried aloud.

"This is the machine we use to pick Lunarian ether," explained Usami. "We use this to power the house's facilities and supply Eirin-sama with materials for her medicines."

"Hey," I blurted, noticing some bunnies had upright ears while others had droopy ones, "how come some of you bunnies have different ears?"

"Pointed ear bunnies like us both, came from the moon," Nina blurted. "We are servants to the Lunarians for as long as I can remember. The earth bunnies, however, are self-developed youkai who've gained human enlightenment. Too bad, though… Reisen-sama and Tei-sama are away. They might be able to give you more on the core differences."

"Let me guess – they're your bosses, and they're really powerful bunnies?"

The two bunnies stared at me wide-eyed. "How'd you know?"

"_**Nya, you did it aga – "  
**__I know. Don't remind me. I seem to have a knack for guesswork anyway._

"Sheer guesswork," I reassured them – and myself, since I am not entirely convinced that I'm a subconscious clairvoyant. "Now, can you explain what the bunnies are doing?"

"They're using their breath to activate the ether. Somehow, only bunny-breath seems to be able to activate the ether. In any case, we have a central storage – "

"Usami! It's good to see you here! We have a problem at storage area!" A bunny came bouncing towards us, clearly antsy and worried.  
"What happened?"  
"Mizuna sprained her back after colliding with Chisa. We're short of bunnies to carry the ether boxes…"

Usami swung her head at the bunny speaking, and I nodded in response, to which her entire face lit up. As I was pushed by a bunch of excited bunnies through the bamboo forest, I thought: _That's the only thing I'm good at for now, anyway. Odd jobs beat slackin' off without doing nothin'._

This work, in comparison almost feels like I'm back in my old element. At least, that's the only thing I could try to convince myself to, for now.

**I hope this ends soon.**


	10. Inquisitive Princess, Violent Encounters

And then, since that day another three days have passed. During this time, Usami returned to deliver another letter from Keine which read –

"_You owe me a week of lessons, you moron."_

Just when I was about to sigh hard, it continued –

"_I'll be wishing the best for you, in you finding 'you'. I'll really like to know if you're Konpaku Yuuji, or Pasonia. Tell me when you get back."_

_Trust women to be this sensitive and curious_, I smirked before folding the paper and going back to my supposedly back-breaking work. Must've been Suika tellin' her about my story.

In that time I've been having carrots and pork for meals. Apparently, these two are the only food served during lunchtime, and it isn't hard to see that I'm the only non-rabbit amidst a large workforce of nearly three hundred other rabbit workers… at least, I'm the only worker who walked instead of hop.

Not to mention I'm the only male around, which makes things embarrassing. In that time, though, I've still managed to chat up with a few other worker rabbits whom I thought might help me in future; besides Usami and Nina, I befriended Melos – one of only three rabbits who (not 'that') could speak English as a native tongue, and with a very distinct UK or Scottish accent – and Anisa, a particularly bulked-up and dim-witted droopy-ear bunny. They remind me of T.J. and Jack from back in the fight club, and if I ever had a chance, I swear, I'll definitely have those cool bros meet Melos and Anisa.

It's surprising that there're coincidences everywhere in this world.

""""""

"Pasonia?"

It was Princess Kaguya, handing over what looks like a net book to me over a busy lunchtime.

"Adaptive technology," she quipped. "This has a similar amount of internal power as a P.C. Your TechPost thing was accessed by someone else, and this is what I managed to retrieve out of whatever they tried to delete."

I quickly scanned through every email sent out, then noticed that someone had been sending emails through my account during my absence.

"Additionally, we found a tracer module that linked back to this user known as Zachary. You have any idea who this is?"

Of course I do. Zachary is the neighbourhood geek, the one delving into the deep ends of the Net while we fighting boys at Nordoff smack each other silly. But I didn't expect him of all persons, to be able to pull this off, given his submissive temperament.

"So… Zachary planted some sort of thing that stole my info, that scary Trojan thing like they always say in the news," I quipped. "Then, he set me up to take the fall. But what does he get out of this…"

"Should I investigate further? My tracing churned out something interesting."

My interest was piqued. "Go on, Princess."

"During my search, I noticed that the person who planted this module… received, and then withdrew a large sum of money from his bank. And there were records of him going to this… uhh… what you call a **police station** maybe? – because they noticed he's drawing money in a weird manner."

"Large sum of – oh!" It was the bit about money that made me realize his possible motivations.  
"Why of course… goodness, I remembered Mrs Dalston needed the money for her cancer treatment. I got news of it from one of the fight club buddies right before my arrival at Narita. Then again, he could've waited…"

"KAGUYA-SAMA! ROU… **ROU YOUKAI AT THE DOORS!**"  
A panting rabbit came crashing through the room, sounding extremely flustered.

"_How did they get this – __**activate the response team**__!"  
"No good, Princess! They're all knocked out! I can't get a line to __**any**__ of them!"_

The electricity to the room was suddenly cut, plunging the area into dim light.

"_They got to the main power supply!"  
"What the heck is going on in here…?"_

Before we could properly respond, the poor panting rabbit was hit by a quick-slamming door that sent the poor thing careening across the room, and it was there that I noticed those were the same creatures that attacked me back at the village. The unmistakable growling and stature…

"The wolves are here!" Kaguya shrieked a little, but I told her to stand behind. By this time, I had my nerves tingling, and my fists ready. My breath was heavy, but it was more hyped up than fearful, and that mixture of emotions kept me from going loco.

"_**Ready to fight?"  
**__I'm itching for a good punch-up for quite a while._

As the wolves went for the princess, I found myself throwing the table at the enemy (didn't really have to take much to hurl the thing at them with force), sending a couple of them sprawling on the floor as the mahogany took the mickey out of them wolfies. I then zipped right into one of the pack, using my elbow and my newfound speed as a weapon to knock him – and by proxy some half-dozen of others – back out the door. The wolves on the front were unperturbed, and in the ensuing brawl one got past me and went for the Princess, before I conveniently raised my leg to trip him and stomp his head down.

"_**It's that guy from that nigh!"**__  
"How the hell did he get __**here**__?"_

I smirked at them as they tried to recover, using numbers to ensure a one-versus-many standoff. My muscles, warmed up by several days of pure, hard labor, itched to provide power for my fists.

"You won't get past **me**," I blurted, throwing in some egoistic bravado while twisting my face into what I call that 'face your worst enemy' expression.

"No one leaves a brawl without a fracture… but **me**."  
_**"Way to go, Pasonya!"**_

Provoked, one of the wolves decided to test me as it lunged at me forcefully, and I answered by punching straight at its throat, sending him onto the ground gasping heavily for air. I gloated too soon however, and several of these humanoid wolves came up pouncing at me and pinned me to the floor, making me gasp for air as I tasted blood in my throat at the same time. I then shook off their pin-down before they could break my face, then punched one that got too close to the Princess, right back out the door.

It was then that an orb of something suddenly came flying out from the Princess's palms, and I had to dodge that before it struck me too. The wolf in the orb's way was knocked both out of breath, and right onto a nearby wall where the resulting force made a spider-web crack on the wall; the wall eventually gave way and the wolf was nowhere to be seen.

"They're not gonna play by the rules, so I don't need to follow the rules of Danmaku fights either," growled the Princess, whose expression turned as fiery as the glow of a fireball she conjured in her palms.

"What the heck is th – "

Before I could ask, three more multi-colored balls flew at the wolves. It wasn't deadly enough to kill them, but nonetheless the group that got close to us got all knocked out of their consciousness. Once that was done, the princess pulled out a knife which I swore I never knew she had, as she proceeded to stab the wolves in their chests one by one.

I've seen ultraviolence before during fight club – sometimes it just happens way too naturally – but seeing orange blood spurting out of humanoid beasties was another thing. Here, it seems that the Princess's acts were actually justified, her actions spurred out of the need to protect herself from another being not human.

I could only stand aside watching the murderous Princess take down the wolves and their lives.  
Rather helplessly and overawed.

""""""

After a while, the Rou Youkai realized that their time was up and their game was over; they beat a retreat before the rest of the rabbits could eliminate them. I had wanted to take off after them, but the Princess pulled me back.

"Princess! Are you all right?" Miss Yagakoro came running for the Princess as the princess's malevolent aura slowly faded.

"It's fine now," she quipped, the bloodied Princess dropping her dagger squarely into one of the wolves' stomach. "How's the situation out there?"

"The stasis fields have been re-activated. Someone sabotaged it, which caused the chaos inside."

She stared at me sternly, as though she'd already decided that I must have been the one doing it.

"How many of us are down?"

"The entire first response team was knocked out, and we've got about thirty more other casualties."

It was at this time that the medicine lady suddenly flew into a fit of rage, and with unexpected strength, clutched me at my throat painfully.

"Did you collude with the wolves? They seem to know _**you**_, and _**you**_ to them."  
"Lech go!" I yelped, unable to speak with my throat being clutched. I can't bring myself to hit the medicine lady, but I'm going to die if I don't do something.  
"Stop it, Eirin! He protected me while we were in here! Let him go!"  
"NO! HIS PRESENCE WAS WHY WE GOT INTO ALL THESE MESS, AND TEN FAILED TESTS IN A ROW! THIS GUY IS A FUCKING CURSE!"

It was then that I felt a surge of energy – it feels _malevolent_ and **dark**, for some reason – shoot up from my spleen area and then all over my body, and then I saw that Eirin was apparently struck; she yelped and let go of me. For a good five minutes I was down on the floor gasping for breath. Tasting yet more blood, I then noticed her grabbing at her wrist, as though _something _had burnt it.

"I don't… *cough* know what your problem is, Miss Yagakoro, but can't you tell me earlier that you don't want to see me? I'm just here to look for medicines to a language problem, *cough* I've got my own **shit** to deal with, and I am not even aware of you! Can't you blame _your_ failures on _your_ own incompetence? Can't you leave _me_ alone?"

"Stop it already, you two. Eirin, please go check on the casualties and give me a sit-rep. Mister Keros, please go back to your bunker or something… for now."

"Sorry," I blurted, before realizing that Eirin had blurted the same. This time, I felt equally justified to stare as much daggers towards that mad scientist as she does to me.

""""""

I took a look at the surroundings. To say things were flipped and messy was a **huge** understatement; a lot of glass bottles and stuff were all over the floor, hardly any one of them intact. It wasn't a pretty sight looking at some of the bunnies – blood was trickling out of some quite badly, and others are quietly nursing their injury in a corner… one of them being Melos.

"Oh, gosh, Melos, you all right?" I saw the blood trickling down the side of her face.  
"It's you, Pasonia. I'm not good at all _pyon_. Those damn wolves shoved me right onto the walls. I knocked my waist into the wall and now I'm unable to move."

I had some experience with broken bones; assuming the bunnies' body structures to be similar to human, I felt the pelvic area a bit and noticed that it was slightly dislocated. I ain't gonna mess around with this sort of business since I am not a bone-setter, so I thought I'll have the bunny brought over to the infirmary since the medicine lady must, by extension, be the in-house doctor.  
"You need me to carry you anywhere?"  
"Uhh, yea, if you'd not mine carrying the other injured first to Miss Yagakoro's. I'm sure she's treating the rest now."  
"Yea, I'll do it." I said so, rather unwillingly. Thinking of that unreasonable woman turns me inside out.

""""""

"Did anyone ask you to help? **Go away!**"

Understandably, it was the medicine lady who's over-reacting to my presence. I did what I could to ignore her, and to be honest I'm quite upset after a while, every time calling me by a different name whenever I bring a rabbit to her infirmary. Words initially used were "idiot", "fool" and "skunk", but gradually it progressed to "traitor", "bastard", "devil" and then still yet later, after nearly three hours of carrying injured rabbits she came up with "malevolent leech" and more colorful phrases that were either too dirty to go to print, or too bombastic for me to remember.

"Is she always like that?" I queried Melos.

"She's not always like that _pyon_," replied the injured rabbit, who by then had something like a brace attached to her waist; apparently it was a slightly dislocated backbone. "In fact, she's mighty jumpy today."

"Might be the time of the month," I quipped loud enough for her to hear, but not close enough for her to retaliate, as the both of us trotted out of the infirmary section.

"Eh, just so you know, she's jumpy whenever shit happens. Though, the last time I saw her as jumpy as she is now, was when we were planning to install a fake moon over the sky here so that the Rou Youkai do not disturb us anymore_ pyon_."

"Let me guess –"this time I actually knew the answer – "it's an oni by the name of Suika who broke it?"

"Eh? How did you know—"

"Well, that oni told me quite a long time ago that she broke a fake moon. The two facts add up."

"Uwah… to be in the company of a legendary youkai like Suika-sama is already something us rabbits want so much_ pyon_. It seems like they've got so much we can glean from if we even get just a little bit closer, if at all."

"I'm not sure about you, Melos," I laughed nervously, thinking of the crazy things that Suika did that I saw happen before my eyes. "But, whatever did you mean by '**legendary'**?"

"Every so often, there would be incidents – such as our encounters with the Rou Youkai, these are considered incidents. When an incident is known to be outside of the youkai's ability or care to intervene – this generally meaning something that is on a scale that even legendary youkai can't do alone— the Shrine Maiden of Hakurei will appear alongside that witch our mistress doesn't really like too much_ pyon_. We have systematic records here, just for our own perusal to while our time. Like, several years before there was the Mist Incident, which involved the devils and which is why we now call this language the devil's language as a matter of habit_ pyon_. Then our own actions became an incident when the Shrine Maiden took us to task_ pyon_. Recently—"

"Recently, there was an unknown ghost ship with some monk in it. I was told."

"Mister Keros, can I ask a question?"  
"Sure, go ahead."  
**"Just who **_**are**_** you**_** pyon**_**?"**

_Who am I? I'd like to know that too._

""""""

Another two days passed since the Rou Youkai's invasion. In that time, I was amazed at how fast things were restored to their original state. The rabbits who weren't injured were all over Eientei, beaming this strange thing onto non-organic objects, and within seconds these objects restored themselves like little puzzle pieces jumping back in place.

"That's a pretty nifty little device," I remarked as I followed Melos and Usami around.

"We're already used to the Rou Youkai damaging things, so we had the people up top send us some restore beamers. But this remains strictly Lunarian property so don't touch it. We only got this unit."

"Got it."

"Hey, hey Mister Keros!"

It was the Princess, whose presence immediately elicited respectful bowings from the rabbits. Though, given the way she shouted across the corridor I must say she's anything but graceful at times.

"_Don't stand on ceremony girls._ I need to speak to you for a while, Mister Keros."  
"Is… anything the matter Princess?"  
"I've asked the people up top to trace the source of the money that your friend got."

_Aren't you mighty inquisitive, missus…_

"We found that the money was supplied by a certain Helston Industries. The account was a company account, but the main controller was this guy called… Anselmo Sanchez."

**Anselmo Sanchez**… it all clicked in place. His goons tried to take over the fight club to build one of his sleaze joints, but I threw them out in more ways than one; not only did I trash his men, I also took the footage of his men monkeying around the fight club right up to the fuzz.  
It made sense for him to low-blow me this way.

"…_**for him to low-blow me this way."  
**__Shut it. You're not helping at times._

"That's the basis of your circumstances right now. You got framed. Knowing that, you still wanna go back? If you ask me, you're better off staying here."

"No matter what, eventually I will have to go back," I responded.

"Sigh… typical of you outsiders to be unable to let go of whatever you had, isn't it? Then again, I understand; if something big happened back at the Moon I'll take the fastest pod back."

"I'm glad you understand," I replied.

She then pulled out a watch-like device while none of the rabbits were looking our way, and stuffed it into my pocket.

"Whoa, what the-"  
"Shush. Don't let anyone know. That is a Transporter Watch. It looks like an ordinary watch, a **G-Shock** maybe, but it actually has an option that teleports you to anywhere you know.

_Just how inquisitive are you about everything? That's the first I hear someone mention a G-shock in Gensokyo!_

"…anywhere I know?"  
"If you'd gone to the place before, just imagine the surroundings and press this button," she said, pointing to a red button on the watch. "It will scan all possibilities and even display you a list of possibilities if you need to jog your memory."  
"Sounds helpful, Princess, but…" I pointed at the other rabbits, "wouldn't they get suspicious if I disappeared just like that?"

"That's the beauty of this device. As long as you're doing whatever you need to do within ten days, you can come back within a short moment; as in **today**, so to speak. However… it doesn't go forward in time, only backwards. You also cannot use this device to show up at the same place repeatedly because that will cause a heck lot of problems with time and space. More importantly, the Moon Time Police will find out."

"Sounds pretty complicated," I mused.

"Just think of it this way – **do what you have to in one shot.**" The tone of her words was absolute.

"_**Wait a minute, Pasonya."**_  
_Oh what is it this time, jeez. _Sometimes my double fails to realize what makes me irked.  
_**"Are you fine if I wanted you to go back alone without me? I don't want to run the risk of not being able to stay with you there."**_  
_On the contrary, I'd prefer you come with me for just this once._  
_**"… Whatever you say then. We're one to begin with."**_  
_Thanks. I owe you one._

"…are you listening, Mister Keros? You spaced out for a bit there?"  
"Uh, what? Oh, uh, sorry."  
"…I could read you there."  
"With all due respect, Princess…" I droned, unhappy that I was being read into.  
"Yes, yes, I'm sorry, but I only did so because I deemed it necessary. Yes, he can go with you, but he'll only be able to stay with you for three days. I know because Youmu came here complaining before about her other half's disappearance the other time she borrowed the device, so I'd give you three days tops if you're gonna bring him along, to avoid problems."  
"Augh, that's pretty problematic… he's not going to be able to accompany me this way, whatever I do will most definitely take more than three days."  
"You half-ghost-half-humans sure have a lot of problems with the time-space continuum and our devices. It's your choice whether you want to take the risk," she mused light-heartedly, "'coz we ain't no insurance company here."

_Looks like I've got no choice then. Could you leave me for a bit… literally?  
__**"Ah well that's a shame. Sure thing…"**_

Slowly, but surely, a wave of very sharp and jolting static swept through me; before long I felt disconnected with my other half (in a literal way). It was for the first time that I saw this blue apparition the dead ringer of myself, and I was half-excited, half-nervous.

"Whoa, so you look like this… totally me?" I blurted out incredulously.  
"This is my 'you' form," he smirked. "I prefer to be in orb form, but I don't have enough energy to make it happen now," he explained. "You mightn't realize it, but even when the two of us speak like this they can't tell what we're saying. At least, I knew none of the other ghosts but I understood when Youmu-nee and Myon-nee were talking."

Sure enough, I looked to my side, and realized that the Princess didn't get a word of what we said.  
"...That's strange. You just learnt that funky new language or something? Nothing I had could decipher it," the Princess blurted, surprised that she couldn't understand something for the first time.

"Long story, I guess. Uhh… Princess, I'm sorry I'd to leave him in your care."  
"It's okay! It's been so long since I'd had happier times than this. That stupid Mokou hasn't shown up for the longest time already, so I'm more than happy to talk to guests."

_Even when the whole place is still quite messed up and fought in?_

"Usually she makes an even worse mess out of here… if she manages to fight all the way in. Usually we settle things in the forest."

_That's an even more disturbing thought. In other words she meant that this place gets thrashed regularly.  
_  
"And whenever one of us dies we'll wait another few months and then we'll fight again. This one with the Rou Youkai is probably an appetizer, but it's occurring too frequently lately."  
"Wait, what'd you mean 'whenever one of us dies'? You can't possibly die on a regular basis!"  
"I'll tell you more when you come back. Now hurry along already," smirked the Princess. I got the hint, and then I scooted back to my room as fast as I could.

Though, what the hell did she mean by that? _She really does die on a regular basis?_

**If you ask me, I think that's pretty screwed even for a mysterious world like Gensokyo.**


	11. ARC 2: Back to the Real World ?

**ACT II: Back to the Real World (?)**

With Pasonia S. Kero's return to the "outside", he aims to resolve the problems on the outside that has plagued him "inside", in any manner imaginable.

Would this cause him to create even more problems? Only Time will tell, and she's a mean lady.


	12. Resolutions few, Questions too many!

_**Author Notes: This section is **__**very deprived of Touhou references**__**, it being a "back to the real world" arc. I assure you, however, that this is temporary, but necessary to the story.  
If you know which game this references, please leave reviews. All readers are encouraged to review because I'd like to know how you think of my story, heheheh.**_

Author's Request: I would like to have a Beta-Reader for my story. If you are interested in Beta-Reading for an on-off writer, please PM me. Thank you very much!

"""""""

"Whoa… whoa… WHOA!"

The swirling caused by the teleporting did get a bit nausea-inducing, but at last everything settled from technocolor. When it did, I realized that I ended up in the back alley of my home-base Nordoff Fight Club, in the afternoon. _Pretty cooling for an autumn's breeze,_ I thought.

Save for my clothing (which I didn't think was necessary to take along), I have all my belongings with me. At least, once I get back home I figured I could have everything up in order.

"…hey, T.J., check that out. Isn't that our big guy?"  
"Uhh… well… yea! Why is he back here?"

I turned around only to be glomped by Jack real hard, down onto a back-alley floor no less. When I stood up, I was real glad to see the muscleman and T.J., our resident idiot.

"Pas dude! Where'd you been man? You had us worried sick!"

"…Heh, I'm sorry guys. I, uh, had a **bit** of trouble getting back here."  
Of course, that was just putting it very mildly, but I _did_ have trouble getting back home.

"A **bit**? The **whole fuckin' fuzz** is lookin' for ya! Says you laundered money from your fights and now they want to arrest you bad! That bastard Anselmo, if I have my hands on his neck I'll have it broken!"

I could feel the slight tremble in Jack's voice, which immediately made me realise how I missed the camaraderie. But business was business, and I have to set it right in ten days… _whatever I do_.

"You mean Asshole Anselmo? That's **new**," I blurted, all the while knowing exactly what transpired.

"I caught that asshole talkin' to Zachary at the police station the other day. Now we can't find that kid, or his mother. Then days later we hear you getting yourself into match-fixing shit, and knowin' you well enough, you ain't _that_ hard up."

"Is that why I couldn't access my own email? I've been wondering why I got locked out." I stress here that I know everything already, but I cannot make it too obvious to anybody else.

"No wonder we couldn't find you. I remembered we had a pact to hide at each other's houses if the headwind got too strong, but you showed up here instead."

_Actually, I totally forgot about that pact._

"Never mind man, how about getting us all outta here and into the club?"  
"…" Both men went silent. I feared the worst.  
"Hey, what's the matter now?"  
"Uhh… bro… the fight club's taken over by Anselmo's goons. The bulldozer is coming tomorrow at noon."  
"What? NO!" Exasperated, I let out a shocked cry only to cover my mouth quickly. "How'd they…"

"Old Sire's title deed to the place got transferred over to Anselmo, somehow," sighed Jack, referencing Andrew Jennings, Zachary's grandfather. "While the Old Sire's trying to figure out how to take the deed back, I don't think we ain't got enough time to stop their goons."  
"How the heck'd you transfer a deed without someone's knowledge?"  
"The only way I could think of is by hacking some kinda government records thing, eh, so Zachary's most likely it again."  
"I ain't know no computer shit, but if I see that kid," breathed T.J., "I'm going to wallop him until he throws up everything he knows."  
"Easy now, big guy," I mouthed. "That's why I'm back in here to right everything."

Up till now, it's clear Zachary's the key to the conundrum. I couldn't help but wonder about the watch.

"Let's think through this at my home then. I'm sure no one's gotten in yet."

""""""

"Home shweeeeeeeet home," said I, happy that everything at home is, at least, still intact and untouched. Too bad about the emails and stuff, I guess.

"Turn the dang TV on, you guys. I'm going to give myself some time on the treadmill."  
"Alright, chum."

I let the guys have their time in my living room – they probably need it – while I quickly scooted over to the basement and start tinkering with the device. Lunarian technology is really dang freakin' awesome, it even gives me a tutorial on rules of usage.

"Let's see… teleportation… teleportation… there!"  
_'Teleportation is divided in two areas – the outer area and the Gensokyo area. There's a time limit of ten days when used in between Gensokyo and the outside world. But in the outside world, there are less limits; parameters can be set according to known locations or known acquaintances and friends of the user. The user is limited to a maximum of five per ten-day frame. The limit will be displayed on the watch's 'five-count' section.'_

That's interesting. I guess, to set things right I'll be using my first teleportation on Zachary.  
_**Zachary… Zachary… Zachary…**_

""""""

"WHOA!"

I still can't get over the surprise of the teleportation, but at least now I have a better sense of my surroundings when the technocolor fades. I teleported to a suburb of single-storey houses, and this time I landed right beside a chute, which sure stank like five weeks worth of unwashed socks.

"Ugh, he's had to hide into worse places?"

Then I took a good look around the neighbourhood; in mocking contrast to the chute, the whole place seemed pretty serene and peaceful compared to the hustle and bustle around Nordoff, with roads lined by tall oaks and the likes. Although, of course, 'serene' and 'peaceful' being used in the _outside world_ context means peanuts compared to the one I've witnessed in Gensokyo.

I bided my time; if I were teleported here, one of these houses should be Zachary's. I snooped around the patio of the houses – easy since all four houses in the surrounding are linked by paved walkways – and I quickly found Zachary's mother, tended to by someone who seemed like a nurse, while staying incognito along the roadside, as though one of the cars belonged to me. I have no idea if the nurse is someone related to Anselmo, so I bided my time and waited until the nurse left the patio.

"Hi, Madam Jennings! I'm Pasonia, you remember? Zachary's friend!"

"Pasonia… oh, why hello! What brought you here all the way to Maryland?"  
_Maryland? They sure ran pretty far from L.A.!_

"Ah, I have to, uh, look for Zachary for some business. I believe he's in, right?"  
"You bet! Want me to make some coffee for everyone? They have some of the best home-grounded coffees in this neighborhood!"  
"No, no, it's fine Madam."  
"Really?" She seemed quite sad.  
"No, really, I'll be leaving quite quickly – you know how busy I could get!" I winked apologetically.

With the Madam's blessings, I made my way into the house. Taking care not to alarm anybody, I slowed down and trotted my way down the living room. Then I ran into the unaware nurse at close range and I nearly fell out of shock – stealth's so not me. Luckily, I was able to duck into the toilet before she realized there was someone else.

After a short moment of making sure no one saw me, I turned the knob from outside, then snuck into the room and slowly clicked it shut. Of course, that brought me Zachary's attention as he snapped back to look – presumably in horror.

"P-p-p-pasonia! How the heck'd you get here? That's it, I'm callin' the fuzz – this is fuckin' trespass!"

I held him by the collar before he could reach for his cell phone.  
Thinking of no better way to interrogate him, I simply asked: **"Why?"**

"**Why**? Because my ma is sick! I've phoned you in at least three times and each time I did, you said you'll help! I got sick and tired of your empty promises, but Anselmo promised me he'd give me what I want as long as you get into trouble. Suits me fine – I don't love you much anymore, like bro love, ya got it? He helped me when I needed it the most, and you? What the **fuck** have you done?"

"Wait a minute there, you said you freakin' called me, right? Where's the proof?"

"It's all in the cell phone."

I picked up the cell phone from the table, keeping one hand on his collar. Indeed, he has called me multiple times, and indeed the records showed I never picked any of his calls up.

"Hey, wait a minute…"

I checked the dates that he called, and promptly realized that he called me during the days I was stuck _inside_ Gensokyo. It would be fair to assume I was not even contactable then, but he clearly said I 'responded to his calls'. I dialed myself, just to see what's going on, and then I heard another mobile phone ring from the living room – my phone has been redirected!

"Huh?" At this time, even Zachary was surprised. I bet it didn't occur to him that it was an elaborate scam, simple-minded as this fool is.

"Hey, this is Pasonia here," said the voice, which sounded totally like mine. "I thought I told you I wouldn't pay you a dime even if you asked, fool? Stop bothering me!"

It has to be the nurse, I realized; I swore I heard the same voice from the living room. Zachary realized he's been fooled, so I assumed it was safe to put him back down on the chair – he wouldn't do anything bad to me unless he's manipulated, this gullible fellow.

"I'd have lent you the cash if you needed it badly, but I had been stuck in my own business in the time you called," I explained, avoiding referencing any of my misadventures flying about Gensokyo. "The me you'd been calling was an impostor, and he happens to be very good at cheating… I guess."

"… Well… The damage's done and all. I hacked your account, caused you trouble and all."  
"That's not so much a biggie anymore. I just need you to return everything back to what they were before I left for Japan."  
"… I'm sorry, Pasonia," blurted Zachary. "I was fooled into thinking you don't care anymore. I'm so sorry."

I believed Zachary was just gullible, so I decided I'd just walk back out the way I came in, happily ever after.

That was when I heard a loud "BANG!" from behind my back, and a sharp pain piercing my upper right thigh almost immediately after. Unable to bear the pain, I let out a yelp and crashed to the floor. It was then that Zachary rose from his chair again, but this time his attitude flipped one-eighty.

_I'd been such a fool, dammit! I should've known better!_

"**You think I am this easily fooled, EH? You think it's as easy as 'oh, it'll be fine once Zachary's convinced', right?** That ain't workin' anymore, buddy. I just wanted you out, you'd been the big timer for too long. Now it's my turn."

He emptied the burning bullet casing on my left hand, and I couldn't help but yelp again – it's hotter than a freakin' kettle!

"You guys took my silence for granted far too long. I want you to pay the price for your treatment of me," he mouthed, before firing a second time.

_I honestly thought, "Oh gosh, this is game over."_

""""""

When I snapped awake a while later, expecting to see something like a **purgatory**, I found myself still inside the **same room**, instead.

And the bullet, which was apparently directed at my head, was still _spinning slowly in mid-flight._

_I'd just stopped time? Dang amazing!_ But thinking carefully, I probably didn't actually **stop** time, just **slowed** it. I imagined if time had been stopped, the bullet wouldn't have moved at all.

"Ouch, ouch," I yelped, struck by the pain in my thigh as I rolled out. But now that I'm out of harm's way, I decided to get me some payback. I pried his fingers free of his own pistol, and then released the chamber for it to reload a second round. As I did so, time suddenly went back to normal and, for a while it was quite disconcerting to know that had I still been there, I'd really have been dead.

"Huh? How'd you move that fast?"

This time, with my right shoulder leaning against the wall for support, I fired one shot off his recently-relieved pistol. Unfortunately for him, I jolted because of pain; my aim went from his right thigh to his crotch, where his family jewels were.

"Arrrrrrrrrrrgh! Oh god, my p***s, you shot my god-damn p***s! What the f**k's wrong with you, jackass?"

"Shut the hell up," I retorted. "If I ain't makin' a ruckus while you shot me in the thigh, you'd do better to just shut it." I held my leg while limping my way to his computer, which he had left untouched since I got in. Not surprisingly, I found lots of damning evidence that pointed to Zachary being the bogeyman.

"_Money laundering, scandals, illegal betting, rigged game rumors_… seems like you already had a plan to play me out of the game of life," I blurted. "You'd rather eliminate me than see my success. Some friend you are."

"…" For the first time, he kept his trap shut.

"But dincha know the old man whom you stole Nordoff from, is your grandpappy? As in, your ma's father, you savvy? Really, now, I couldn't see you ruining your grandpappy's business could I?"  
"Why's my gramps involved in this? It's just you and me, you massive jerk."

I turned to him, looking at him straight.  
"Whatever involves Nordoff, involves your grandpappy and everyone else. I don't have the power to just give a damn about me alone, Nordoff's a collective responsibility. Since it all began because of me, it must end by me."

"As for you, though… Have you been jealous?" I taunted, now that our roles are reversed.  
"Have I been jealous? No, you're not worth it, fool." I'm not going to say I knew Zachary that much – he disproved _everything_ I knew of him when he fired that shot – but that certainly sounded like a denial.

"Nah, of course I **am** worth every bit of your jealousy," I retorted, "because my life seems on the up and up, right? Like, I've got a girlfriend and then I've got money, I've got property, I've got enough to live out a comfortable existence. I don't know what led you into this trickery business, or why you're doing this to me-"

"SHUT UP! YOU DON'T KNOW THE LEAST OF WHAT IT'S LIKE TO BE AS **PATHETIC** AS ME!"

I shoved him into the nearby wall. "Listen, kid, and listen good. You don't get to where I am by whining and cheating your way -"

I was cut mid-sentence as several public loudhailers began to go off simultaneously. I limped out towards the room window and suddenly found the skies awash with black dots. I looked up and the whole sky is full of men – but they're _all wearing non-American army uniforms!_

"Holy smokes, what the hell's goin' on here?"

Before long, I heard men shouting in a language that evaded me worse than Japanese did. Deciding that the bullet lodged in my thigh is going to be in the way, I just picked up the nearest tool nearby and forced it out of my flesh, which surprisingly didn't hurt me as much as I would have imagined although the pain was quite another matter. Soon after, I found small blue waves of visible static running across where the injury was, and it felt like I'd been given local anesthesia or something.

"Okay, whatever works. I'm going to need this gun... and for you to shut up."

I decided to scoot off before anything horrid happens. All it took was to press a button on my watch while no one was looking.

""""""

"Hey, Pas, you all right in there? Hey? HEY! Don't be trippin' the pills now dude!"

I opened the basement door in slight amusement, though the pain in my thigh and the need to walk normally chewed into my facial expression. "I ain't junkin' man, I went in there to get some stuff, dude, like, this pistol. What's up?"

"Hey, where'd you get that burn from?" T.J. remarked, referring to the burn mark I got not so long ago."  
"Uhh… it's nothing. Someone's hot charcoal hit me a while ago," I lied.  
"Really? That looks pretty recent. It seems wet, too!"  
"You think too much. Anyway, what's that panic in your voice for?"

_T.J. sounded totally flustered and uptight about something,_ I thought.

"Okay, I need you to calm down a little first."  
"I thought you're the one being antsy here, dude."  
"Shut it, man, **Private T.J.'s talkin' and no one be interruptin'**, yo!"  
"Alright, alright, what is it army boy?" Looks like T.J.'s really the one being more flustered.  
"Look, uh, I've been _recalled_."  
"Cool. And then?"  
"That's bad news, because this means we're _getting hauled ass_ by another country! But the hella shit is we don't know WHO!"  
"Uh, it's all over the TV now dudes!" blurted Jack. "It's the Russian Army comin' in hot!"

_So that's the same guys who stormed through Maryland?_

"Seems like it was related to that massacre at the Russian International Airport," remarked Jack. "But that's totally irrelevant to this; TV says the Russians are having an air party right above us now. The White House is going to be so screwed, man!"

"Damned, I thought Army sucked and that's why I bailed, but now I have to go _all the way back_ _to Fort Bragg_ and fight to defend this freakin' hellhole? What the heck?"

It was then that we all looked up; the air was once again filled with the same kind of bombers that I saw back at Maryland, and they were really dropping men by the truckloads. I could hear what sounded like cannon shots from way off the coast, and my guess was there were more coming in from the port area.

"What do we do now, boss? This shit's gettin' too crazy!"  
"Then let's just follow in on the craziness," I mouthed. There was literally nothing that could be done with the sudden change of objectives – on hindsight, everything that's happening to Nordoff and my property is peanuts compared to this invasion business.

I'm supposed to survive this war for ten frickin' days, eh? _**Now Gensokyo looks more and more like a viable permanent residence.**_

""""""

We all fled in my Mini Cooper, which basically meant that it was a really tight squeeze… once again, I am mildly putting it.

It wasn't long before most radio stations we were tuning in to had their broadcasts shut down to mere static – after all, the air boys could only do so much to get their aircraft up to intercept the Russians in such short notice. Every man on the street, tourist or otherwise, all grabbed whatever firearms they could find and did their best to retaliate against the invaders, though it was near hopeless.

After T.J. spotted anti-vehicle weapons, the three of us decided to stop driving and go on foot; it was best to keep running and gunning while the crazy Russians hauled ass behind and around us shouting like madmen.

"Jesus Christ, what the hell is this man?"  
"You're asking me a great question **professor**; bad news is, I _don't have a freakin' clue_!" I retorted in half-jest, trying to keep our spirits up amid the hail of loud gunfire. Since T.J.'s our only trained-to-shoot gunman (and secretly I had to try to minimize exposure to too many people), we have to use him as a "point man", as he calls it, and he's always in front of us with covering fire while the Russians attack everywhere with intense ferocity – us being mere flies.

"God damnit, those bastards just made us a question out of the Sign man!"

We were, by my estimation, nearing the Hollywood sign at Canyon Lake, where we were instructed by a nearby makeshift sign to get on the evac bus to the Army Center; it was there that we noticed that the Hollywood Sign now spelt "HOW" with everything else either broken or missing.

"**How**? We just kick their asses and get ourselves outta here—AUUUUGH damn!"  
"T.J.! Hell, he's been shot!" cried Jack in alarm. I swung around and saw blood seeping in on the long pants T.J. had been wearing, along with a rather nasty-looking expose of his flesh.

We were mere meters to the military evacuation vehicle and stuck at the intersection – it was literally waiting for us with the army boys hurrying us to get on it ASAP, but their hands were just as tied fighting off the Russians. The Russians soon discovered our position and I was forced to fight back with T.J.'s rifle, although my aim was probably as good as a drunk soldier's and I had to bail when the bullets flew my way.

"Dammit! We ain't gonna get there at all!"  
"It's… okay, guys… just let me go and run for your own lives. We'll see each other again in future, alright?"

T.J. then suddenly rose from the ground, grabbed his gun back from me while pushing me and Jack away, and began firing off wild buck shots to draw attention to himself. Jack and I ran and ran while he covered us, but I couldn't stand having a friend lose his life saving our skin.

_I cannot watch my friend die. __**I ain't gonna let him die on me!**_

It was that thought, I remember, that suddenly whirred everything down, once again, to _super-slow-motion_, sweat flying in mid-air and all over the place; even explosions have stopped _exploding, _so to speak. Once again, time has slowed around me, but this time it was even more surreal with all the chaos in the vicinity.

Since I now have much more autonomy with the immediate situation, I ran back towards T.J. and, though somewhat tedious, I managed to relief every Russian soldier within thirty meters of T.J. of their rifle, so they can't shoot T.J. I then tried to fire using one of their rifles at close range (the "no one can miss" range), but it would only click.

Thinking the rifle to be broken, I threw the gun aside; that was when I noticed then that a bullet was in the air where the rifle was. I assumed that the bullet was travelling in-flight, just like how the one directed at my head was, so I quickly took up the rest of the rifles and clicked once per rifle at close range. There were some I couldn't shoot out of so I just threw them away, and they end up getting stuck in mid-flight anyway!

I fired the last shot just in time as time suddenly 'started' again, and it was rather unreal for us three; T.J.'s got blood splattered all over him when he expected to be splattering some out of his own guts, Jack noticed I just _disappeared_, and the Russians that got close to T.J. realized in alarm that they suddenly had no rifles on their hands. I ran up to the stragglers and punched two of them hard enough to crack their jaws, before the pain from the earlier shot to my thigh suddenly came back. T.J. repaid the favor by shooting any Russian that got close, until the area had a breathable respite free of blood-hungry monsters.

"…what the hell just happened? I thought I was a goner there," exclaimed an incredulous T.J.  
"You sure as hell are **going** to be a goner," I deadpanned. "Let's get out of here before more of 'em Russians show up!"  
"H-hurry guys! The bus is leaving dang soon!" Jack shouted from the bus window.

"C'mon now, dude!" T.J. heaved me off the floor as we all scrambled towards the bus, now crammed to double its original capacity. The guarding soldiers stared at me with a bewildered expression – I think they noticed how I managed to simply _disappear_ from sight – but I would not have anyone question me as we scrambled to get on the evac vehicle.

**If you ask me, this shit of late is getting worse. I'm already starting to miss Gensokyo, dangit, and it wasn't supposed to turn out like this!**


	13. Ain't no Time for Plan B!

_**Author Notes: This section is still **__**very deprived of Touhou references**__**. Events in this arc don't lend me a good opportunity to sneak references in this time.  
This chapter is a **__**Modern Warfare 2**__** crossover, but it contains more than **__**just**__** MW2 this time. What I can say is, the last chapter and parts of this chapter sets events at Day 4 of events in MW2.**_

_**Author's Request (again): I would like to have a Beta-Reader for my story. If you are interested, please PM me. Thank you very much!  
This is a second upload – the first upload was a bit choppy and some text was missing. My apologies.**_

"""""""

"Say, bro," mouthed Jack, "how did you save T.J. from those Russians back there at L.A.?"  
"What'd you mean?" I asked, pretending not to know what he was talking about. I don't really intend to hide it from Jack or T.J. that much longer, but I don't want anybody else to be listening in on us while we're enduring a ride to the military base. I pinched him on his arm to signal my intention.

"Ah, well, if ya ain't willin' to say I won't be forcin', then."

The vehicle came to a stop gradually, and everyone on it was left wondering why.

"Private, what's the situation?"  
"We've all run out of gas, sarge!"

Just as the private finished saying his piece, someone began to open fire from outside; it seemed to be sounding from somewhere behind us. It was really gut-turning to see the private splaying blood right after speaking to us; with his head outside the bus at that point of time I figured he was a goner.

"Ambush! It's the Russians! Open fire!"  
"Everyone get down!"

Not a moment too soon – the entire vehicle rattled with bullet ping-pangs all over just as we threw ourselves to the bus floor; right behind us were the Russians, all screaming as though they want our blood real bad. If any of these god damn bullets hit us, we'll be done for. Glass shattered left and right of us, with most of the soldiers on the bus outside fighting for all of us.

"Go go go! Get out of this bus, it's not going to survive this gunfire!"

We quickly scrambled out of the bus – I ended up fireman-carrying T.J. off the bus despite my own limp, while the soldiers covered us. One of the army boys got hit right before we could enter the nearest building, and by the time I realized he was not following us, he was already riddled with bullets. Seconds later, the bus exploded in a ball of metallic flame, adding to the chaos that ensued.

"Bro! What the hell are you waiting for, get out of there!"

I felt totally helpless this time as Jack pushed me out of a grenade's way, as we both crashed into the nearest room before the corridor lit up in a flash of attrition. My head, fresh from experiences in Gensokyo, suddenly gave way as the fighting before me turned me from the inside out.

_All that appeared before me was a blur, utter confusion._

I thought I could handle the situation like everything else before, but the time stop wouldn't happen. I have no time to recollect my thoughts, process the information, and all I could feel was my heart racing and my head spinning in whirls.

"Hey, did you guys see that sign over there?" One of the civilians on the same bus earlier screamed. "We're very close to an air-raid shelter! Hurry!"

"BRO! WE GOTTA MOVE NOW!" I could only hear Jack keep trying to push me and I, stumbling and falling my way through the apartment building along with T.J., which shook really hard from what I thought was some kind of air bombardment.

"Jack, push along! We gotta help our bro out of trouble man! He's freaked out!"

I wished I could react with a witty remark, but T.J. was spot-on – _I am freaking out._ With all the loud gunfire and shells fired off from tanks that couldn't resist making loud cannon noises, I don't know what to do, and all I got was blood on my mouth (from biting my lips too hard) and tears from my eyes.

"Dude, don'tcha break down on me man!" T.J.'s voice was getting increasingly frustrated, but I still have no response to it even though I was totally aware what I was _not_ doing. "Push on! We're only a quarter of a klick from the air raid shelter!"

I gradually found myself starting to calm down a little bit, with my focus returning and my goal clear – to get to the air raid shelter before we all get hit.

"Argh!"  
"Dammit! Jack's taken a hit!"  
"It's the elbow… dammit, that hurts!"  
"Take the gauze," shouted T.J., rummaging a nearby dead soldier's vest for a large piece of gauze before throwing it in Jack's direction. "Press this on your arm!"

"Got it! Thanks!"

We were edging closer and closer to the air raid shelter, with soldiers beckoning us to get in as soon as possible, when suddenly a tank shell struck from right behind us. The oomph from the shock threw the lucky ones on the floor, and the unlucky ones, I saw, were in a pile of recently-collapsed rubble.

I felt something snap from somewhere behind my head. I touched it gingerly, thinking that something had struck my head, but nothing was there.

"Hey… hey… Jack… T.J…. are you guys there?"

No response. That got my whole being paralysed – _have we failed to survive after all?_

Slowly but surely, I stood up from where I was lying down on – the asphalt to be precise.

I surveyed my surroundings, and immediately realized two things; one, it turned azure blue all over, and two, _everything stopped in place._

"Is this a time stop again?" I pondered, raising my hand to myself. In doing so I realize that a blue streak of lightning (the exact same one that surrounded my shot leg from earlier) surrounded my entire right forearm. Its blue nicely blended with the azure blue in the environment. The time stop, while entirely unexpected, brought my confidence back up by a big notch and I began to figure out the immediate circumstances of the situation.

We, the survivors, were at most about a hundred meters away from the shelter's entrance, but I spotted a large vehicle firing in our direction (with the long bullets hurtling towards our group in mid-air). I presumed those to be from the enemy, and from the looks of it the troops at the front door were the apparent targets. Seeing that I have basically nothing to lose already at this moment, I took up a slab of brick from the nearby rubble and struck at the long bullets, which snapped after a few hits.

"Ouch!" I accidentally touched the bullet and its heat snapped at my fingertip while I sought to redirect the split bullets somehow, thinking that even if I managed to snap the bullets I would most likely just cause two bullets, instead of one, to hit the defenders. Seeing that there were quite a number of bullets along the way, I just snapped every bullet that was flying in our way just to buy us all some time in the event of the time-stop fading away. The surroundings began to look slightly brighter than azure, so I acted faster.

I decided to conduct a little experiment with the Russians, so I delivered a few kicks to individual soldiers along the bullets' paths. I noticed three soldiers that previously we did not notice and was about to fire on our group, so I punched them hard in the neck. All I got from the kicks and punches, however, were their bodies being dented in like a ping-pong ball. At this time, the surrounding became even brighter than before, which alerted me to what I thought was a likely end to the time-stop.

"I gotta lie in the asphalt I stood up from… just in case the rest of the guys suspect me again," I thought, laying myself down on the asphalt that I struggled to stand up from just moments earlier. As I lay, I noticed the blue wave on my arm getting dimmer and dimmer.

Then it just simply **vanished**, and time **suddenly** resumed – it was like pressing the play button on the VCR. The results were pretty spectacular; the bullets I split _exploded in mid-air_, not _fly in two directions_ as I had originally anticipated; I looked in the direction of the Russians that our group didn't notice, and was quite disgusted to find their splattered heads on a wall nearby – spine attached to it and all, straight out of a certain violent video game I've seen before when I was seven; our group yelped in shock and the soldiers were all surprised to see the explosions and stuff, maybe they were thinking that multiple mines have gone off in the area or something.

"What the hell just happened?" screamed T.J."Pas, you there man? We've gotta haul ass to the bunker now!"

""""""

"And, and then did you see that just now? I was like, _shit, the BTR's gonna hit us and this bunker's not gonna hold with so much gunfire._ Then suddenly the whole god damn place **exploded** and then these civvies came running in like their _pants were on fire._"  
"Shit me not, **Captain Obvious**, they **are** running while the soldiers are _shooting their asses_ man!"  
"Yea, but I mean, yea, they were like all shocked and stuff."  
"Just like you maybe? Look at you and your incoherence!"

The idle chatter of the group of soldiers nearby didn't cut much ice with me.  
I blurted, "Give me a break guys. You're disturbing our rest."

"Well, sorry… considering we barely have enough space for ourselves, mate," retorted one of the soldiers. I snarled – they probably figured themselves as heroes of Americans and were acting like they were the boss.

"Forget it bro. They're probably just as tired and surprised as we are," remarked T.J. as he poured me a cup of coffee from the communal dining area. "At least we now got somewhere to cover our asses."  
"Yea, while half the city's occupied by the Russians," remarked Jack. "I don't like how this is going on."

"Take it easy guys," replied the same soldier who irritated me. "We've got most of the anti-air battery active and last I heard, the SEALS are pounding their subs and bases," reassured one of the privates.

"How would you know, soldier," blurted T.J. in apparent astonishment, "that's another service from yours and I remember the soldiers don't usually do cross-service talk like this."  
"Who are you to question me in times of war like this, man?" The soldier was clearly pissed at T.J. "There's so much you don't know about our army anyway!"

T.J. flashed a tattoo on his arm – one that I've never seen before since he always wears a T-shirt in boxing practice – which looked like a service badge or something.  
"I was of 82nd Airborne. I served two tours in the Middle East since 2007. I'm at least ten years older than you, kid, so piss off. I know what's real and what's braggin'."

"Yea? Well why'd you become a civvie then, pussy old man?"

T.J. bit his lip – a sign of rising anger. "I landed flat on my face three years ago because the stupid idiot who prepared the parachute poked a hole into my fuckin' gear. I have a fear of flyin' now. Happy, jackass?"

"What, you think you're B.A. Baracus or something, with a fear of flyin'? That's a laugh! You just look it! You ain't even a fuckin' Ranger!"

T.J. was about to explode – I know the last time someone made a joke of it he threw the poor sod out of the fight club through the window – but I held him back. Before I could respond in defense of T.J , though, a burly guy bigger than our in-house muscleman by sheer girth, grabbed the foul-mouthed bugger of a soldier by the throat. It was rather amusing when I spotted the tattoo on his hand – it spelt "FOOL", which is perhaps the most ironic reference to the guy he's grabbing the throat of now.

"Nobody mentions me as an insult to anyone, fool."  
"Leggo, buddy!" The soldier kicked and thrashed, but couldn't reach any part of the juggernaut at all.  
"And nobody's gonna give a lecture on my behalf about planes."

"Settle down, Baracus," spoke another voice. The man, sporting an almost-balding head and looking pretty spirited in a wheelchair, was probably well into his seventies, but his voice was pretty sharp and commanding for his age.  
"What's it about flying, man? I'm probably **the best pilot in the world** and no one doubts it," sang another voice off a skinny-looking veteran, teasing the big black who proceeded to drop the fool from his hand and engage in a lengthy argument.

"I didn't expect B.A.'s name to be mentioned here," laughed the man. "Over thirty years, half of it outside service, and still we're getting some pretty good mentions, huh, Face?"  
"Yea, boss, that's a pretty long time already. Then again, we'd probably all die tomorrow. Look at them Russians running about L.A. doing crazy stuff."  
"We go on so many missions having so many people tell us we'll die, and we survived every one of them. Remember, we've been through those god-damn jungles too."

"My god, it's the legendary A-Team," breathed T.J. "Why're they getting stuck in this particular bunker?"  
"The A-Team, what the heck do they do? Look at you, being a fanboy."

The man in the wheelchair looked at me, and I couldn't help but feel slightly overawed despite what I just said.

"We do **anything**, and **everything**, kid," he smirked. "We're soldiers of fortune living day-to-day outta vans, and we pulled off gigs all over the country."  
"With **lots** of explosions," added the skinny guy. "And **lots** of planes, and helicopters."  
"Shut it, you pilot worse than my mother."  
"Is that right, Scooter-boy?"

_That sing-song tone was a very remarkable taunt, I'll be sure to use it when I get back to Gensokyo._

"I heard you guys had a pretty big bang behind your arses before you came in. We saw a few other guys around where you guys were running in from, who died pretty unnaturally, too," blurted the balding man.

_Well, I wondered how to explain that. No one would believe me if I said I cut the bullets in half with a brick, or kicked people and saw ping-pong dents in their throats._

"Probably Russians and their misfiring equipment," laughed the other guy whose name I remembered as Face. "In any case, d'you guys plan to enlist as fighting civilians tomorrow? The National Guard units were hit pretty hard and they're not expected until the day after."  
"I am," answered T.J. "82nd Airborne, sir. I've heard of stories about your break-out from Fort Bragg."  
"Well, that was donkey years ago. I'm not sure we could still do that now," chortle the senior militant. "But T.J. – that's the name right? – if you want to fight tomorrow, why not come along with us?"  
"Wait, you're asking me to join the A-Team? Pas bro, pinch me, I can't tell if I'm dreaming."

I hoofed him with my knee, and both of us yelped a little bit – him because I kicked a tad too hard, and me because I was injured.

"Hey, kid with the white hair, you want to join too?"  
"Me?" I asked, rather incredulously. "But I am not a soldier. You give me a gun and I'll probably use it to club someone else rather than use it to shoot."  
"As long as you can fight, kid," smirked the old man. "We've got a plan for tomorrow."

""""""

"This is pretty suicidal," I remarked. "Four guys, one helicopter, Russian uniforms, and a plan to blow up the ammo base with their own equipment."  
"I agree," gulped T.J, who by now must have regretted the decision to join the fight.  
"No sweat," laughed Face as he patted down on us from behind, as we walked quietly towards what seems to be a temporary office – I can't tell, everything's in Russian where we were.

Several hours before this, we were transported to the location in a container tank. As per instructions, we dressed up like the locals… in base, that is, meaning we took some Russian uniforms and used it as our own. Then we were instructed to stick some lapels on, which I understood as rank tags or something, and there we were walking in their base like we owned the whole place… or something.

_Probably something to do with what the two veterans were wearing,_ I thought.

The crazy pilot guy walked in front of us, as per the old man's 'precise instructions'. It became apparent why, as men after men stopped to salute him. I didn't dare ask any question because I was afraid that speaking in perfectly American English would cause us to blow our cover, so I had to assume it was something the guy was wearing. My heart raced even faster as we approached what seemed to be a canteen area, and when I looked to my right side T.J was breaking out in cold sweat.

Despite that, however, our fears were rather unfounded. It became apparent why we were waved through checkpoint after checkpoint – the two guys front and back of us were speaking Russian, enough to convince even me and T.J. that _they_ were Russian. The last hurdle was cleared as we entered a huge metallic container of some sort.

"Face, you've still got some of the best forgery skills in town."  
"And you've got some pretty good acting chops," came the compliment. "Now, you guys had better know what to do. We snuck the two of you in because we figured they would not question the two of you for being a size or two larger than usual as long as **officers** walked in front of them."

_So that's what it was, forging documents to get into base?_

We complied, placing the explosives we'd packed in practically every part of our stolen uniform. I was left wondering how the Army managed to pack explosives into something not bigger than a pack of smokes, but I just did what I was told – place the explosives, one every ten steps away from the walls. Since there was more than just one room, we just rinsed and repeated this process through the corridor.

"Speed up. The cameras would notice our action sooner or later. We've got to pack these rooms with explosives in two minutes, tops."

T.J. and I tried, but by the sixth of eight containers, it was apparent we might not be able to accomplish the overall objective. Noticing a red stream of **something** in my arm appearing on my arm, I pressed hard on it until it turned blue – and then suddenly _the whole place_ turned blue again, just like the time stop I accidentally did yesterday.

"So this is how I control the time stop," I muttered, as I quickly packed the room with explosives. Unlike yesterday's time stop, however, the blue faded pretty fast this time; I barely made it out of the room and back into my walking position at the seventh room when the time stop faded.

"Shit, we've got no time to pack the room," growled the skinnier guy, who proceeded to shout something of a warning in Russian as he ran out of the room.

"Throw away every remaining explosive on you already!"

"A-alright!" T.J. started to throw the items off and I pretended to throw as well by standing right behind our big guy, when in fact I've already placed whatever I had in the right places.

As the soldiers started to run into one of the ammo rooms with fire extinguishers (I assumed he shouted "fire" or something) and we out of the immediate corridor with the ammunition, the whole place shook worse than a magnitude seven earthquake as the explosions engulfed the entire corridor with flames and screaming Russians.

"Why'd the last room explode as well? We didn't arm anything in it!" Exclaimed an incredulous Face.  
"Probably the explosives rolled in, sir," I quickly brushed it off. "Please, we've got to run now!"

When we reached the end of the corridor, a rather light-looking open-top car was already there waiting for us.

"What took you so long, fools?"

Gunfire rattled from behind us, which I took as my cue to shove the now-overawed T.J. into the car as we scrambled to leave the base. Our vehicle shook badly after a while – I think one of the bullets hit the left tire – and the old guys decided it was time to throw some grenades as they chucked the grenades beside the doors.

"Woohoo!" Screamed T.J., who I figured was probably in a state of induced euphoria. "I'm one of the A-Team now! My name's T.J. Terrence and I'm unstoppable!"

Unstoppable he was in throwing grenades, this much I concede. I noticed that despite how the vehicle twisted and turned through the base, T.J. was cool with grenades and had them chucked perfectly into the vehicles that kept chasing us. The motherlode of achievements was when a vehicle similar to the one I split the bullets from appeared in front of us, and T.J. just chucked a grenade right into the man operating the turret. Needless to say, that throw ended the chase since the vehicle exploded spectacularly enough from the inside out, disrupting whoever chased us.

"On three, we jump off the vehicle!" shouted Face. "We're near the chopper now! One, two…"

I didn't wait for the three as I hopped off the vehicle, rolling on the asphalt. It sucked to have my face repeatedly slam the tarmac, but at least I was out of the vehicle. I then noticed the rest of my group hopping off more than two hundred meters from me.

"What the shit, didn't he say hop off on three?" I quickly scrambled towards the rest of the group, running in the same direction as they were running. But my running speed isn't nearly as good as my punching speed, and I noticed some of the Russians were shooting in my direction. I decided I had no choice but to keep running, and that was when time slows intermittently occurred. It was pretty ridiculous to run at normal speed when the bullets were all headed to my ass at different speeds. I kept on having to adjust my position with each time-stop, and I had a close shave with more than three bullets as they came close to either the left side of my head, or the back of my neck. I had to dodge them while I was running, and in their eyes I must've been teleporting.

"Hurry, Pas-kid! We need to get out of here now!" The helicopter nearby started, but before I could worry about friendly fire the helicopter's gun wiped out the Russians shooting at me.

"Alright! I'm in!" I screamed, jumping into the side of the helicopter. I nearly flew out of it when the chopper tilted _backwards _with the hatch at the back of the chopper open, and I had T.J. to thank for grabbing on to me as the chopper tilted forward again.

"You crazy ass idiot, the hatch behind's still open!"  
"Whoopsie-daisy," sang the pilot – the same guy that man B.A. was shouting at yesterday about a fear of flying. It then became pretty apparent why B.A. had a fear of flying – it must've been some stunt this guy pulled.

"I'd advise grabbing a hook now," shouted Faceman as the howling of the chopper made our voices choppy as well. I complied, and snagged two hooks to my clothing as we made a mad scramble out.

"When you have no flares," declared pilot-man, "**we go cold.**"

_Then the chopper suddenly went silent._

I didn't even have enough time to think of "what the fuck" before our bird suddenly dipped and nosedived. As it did so I heard a loud explosion coming from behind us – which technically speaking was above us, since we're actually falling to the ground – and then the chopper started up again, this time causing the whole chopper to swing around. I nearly puked with all the force straining my body, and T.J. already couldn't hold it in. The comical side of things was that, because the intermittent time-stop kept right on occurring to me, I could see T.J.'s puke _in the air_ and its exact composition of beef and spaghetti.

"Sorry, I couldn't hold it," T.J apologized.  
"No need. Sir, are we out of the danger zone yet?"

"I think we are out! Watch out, fighters incoming!"

I noticed several fighters coming in swiftly to take out the aerial vehicles chasing us, to which the two old men cheered hard for.

"I love it when Hannibal's plans come together," shouted Face in jubilation.  
"Alright, we're all headed home now! And for once I didn't need to cook curry tapenades!"  
"Well, that's 'cause he knows L.A. better by road than by air!"

I was relieved that this fight was over in less than thirty minutes. I now see why T.J. admired these guys so much, though I probably wouldn't take a second aerial ride with that crazy pilot.

""""""

"Thanks for the ride," shouted T.J. as the chopper took off with only that guy called Face at the back of it. "And thanks for the Desert Eagles!"

I held the rather heavy pistol gingerly, then decided I'll pass this to Jack instead.

"Too bad they're still constantly **wanted** by the government," sighed T.J. "But I do wonder where these guys get all the intel to put us both in such a crazy fight."

_True indeed – how'd they get to know exactly what was inside, and how to sneak the explosives in?_

"Well, I wouldn't ask now that **that's** over," I laughed. "Then again, why didn't you guys jump like I did just now?"  
"Because he said **three**, and you jumped at **two**!"  
"Really? I thought he'd have said three at that moment!"  
"You ass, you **assumed** too much! Come to think of it, though…"

I know. I guess Face and that other guy might've not noticed it, but since T.J.'s my buddy he'll definitely catch on to things.

"Yes. I figured you saw me running in a weird manner just now, right?"  
"Well… you did seem like you were teleporting forward bit by bit. Face and the other guy were too busy setting up the bird, but I saw you running like you've got that, uh, what was that… oh yea, that** Maple Story** teleport spell on you or something. You even fell to the floor like in the Matrix or something, and at that point I nearly wanted to call you **Neo**."

"Well, that's a laugh," I joked.

**Jokes aside, however… it was time to be truthful.**

"Well, T.J.," I said, taking off my headgear to allow myself a breather as we jogged towards the shelter, "you wanted to know what really is going on, right?"  
"With what, Pas-bro?"  
"With everything, like… From yesterday's wounding that you saw, to the teleporting run you saw earlier; I want to explain it all."

T.J. eyed me for a few moments. "I knew it. The Pasonia I knew didn't suddenly change so much. What old hag story are ya gonna give me, eh?"

I smirked, happy that, at last, someone I knew is going to **know** the full inside story.

"**Well, it all began when I reached Narita…"**


	14. Breaking Barriers

"Let me get this absolutely clear now. My dear buddy here is the last of his bloodline of you-kai, whatever that is, and is embroiled in magical stuff and the likes. Why does that sound like a freakin' Sat-AM cartoon?"

"But to me, that's **reality**," I answered. "I wished I could just go back in time and say, _look, this did not happen, and I ain't gonna screw my life around with girls who think they can make me a world of fantasy just by wearing fancily like those costumed Japanese girls._ The problem here is I can't help myself there, because they actually **can!** And they're real to me!"

T.J. stared forward for a few moments, looking on at the damage done to the Hollywood sign. Now even the letter H has been destroyed, leaving just the "OW" standing; it was as though the Russians were mocking and challenging us. A sense of hatred rose through my heart; admittedly, even though I've screwed this nation in my cursing ten times over and then some, this is still where I belong, and to see it getting hit this hard made me angrier.

"Them Ivans will get it from us when we level their Cram-leen or whatever they call it, along with that White Palace thing and whatnot. They ain't getting away from us for this," T.J. suddenly blurted, which brought the already-weird conversation to an awkward stop.

To me, the events of the past two days, everything, including the onset of war and the realization of a power I have never ever had, was beginning to overwhelm my head and already, after the hell ride in the morning aboard that chopper, I was already beginning to feel pretty dizzy.

Then suddenly I realize that the Hollywood sign doubled itself, and it began to read "OOWW". As if that wasn't enough, there were suddenly two buildings ahead of us when there should only be just one.

"Pas… **Pas**?"

I could hear him, but I couldn't open my mouth to respond in time… or rather, **at all**. The next thing I knew, everything went from double to black nothing, and I could feel my head crashing into the rubble we were walking on.

"Pas! Hang on dude! Guys, we need some help over here. Send a medic over, quick!"

All I could feel at that moment was **black**, for want of a better word to use. I could _feel_ what was happening to me; T.J. and some of the people from the shelter were rushing to carry me back into the safe haven, and I could feel my body being held onto on all fours. I just couldn't respond at all, not even opening up my eyes.

I remember what this feeling is called; it's called **helplessness.**

""""""

"_Hey. Hey, you hearing this or seeing this at all?"  
"Hu… huh? Ugh…"_

_I rubbed my eyes hard, but I couldn't feel my hands move; I could __**see**__ them move, though, which was the only kind of confirmation I could ever get. It was rather scary when I realized I suddenly had no sense of touch._

"_Nothing's wrong with you, kid," the voice spoke. "But I… don't know if you still remember who I am."_

_I could hear a distinct chime in her talking, but I struggled to remember who it was._

"_Remember how you had to duck a flying chair when I got out of its way?"_

"_Uhh… I couldn't really remember your name, but I remember you carry an umbrella around with you that day."_

"_Well… it doesn't really matter. In any case, I'm going to say this only once so listen carefully."_

"…_okay," I blurted, thinking it should be a rather serious matter if someone involved in the inside has to interfere with dealings on the outside._

"_You have to be aware that you __**cannot**__ succumb to any call to arms, aside from whatever you had done to keep yourself alive."_

"_Huh? But… why? Like, this is my homeland and she was the one getting hit for something I don't know nuts about!"_

"_Because behind the scenes, there's a man controlling everything, but even if I told you the name of this guy you're not likely to know who he is, and knowing will only land you in hotter soup."_

"_So you're telling me to just __**abandon**__ my homeland?"_

"_Human boundaries are much more malleable than you think," droned the voice, sounding impatient. "Remember, we've more or less established that you are not exactly a human, so it would do you very well to not think of yourself as human anymore."_

"_B-but how can I—"_

" _Don't meddle in their affairs – you most likely can't __**afford**__ to."_

""""""

"HAAAAAA-!"

I snapped awake, opening my mouth, wanting to shout and scream in horror. I then realized it was rather futile, since my larynx was rather strained and my throat rather dry, so what I did ended up feeling rather painful.

"Ungh… huh? Pas, you're awake! You had me worried for a second there, mate."

I took a look around; we're in some sort of makeshift tent, and given the beds you see in hospitals, I guessed we were in a temporary hospital.

"The doc's words had me worried for a sec there, bro. He said you were _completely_ fine, but given that I saw you collapse it was rather worrying, I thought you might've gotten yourself some disease or something he can't tell or something."

"Chill already, T.J."

"Oh, hey, sup guys. Glad to see you're awake now," blurted Jack, who held two cups of coffee in his hand.

"Hey, Jack, gimme a cup as well."

"Sorry man, they're all out and this all I got. Hang on."

He scooted off while T.J. kept fussing over me to make sure I really was fine – which I was, other than the initial throat pain. Jack came back to the ward with an empty cup, and proceeded to pour some coffee each from the two cups.

"Here you go – coffee for us three brothers. Tell me more about it, man, while this coffee's still hot."

"About… what? T.J., don't tell me you ratted off…"

"Don't blame him – I **coerced** him," Jack smiled slyly. "Hey, give me a fair chance y'know, you got to work with them A-Team or something so at least lemme have some of the spoils in your rather fantastic adventure. As for this bugger, he always remembers things in parts so he couldn't even give me a full story."

"Can't I tell you another time? It took me about two hours to finish talking to T.J. about it."

"Well, you see… I am thinking of signing up for boot camp. Once it's finalized, I'm leaving in about two days."

"Wait, why? Most of us here don't even know why this war began!"

"Well, you know, I still had a sister right? I took up temporary work at the UCLA's temporary mortuary today, and… and… there she was in the cold room. I fucking swear…"

"Oh, that's cool. How's she doing?" T.J. had to ask, but I roughly expected something chilling, given how Jack's voice shook when he was talking.

"Well, T.J… She smiled. _In her death._"

Upon hearing this, the whole atmosphere sunk and the aroma of coffee suddenly became rather poisonous. It was never easy dealing with death. I wouldn't know what I'd do if I had lost T.J. or Jack.

"Dammit. Sorry about it man."

"No, you don't have to be," replied Jack. "That's why I thought of signing up for the Army even though I know it probably would suck. I'm prepared to join Tina in His arms, but I must settle this score with them fuckin' Ivans."

_Dammit, can't I even give an answer to this scenario?_

_Yes, you can. Try this: "Live well, for it is the greatest revenge"._

"_Live well, for it is—" _wait a minute, who the hell is this speaking to me?

"Huh? Pas, bro, you all right?"

I recognized that voice – it was the same lady that spoke to me while I collapsed.

"Pas… Pas, yo, Earth to Pas?"  
"Huh? What? Oh, right. Well, you know, Jack… I ain't gonna hold you responsible if you want to screw me over with this."  
"I won't. We're bros."  
"Okay. Then listen – we shouldn't think of revenging ourselves against anybody anymore."

The two guys stared at me as though I was speaking Martian to them.

"Uhh, Pas dude, did the collapse knock your head off or something?"

"No, T.J., I'm serious. I've been thinking about stuff for a while. I had nightmares last night – " that was a lie – "of us dying in Russia. Can you imagine us getting hit by bullets in a land we don't already know, like these kids fighting us are, too? They're about our age, and we're pointing guns at each other. That's really wrong."

"Well, basically no one gives a shit about this during a war. It happens, or it doesn't."

"But I cannot stand the thought. I've read some shit about veterans of wars getting guilty-wracked and all because they couldn't save their buddies in this fight or the other. I don't want to spend the remainder of my life thinking what I could've done, you know, if it ever came to that. I'm sorry I'm such a coward."

All three of us went silent for a moment. T.J. was the first to come up with a response.

"You know, Pas bro, that hit the spot with me. I probably wouldn't know how to respond either."  
"Me neither. I hadn't considered what I'd do if I knew I could have saved you, or what you would do for me if you thought you got me killed."  
"So, we're settled right? No more talk about going to Russia."  
"Hell yea. Every fight we fight now, we only do it to protect ourselves –"

There was a loud boom from I don't know where, but the boom certainly shook the room quite hard.

"Holy shit, did you guys see that?"  
"Huh, what happened?"  
"There's this blue wave of thing in the air! Look!"

T.J. and Jack decided they'd rush out to see what the commotion was all about, while I decided to contemplate my next course of action in the relative darkness of the room.

Not a moment too soon, however, I was greeted by the sight of the space in front of me tearing apart. I expected it was someone from within Gensokyo, so I wasn't shocked anymore. If it were my brothers, they'd probably be shocked beyond all reason.

"…_I see you've adapted yourself to the strange and unexplained,"_ answered the blonde lady from within the portal, as though she could read my mind like Yuuji does.

"It's hard not to when you've lived within it for a while," I replied. "What's the matter now?"

"_This war will end tomorrow."  
_"Cool. So what's wrong with it?"

"_But the reason for its ending will destabilise this country fundamentally."_  
"Wait a second," I halted her. "Didn't you like, just told me you didn't want me to get enlisted in the Army? Why're you doing this for, then?"  
_"I owe George a debt. That war hero with white eyes sacrificed his youkai powers to create __**your**__ country – if you choose to call it so – and prior to that I owed him a debt for saving me in a witch hunt."_

I paused for a bit, thinking through the more important Georges we can have in this country.

"By no chance you meant George as in **George Washington**?"  
_"Gosh... Maybe I should view you as a being somewhat more enlightened."_

I wasn't flattered by that rather rude commentary, but unlike Suika I don't know what this woman is capable of, so I just kept my trap shut. In the midst of this, I was quite aghast at the thought that the father of our country, is himself a youkai.

"_Therefore, knowing all that now, you will have to do something tomorrow to assist me."_

"Me?" I pulled my patient garb forward. "See this? It's called a patient's garb. I'm _hospitalised_, how'd you expect me to help you?"

The lady wasted no time putting her hand forward. I noticed she suddenly stuck her hand through my body, but I could feel nothing at all… until I suddenly felt **fitter** than ever before.

"There. Sickness and health are all but opposite sides of the same coin."  
"What the… hey, what the hell did you just do to me?"

"Oh, I just twisted your status around. You were 'sick', right?"  
"Yea. What's the deal with that?"  
_"I could just twist it around to make you the __**opposite**__ of 'sick', which is 'healthy'. How hard was it to comprehend that, newly-minted youkai?"_  
"Hey, I ain't no factory produce, mind you," I blurted.

"_Huh."_ She gave nothing more than an exasperated sigh, before tearing the space apart again and stepping right into it.  
_"I've lived long enough, but I haven't seen an 'important figure' being a worse… if I may, 'pussy'… than you. So it does look like there can be something different about this world after all."_

Once again, I wasn't quite able to swallow the insult, but now, more out of moral obligation than anything else I **had **to. She disappeared into the gap seconds before my brothers came back, their face a look of anything but calm.

"Bro… you can't believe what we all just saw," blurted Jack, his voice trembling. "There's this cloud of blue coming out somewhere east."

""""""

It was hours since this "blue cloud" appeared in the east and dawn quickly approaching, but no one could give a definite answer as to what it is. As I walked out of the ward area and into the clear open, it became clear that electronic communications were halted, as I spotted more and more people punching their phone's keys hard, presumably hoping the harder they pressed the more likely their calls will go through.

"Phone couldn't get through," sighed one of the middle-aged guys, his brows creased and caked with dirt, presumably from doing a lot of carrying work. "Now I've lost my only way of calling my ma."  
"Strange, even my satellite phone don't work now. Did someone just kill a satellite up there?"

Given the strange circumstances behind that blue cloud, it dawned on everyone – myself included – that the cloud could be linked to the calls that couldn't get through. Still, why would anyone want to do that?

"It just doesn't make sense," blurted Jack. "I ain't no master tactician, but neither side would risk blowing a satellite down because they need it themselves…"

It was around this time that that guy… I think he's called Face, from A-Team, showed up from a collapsed building nearby.

"Washington's EMP'd. Nobody can call across the country now," he remarked. "As far as I'm concerned, every pilot as far as Chicago can't fly their bats and birds."

"How'd you know that?"

"Because I, His Majesty Murdock, the greatest pilot on God's greenest earth ever, nearly crashed while flying my little Apache across the country, that's how I know," smirked a skinny guy, whom I recognized as this morning's crazy-ass pilot guy.

"Y'gonna say that all day, or admit that **your** flying sucks, Murdock?" came the snicker from the bl… wait, no, African-American… guy in the car earlier, I think his name was B.A. or something.

"Cut it out, you two. After so many years in and out and bones getting all crackin' and beat up, that's pretty embarrassing from you both," growled Face. "Now, as it is, we've also got word that Houston has lost contact with the International Space Station."

"That… isn't that like, this huge freakin' satellite? Don't tell me…" Jack's voice was a bit worried.

"Unless I'm dead wrong about it, the EMP must've hit the ISS and any other satellites unfortunate enough to be in the vicinity."

"That's why satellite phones don't work, either, huh?"  
"Well, they're called satellite phones for a very good reason," retorted Jack. "So what's the deal now? Are we going to get any sort of help from now on or we're just gonna 'F' ourselves here?"

"There's two extremes to this. One, the Russians may become frightened by the attack and stop whatever war operations they were at – after all, most of their main force is either dead or in pieces at this time. The other one would be that their forces will just go attack anyone and anything."

As we spoke, a column of what seemed like war vehicles began to roll from a distance.

"Did you guys schedule any deployments?"  
"Not that I know of. You can go ask the soldiers at the back of this place," answered Jack.

Face took off hastily, while B.A. urged everyone to pick up whatever firearms they could find. As far as they were concerned, it seems, anyone coming in like that is an enemy. I couldn't really handle firearms, so I did the next best thing; I flipped over some stuff in the makeshift kitchen and got me a butcher's chopper, then ran to hide in wherever they could conceal themselves.

"What the hell, bro? What are you going to do with a **bloody chopper**?"  
"I can't shoot," I blasted at him. "I can still miss even if my target is as close as you are to me right now!" That much is true; the memory of me shooting Zachary in his bejeweled region wasn't that far off.

"First time I've seen someone with such bad aim, then," growled the big man. "Shush everyone, here they come."

The vehicles made a rather irritating whirring sound as they rolled into our area. Gradually, the vehicles stopped and a lot more familiar accents were heard as orders were being shouted and stuff.

"Get a move on! We need to secure any and every supply we get! We're moving to Hotel Site Bravo in sixty mikes!"  
"What the… isn't that our guys? Why'd he think this place's dead?"  
"Shush. I don't get a good feeling from this," signaled B.A.

Face dashed back from the far side and came back signaling a thumbs-down. B.A. snapped his rifle ready, while I grasped the chopper on my hand.

Gunfire suddenly rang out from the far side, and then in an instant the whole area went to hell.

"Enemy contact! Contact!"

The whole place rang out with all sorts of gunfire and screaming. My brothers and I could only huddle behind a nearby building rubble/cover while B.A. and everyone else kept firing forward. T.J. chucked a few grenades forward, but to no effect. The response, however, was really overwhelming; a couple of rockets came flying our way and it definitely was going for the home run.

It was there that, in full view of the entire crew, my time-slow manifested itself as it activated without warning once again. I literally went up to the rockets, then struck them really hard and then backed out of the area.

I pressed on the stream of electricity that came from my hand, and time returned to normal as the rockets exploded. B.A. urged everyone into his jeep, which thankfully wasn't parked too far from our area, and soon about ten of us squeezed into the back of a MPV meant for five.

"There they are! Get them!"  
"Open fire! Open fire!"

_Oh shit, this is not good._ I pressed on the electricity too soon and now, the soldiers are getting way too close and are firing on us.

""""""

_To the gods above,  
lend me your strength  
so I may shield my dear friends…_

"_**Time Technique [Twilight Zone Snap], activate!**__**"**_

""""""

_What the hell happened?_ That was the first line I asked myself as I looked at the situation around me the moment I uttered that line out of nowhere. Every hostile soldier was covered in some sort of eerie, metallic blue that I could not figure out at all.

"… Pas bro, just **what the hell did you do to them**?" blurted Jack, as the rest began to recover. Most of them were originally sprawled all over the MPV, and it seemed, judging from their relieved expressions, that they were cocksure that they would die there and then.

Indeed, it looked hopeless for a moment there. Even I nearly gave up.

"Whoa, that's some serious magic you pulled there… what the hell happened to those soldiers? They're all **blue**…" T.J. gasped, still over-awed by the sight of the blue soldiers.

"… I… I don't know."

The electricity was still flowing from my palms, so I know the spell, the magick, whatever it is, is still pretty much active, but for the life of me, I don't know what the heck I just did. I don't even remember what I uttered in the heat of the moment.

Like Jack and the rest of the bewildered onlookers, every hostile soldier that came within range turned **solid blue**. With the spell still active, I tried touching one of the soldiers; that soldier began to 'melt' rather literally until it was a blob of blue on the floor, leaving only his firearm and whatever he was wearing.

One curious bee from among the escaping people then went to touch another blue-covered soldier. That soldier 'melted' too, but so did the fingertip of the poor curious guy, as he went yelping and screaming that it was 'hot' and that 'something is eating into his index finger'.

"…I think I get it now," blurted Jack. "My wild guess is that whatever spells you just casted, froze them in time. Touching them tore their very existence asunder, and thus they, unable to exist at the same time in their frozen timeline and this one, melted to the floor."

"Um, Jack, when did you get so good into this sort of thing, Jack?" I asked, incredulous that Jack was able to come up with an answer that flew over my head.

"Well, I was just making up sci-fi shmuck. But it isn't **that** long a shot is it?"

"As long as them idiots are _dead_ or _immobilized, _everything's okay for me," grunted the bl... I mean, B.A.  
"Now you two get in the car. Get that curious injured John Doe in the back too, my first aid's under the carpet."

I was tempted to feel sorry for that "John Doe"; somehow B.A. made his rather pathetic predicament sound hilarious.

As for me, I didn't dare touch anything or anyone because of my electrically-charged hands, so I could only ask Jack and T.J. to help me into the overloaded MPV in a rather awkward manner – with my hands up in the air the whole time. I don't even dare touch the roof of the MPV for fear of poking a hole through it… and that's the least of damage I could potentially cause.

"Damn, I don't know, Pas bro, your existence now either rocks or sucks. There's no middle point right now," joked Jack as he heaved all eighty kilos of me in.

"Hey, Jack, stop rubbing it in," chastised T.J. "B.A. boss, can we move now?"  
"Well, we're waiting for Murdock and Hannibal to get out… though, if I had a chance I'd rather just leave Murdock here-"

"Ahem! No badmouthing His Majesty behind his back, B.A.!"

Two men approached our vehicle from behind the rubble. My first impressions were that they were a bit roughed up, presumably from the fighting, but once they saw the blue guys and the MPV whirring they made a dash for us.

"Sorry, we were caught up in the fighting for a bit," apologized the older guy whose name I couldn't quite remember.  
"What the hell were those blue statue-like things? And kid, what's wrong with your hands?"  
"… long story, sir. I'll explain if I get the time and the chance but _**can we leave this god damn place first?**_"

_Damn, I hate having to repeat the same story over and over again._

And it was at that moment that something incredulous happened. Specifically, **someone** incredulous happened.__

_**"Hey, Pasonya, long time no see!"**_

**I just felt my world go black once again. Oh the good times.**


End file.
